Vitality west end richmond
Bon Air and the RVA Southwest Borderlands
2018.06.25 19:42 xRVAx Bon Air and the RVA Southwest Borderlands
Bon Where? This sub is a fork of RVA for ZIP codes 23235 and 23225 ... Bon Air and the RVA Southwest Borderlands are basically the New Fan. This sub may include include discussions of **Northeast Bon Air** (Richmond VA, Stony Point, Janke Road, and Forest Hill Ave), **South Bon Air** (The Arboretum, Stonebridge, The Boulders and Midlo Turnpike), and **West Bon Air** (Robious, That Mall, JRHS, and Village of Midlothian aka "VoM").
2013.03.22 17:55 frisellan All that is Maplewood Missouri
The City of Maplewood is centrally located in mid-St. Louis County. It is bordered by the City of St. Louis to the east, Webster Groves to the south, Brentwood to the west and Richmond Heights to the north. "Somewhere between Mayberry and Metropolis is Maplewood!"
2023.05.29 18:12 saltbay_ IAM analyst looking for a job!
I am an IAM analyst with many years of vital experience looking for a good job opportunity. I work in a contract position at a big international bank and the project is coming to an end soon.
So I’m just putting it out there incase someone’s willing to help. I’ll greatly appreciate any help, referral, suggestions or recommendations. Thanks everyone!
submitted by saltbay_ to it [link] [comments]
So I’m just putting it out there incase someone’s willing to help. I’ll greatly appreciate any help, referral, suggestions or recommendations. Thanks everyone!
2023.05.29 18:11 saltbay_ IAM analyst looking for a job!
I am an IAM analyst with many years of vital experience looking for a good job opportunity. I work in a contract position at a big international bank and the project is coming to an end soon.
So I’m just putting it out there incase someone’s willing to help. I’ll greatly appreciate any help, referral, suggestions or recommendations. Thanks everyone!
submitted by saltbay_ to iam [link] [comments]
So I’m just putting it out there incase someone’s willing to help. I’ll greatly appreciate any help, referral, suggestions or recommendations. Thanks everyone!
2023.05.29 18:05 anon172649 Weird guy outside my apartment at 4 am
When I was younger, I got a job in a major city across the country, so I got an apartment. I'm a country girl, so I loathe the city and all its glass and stone, and therefore I happily paid the premium for the one apartment complex I could find that actually had greenery in that it had small green "fields" around it. Like a 10 foot strip of green between the building and the road, but it was better than pavement.
The layout of the place is somewhat relevant, and to make it easier I'll use compass directions to give you an idea. The apartment building was your typical skyscraper, on the corner of a highway access road and a regular street that went downtown. The highway was north of the building, traveling east to west. The side street was to the east, running north to south. South of the apartment building was the surface parking lot, which sat on top of an underground parking garage. Between the apartment building and the southern parking lot was a small green island, basically the side of a hill as the land sloped up from the underground garage entrance up to the surface lots on top of it.
The main door of the apartment faced the side street (across which was a well-lit square where neighborhood holiday events took place, and a bunch of small boutiques and further down a mall, so it was bright and busy almost all the time. It sucked but it meant the place wasn't creepy at night). The apartment also had a side door on its south end, through the basement (not a creepy basement, well lit and also where the gym, laundry room, and party room were. The apartment was on a hill so the entrances were on different levels). The side door let out toward the parking garage and the parking lots.
There are two entrances to drive onto the property from the side street, one at the north end of the building and one at the south end. Between the apartment and the side street was a drive-thru like lane, with street-facing parking on one side but no room to park on the apartment-side. This drive-thru lane went from the north street entrance to the south street entrance (a stoplight intersection), which was also where the parking lot split. The south street entrance was convoluted. If you were driving onto the property from there, you could either take a right onto the drive-thru lane, go straight to turn into the underground garage entrance, or go left to drive up onto the surface lot.
My typical routine would be to get up at 4 and let my dog out to pee. I would take him out the south side door, cross the little lane that led to the parking garage, and let him pee in the little island of grass between the entrance to the garage and the surface lot. Sometimes I'd go further, crossing to the sidewalk beside the actual street, since there was a strip of green there between the parking spots and the sidewalk.
That morning, I had stayed in the island next to the parking garage, letting my dog do his thing. I tend to pace, so while he was sniffing about, I was casually strolling back and forth. I do this out of general restlessness, but it doubles as an excellent way to keep a good 360 degree awareness of my surroundings.
During one turn, I glimpsed something between the cars parked facing the street on that thru-lane. It was a lone figure on the sidewalk by the side street, shoulders slightly bent against the cold, head down, walking south, hands in the pockets of his dark jacket/hoodie. I'm often out this early to go jogging, and I've seen the occasional early bird doing the same, so I had no qualms about a guy walking on the sidewalk. I literally notice nothing else about him except the dark jacket and his location.
I turn away, and my dog is still taking his sweet time, so my slow pacing eventually turns me back toward the street. I notice the guy on the sidewalk cut across the green strip and between the cars parked facing the street on that drive-thru lane. This is the first time I really take note, because that particular area is a short albeit steep incline from the sidewalk to the parked cars. He easily could have been taking a shortcut to get to the south side door of the apartment, but the actual sidewalk turnoff (at the south car entrance) was like 10 feet away from him, so it was a relatively unnecessary shortcut. Whatever, he crosses the drive-thru lane toward the south side entrance, so I pay it no mind. My pacing is slow, so even as I'm turning, I still have him in my peripherals. He definitely heads to the door, so I proceed to ignore him as I turn back to my dog, who is still taking his sweet-ass time sniffing a particularly interesting spot in the grass.
As I'm looking at my dog, he suddenly stops sniffing and lifts his head slightly, ears pricked as he stares at something behind. He had seen the guy crossing the thru-lane earlier and ignored him, and he posture wasn't any more defensive than it usually is, but I just notice. That's when I realized I hadn't actually heard the side door open. You need a key fob to enter any of the entrances, which makes a loud beep, and I hadn't heard that.
My pacing turned me around again, and that's when I see the guy walking away from the door, as if back toward the street or parking lot. But the second I catch sight of him, he stops. And he's just standing there on the curb of the little lane to the garage, opposite me where I am on the green island. He's just standing there facing me, hands in pockets, looking right at me, me standing there looking right at him.
(I always carry pepper spray on a strap that wraps around my hand, so it's always secure in my palm, and since I was using that hand to hold my jacket closed since the zipper broke, the mace can was clearly visible. Looking back, I wonder if that's why he stopped walking when I turned).
I'm normally dumb and absentminded enough to not feel anxious in situations when I should. That whole "Gift of Fear" thing simply doesn't exist in me. I didn't get any chills, no queasy feeling, no hair raised on the back of my neck. But I did have a very loud and decisive voice speak up in my head that just said, "Nope."
So I tug the leash and start out for the sidewalk, crossing the convoluted "intersection" of parking lot lanes, intending to make my way to the north main door. The second I move, though, so does the guy! He steps out sideways, stepping off the curb and crossing the convoluted "intersection that isn't an intersection," perfectly angled to cut me off right in the center. So I do another "Nope" and spin on the ball of my foot to head for the other sidewalk, south of the intersection, as if to let my dog pee over at that green strip instead.
In my peripherals, the guy changed direction, too. He took a left, heading back toward the sidewalk to head north, literally going back the way he came. I could see him the whole time from my vantage point next to the sidewalk now, so I know for certain he did not go to the north main door of the apartment building. He just kept walking along the street until he was gone. That's ultimately the only reason I'm putting this here, because up to then, a large part of me had rationalized this behavior as that of a guy simply trying to get home but had forgotten his key fob (the north main door has a desk person who can buzz you in).
But he didn't go to the main door of the apartment, and the brief moment of him just standing there staring at me, and nearly cutting me off, then changing course... I don't know what to make of it. Like I said, I wasn't panicked, but then I usually don't get that way because my first instinct is to drop all emotion and face weird situations analytically. But the event always really stuck out in my mind, and I honestly can't determine if that instance really was "weird" or I'm making a bigger deal of it because it was 4 in the morning and I was tired and wired.
submitted by anon172649 to creepyencounters [link] [comments]
The layout of the place is somewhat relevant, and to make it easier I'll use compass directions to give you an idea. The apartment building was your typical skyscraper, on the corner of a highway access road and a regular street that went downtown. The highway was north of the building, traveling east to west. The side street was to the east, running north to south. South of the apartment building was the surface parking lot, which sat on top of an underground parking garage. Between the apartment building and the southern parking lot was a small green island, basically the side of a hill as the land sloped up from the underground garage entrance up to the surface lots on top of it.
The main door of the apartment faced the side street (across which was a well-lit square where neighborhood holiday events took place, and a bunch of small boutiques and further down a mall, so it was bright and busy almost all the time. It sucked but it meant the place wasn't creepy at night). The apartment also had a side door on its south end, through the basement (not a creepy basement, well lit and also where the gym, laundry room, and party room were. The apartment was on a hill so the entrances were on different levels). The side door let out toward the parking garage and the parking lots.
There are two entrances to drive onto the property from the side street, one at the north end of the building and one at the south end. Between the apartment and the side street was a drive-thru like lane, with street-facing parking on one side but no room to park on the apartment-side. This drive-thru lane went from the north street entrance to the south street entrance (a stoplight intersection), which was also where the parking lot split. The south street entrance was convoluted. If you were driving onto the property from there, you could either take a right onto the drive-thru lane, go straight to turn into the underground garage entrance, or go left to drive up onto the surface lot.
My typical routine would be to get up at 4 and let my dog out to pee. I would take him out the south side door, cross the little lane that led to the parking garage, and let him pee in the little island of grass between the entrance to the garage and the surface lot. Sometimes I'd go further, crossing to the sidewalk beside the actual street, since there was a strip of green there between the parking spots and the sidewalk.
That morning, I had stayed in the island next to the parking garage, letting my dog do his thing. I tend to pace, so while he was sniffing about, I was casually strolling back and forth. I do this out of general restlessness, but it doubles as an excellent way to keep a good 360 degree awareness of my surroundings.
During one turn, I glimpsed something between the cars parked facing the street on that thru-lane. It was a lone figure on the sidewalk by the side street, shoulders slightly bent against the cold, head down, walking south, hands in the pockets of his dark jacket/hoodie. I'm often out this early to go jogging, and I've seen the occasional early bird doing the same, so I had no qualms about a guy walking on the sidewalk. I literally notice nothing else about him except the dark jacket and his location.
I turn away, and my dog is still taking his sweet time, so my slow pacing eventually turns me back toward the street. I notice the guy on the sidewalk cut across the green strip and between the cars parked facing the street on that drive-thru lane. This is the first time I really take note, because that particular area is a short albeit steep incline from the sidewalk to the parked cars. He easily could have been taking a shortcut to get to the south side door of the apartment, but the actual sidewalk turnoff (at the south car entrance) was like 10 feet away from him, so it was a relatively unnecessary shortcut. Whatever, he crosses the drive-thru lane toward the south side entrance, so I pay it no mind. My pacing is slow, so even as I'm turning, I still have him in my peripherals. He definitely heads to the door, so I proceed to ignore him as I turn back to my dog, who is still taking his sweet-ass time sniffing a particularly interesting spot in the grass.
As I'm looking at my dog, he suddenly stops sniffing and lifts his head slightly, ears pricked as he stares at something behind. He had seen the guy crossing the thru-lane earlier and ignored him, and he posture wasn't any more defensive than it usually is, but I just notice. That's when I realized I hadn't actually heard the side door open. You need a key fob to enter any of the entrances, which makes a loud beep, and I hadn't heard that.
My pacing turned me around again, and that's when I see the guy walking away from the door, as if back toward the street or parking lot. But the second I catch sight of him, he stops. And he's just standing there on the curb of the little lane to the garage, opposite me where I am on the green island. He's just standing there facing me, hands in pockets, looking right at me, me standing there looking right at him.
(I always carry pepper spray on a strap that wraps around my hand, so it's always secure in my palm, and since I was using that hand to hold my jacket closed since the zipper broke, the mace can was clearly visible. Looking back, I wonder if that's why he stopped walking when I turned).
I'm normally dumb and absentminded enough to not feel anxious in situations when I should. That whole "Gift of Fear" thing simply doesn't exist in me. I didn't get any chills, no queasy feeling, no hair raised on the back of my neck. But I did have a very loud and decisive voice speak up in my head that just said, "Nope."
So I tug the leash and start out for the sidewalk, crossing the convoluted "intersection" of parking lot lanes, intending to make my way to the north main door. The second I move, though, so does the guy! He steps out sideways, stepping off the curb and crossing the convoluted "intersection that isn't an intersection," perfectly angled to cut me off right in the center. So I do another "Nope" and spin on the ball of my foot to head for the other sidewalk, south of the intersection, as if to let my dog pee over at that green strip instead.
In my peripherals, the guy changed direction, too. He took a left, heading back toward the sidewalk to head north, literally going back the way he came. I could see him the whole time from my vantage point next to the sidewalk now, so I know for certain he did not go to the north main door of the apartment building. He just kept walking along the street until he was gone. That's ultimately the only reason I'm putting this here, because up to then, a large part of me had rationalized this behavior as that of a guy simply trying to get home but had forgotten his key fob (the north main door has a desk person who can buzz you in).
But he didn't go to the main door of the apartment, and the brief moment of him just standing there staring at me, and nearly cutting me off, then changing course... I don't know what to make of it. Like I said, I wasn't panicked, but then I usually don't get that way because my first instinct is to drop all emotion and face weird situations analytically. But the event always really stuck out in my mind, and I honestly can't determine if that instance really was "weird" or I'm making a bigger deal of it because it was 4 in the morning and I was tired and wired.
2023.05.29 18:02 AutoModerator Live Outreach in Toledo - Old West End Festival Sat., 3 Jun. '23 at 12 PM
 | Live Outreach in Toledo - 50th Annual Old West End Festival submitted by AutoModerator to RankTheVoteOhio [link] [comments] Join us as we take to the 50th annual Old West End Festival to educate the community about Ranked Choice Voting. We'll meet at Macelwane Park, just outside of the festival border, for a brief training before venturing into the festival space. After we introduce each other and practice canvassing, we'll split into small teams to grow the movement for better elections in Ohio. You can bring your own pen/clipboard and practice beforehand with our quick-start canvassing kit or a pitch training on Zoom, OR we will provide you with supplies and show you how to give a quick pitch for RCV on the spot! RSVP here. Please note that the meetup point for this event may be subject to change as parking can be tricky during this event. Any changes to our meet point or any other pertinent information will be shared with those who RSVP. When: Saturday, 3 June 2023 from 12:00 - 3:00 PM Where: Macelwane Park in Toledo Contact: Josie Schreiber · jschreiber[at]rankthevoteohio[dot]org https://preview.redd.it/xtrulii0xm2b1.png?width=1500&format=png&auto=webp&s=b787b38a9e320687246867caf6b63c8255bc248c |
2023.05.29 17:58 zaririi What is a Rational Female?
What is a rational female? Quite simply, it is a counterpoint to being a Feminist (i.e. irrational) female. Feminism is rooted in the idea that women are oppressed by men, and thus are victims who should despise our womanhood. Most Feminists, from Gloria Steinem to Louise Perry, champion female victimhood and blame society, men, and the patriarchy for women's problems. Instead of teaching women to become better people, love our womanhood, be confident in ourselves and honour men, Feminism encourages women to be angry, bitter, and blame everything on the patriarchy.
I truly believe that striving to be a rational female will help women overcome much of the nonsense and indoctrination that Feminism has pushed into us over the years. I am planning on publishing a non-fiction book either end of 2023 or beginning of 2024 called The Rational Female which will serve as a good basis for this new, non-Feminist vision of womanhood.
Many men don't respect Feminists because Feminists are often angry, irrational, and misandric. This is not the fault of women. Feminism encourages this bitterness in women, by using toxic feminine traits against us. Feminism takes the worst traits of women (insecurity, fearfulness, bitterness) and uses these to fuel their movement. This is how Feminism spread in the West: by teaching women to be hateful and unhappy, rather than confident in ourselves.
A rational female is confident and believes in herself, and doesn't waste time pandering to other people's expectations.
A rational female is empowered by her womanhood, and feels happy being a woman rather than hating being a woman.
A rational female works alongside men and supports men, rather than vilifying men and seeing men as the enemy.
A rational female does not believe that women have it so much harder than men. Instead, she accepts that both men and women have problems and struggles, and that society should treat men and women with equal respect and compassion.
A rational female strives to manage and handle her emotions. She understands that her emotional temperament differs from men, and rather than punishing herself for this, she works with it and constantly grows from it. She also does not wallow in self-pity.
A rational female is NOT a 'perfect' woman. Nobody is perfect. A rational female is simply a woman who learns to be in control of herself, stands strong in what she believes in, is respectful and tolerant of people, and treats humans with respect and compassion.
All women should strive to be rational females. I aim for this everyday. I don't get it right all the time, nobody does. But that doesn't mean I don't do my best, because all we can do each day is our best. All we can aim for is to grow into the healthiest versions of ourselves, daily.
submitted by zaririi to womensadvocates [link] [comments]
I truly believe that striving to be a rational female will help women overcome much of the nonsense and indoctrination that Feminism has pushed into us over the years. I am planning on publishing a non-fiction book either end of 2023 or beginning of 2024 called The Rational Female which will serve as a good basis for this new, non-Feminist vision of womanhood.
Many men don't respect Feminists because Feminists are often angry, irrational, and misandric. This is not the fault of women. Feminism encourages this bitterness in women, by using toxic feminine traits against us. Feminism takes the worst traits of women (insecurity, fearfulness, bitterness) and uses these to fuel their movement. This is how Feminism spread in the West: by teaching women to be hateful and unhappy, rather than confident in ourselves.
A rational female is confident and believes in herself, and doesn't waste time pandering to other people's expectations.
A rational female is empowered by her womanhood, and feels happy being a woman rather than hating being a woman.
A rational female works alongside men and supports men, rather than vilifying men and seeing men as the enemy.
A rational female does not believe that women have it so much harder than men. Instead, she accepts that both men and women have problems and struggles, and that society should treat men and women with equal respect and compassion.
A rational female strives to manage and handle her emotions. She understands that her emotional temperament differs from men, and rather than punishing herself for this, she works with it and constantly grows from it. She also does not wallow in self-pity.
A rational female is NOT a 'perfect' woman. Nobody is perfect. A rational female is simply a woman who learns to be in control of herself, stands strong in what she believes in, is respectful and tolerant of people, and treats humans with respect and compassion.
All women should strive to be rational females. I aim for this everyday. I don't get it right all the time, nobody does. But that doesn't mean I don't do my best, because all we can do each day is our best. All we can aim for is to grow into the healthiest versions of ourselves, daily.
2023.05.29 17:58 TallLab1036 An in depth profile of myself.
Hello hello. I hope you enjoy this short introduction of myself.
Some have asked why I've come here to seek this, and really, why are any of us here? We're searching for something that we can't find elsewhere so we've decided to give this a shot.
I've tried other sites without luck and dating is difficult in my area. By that I mean everyone is super country, as in enjoying fishing and listening to country music while complaining about liberals. Or, to phrase it another way - guns, God and Trump. That's a hard pass for me, so this seems like the next step.
A couple of things before I start:
Distance isn't an issue for me. I'm hoping to meet someone and chat to see where things lead, if there's a connection of any sort. If there is, we can move from there. Distance is a relatively small issue if you can find someone who is truly perfect for you, after all.
I should also mention that, for the most part, age isn't an issue. To some extent it will be of course, but I don't mind a bit of an age gap in either direction at all. If it's an issue for you, that's understandable; however, if you think it will be for me, well the only way to really find out is to message me, now isn't it?
I'm open to anyone who sees this and is interested (including those of any experience level) as I don't want to limit myself when I could possibly find chemistry with someone.
Also, while I am in general an emotionally intelligent, nurturing and supportive person, I'm also a massive sadist. To be more specific, I enjoy psychological sadism (although physical sadism is definitely fun too) and that is reflected in my kinks and, to some extent, my personality. While I believe boundaries and limits are to be respected at all times, and I don't enjoy anything if my partner doesn't, I absolutely love teasing, tormenting and torturing my partner in both play and everyday life.
Prepare for a mountain of text! It's a bit long, but I assure you it's worth the read. I decided that since I'm putting myself out there with a post, I want to truly and fully put myself out there and represent myself. I'm hoping that those reading this will recognize the effort that was put into this and get a good feel for who I am as a person. If you feel it's too much, save it for later, skim or even just message me if you would rather get to know me more naturally.
My post is cobbled together from thoughts, beliefs and realizations that I have come upon in my years in the lifestyle (which is why you might see slightly different styles of writing in different parts, this post is taken from my kink profiles and are the sum result of over ten years of experience that I find I still add to every now and then. I try to edit and organize it a bit from time to time, but it's difficult due to the fact that there's so much that I wish to include.)
Long story short, I can be a bit...rambly, sometimes. So apologies in advance for that, although I have recently made great strides in editing my post. So I've got that going for me, which is nice.
While it's certainly a lengthy read, it's not nearly as bad as it seems. I recommend reading the whole thing (obviously since I wrote it), especially if you're interested in getting to know a kinky, geeky and empathetic person.
Now that I've covered that, it's time to get to the part you've been waiting for.
I'm a lighthearted, playful and fairly laid back, yet somewhat serious minded, person who's rather upbeat and probably too curious for his own good. I'm also kind, caring, friendly, sometimes cynical and often sarcastic (although in a lighthearted manner, and never at the expense of others.) There's nothing I love to do more than laugh; I love most things involving humor, although I do believe there's a very fine line between hilarity and stupidity.
Now, for some little bits of trivia about me:
Some bands I enjoy include:
While I enjoy relaxing and watching television, I have trouble watching hour long shows as I can only focus on it for so long before my attention wavers, around that time I start looking at my phone and just waiting for it to be over. It's also why I don't watch too many movies; I need my entertainment bite sized. I'll watch movies every once in a while, but they generally need to be 100 minutes tops (unless it's something I'm super into.).
I have difficulty getting into things that are realistic; they usually need to be fantastical in nature and capture my imagination. My preferred genres are comedy, horror (mainly supernatural, no slashers) and most things involving special powers or abilities, however I can sometimes get into action or drama as well. I also have a love for the world of animation, possibly because they tend to be more creative and aren't limited by reality; it's part of why I'm so partial to anime.
Some shows that I'm fond of are:
Gaming is easily one of my biggest hobbies and has been for many, many years now. I see it as an art form, as a way to tell a story that you can deeply immerse yourself in and get pulled into, something that can captivate you and make you lose all track of time because it's simply so engrossing. It's also a damn good way to have fun and kill time, especially when you're playing with friends. It's a big part of my life and something I have spent quite a bit of time and money on. Some people may be put off by this, but it a part of me that I will not deny or hide; after all, if someone has an issue with that then how compatible could we possibly be?
Some video games that hold a special place in my heart are:
Some board games that I love are:
Bring up video/board/tabletop games, super powers, comics, cartoons, anime, manga, sci-fi, fantasy or technology and I'll happily chat your ear off. I'm quite social and love to talk, however I'm also an introvert so there are plenty of times where the pressure of constant social interactions with others gets to me and I need to take some time to myself to mentally recharge.
As I mentioned, I absolutely adore animals. Seriously, if you want to make me hate a bad guy, have him hurt an animal. Ironically, I'm practically a carnivore. I'm convinced that I would starve if I had to hunt for my own food just because I couldn't bring myself to hurt them.
Speaking of food, I'm a bit of a foodie (I dislike that word, but it's accurate.) I'm all about sauces, seasonings and spices, not to mention a love for anything deep fried. I love experiencing different tastes and textures while trying new things...as long as they're not vegetables. No veggies, except corn and potatoes; those two get a pass as they're amazing. I also enjoy onions and peppers in small quantities in dishes.
I've got a nice guy next door look in that I have no tattoos or piercings, have glasses, stay clean shaven and have a bit of a baby face (as in I look rather young, I often get mistaken for being in my mid 20's). I wouldn't say that with my look I would be called handsome, sexy or hot (however I am often called cute (I've also been called handsome a fair amount, it still feels weird though.) I'm also rather pale due to the fact that I stay indoors most of the time (if you can't tell from that, I'm white.) Because of my appearance, and my friendly and laid back nature, people tend to view me as rather innocent. I suppose that isn't entirely incorrect though, I'll admit that I can be a bit naive at times in regards to people and the world.
As for politics and religion, I tend to try to stay away from both.
While I believe I'm somewhat in the middle for the former, as I have views from both sides, if I had to choose I'd say I definitely lean way more towards the left. I believe in the greater good, the needs of the many over the needs of the few, in advancing science and finding alternative fuels and materials that don't pollute or destroy our environment in the process, in trying to create a brighter future, etc, etc. I'm definitely not on the far left however, and hate social justice and cancel culture. I'm empathetic and all, but people need to stop getting offended by every tiny thIng and creating problems that don't exist. That's definitely not exclusive to the left, the right is very guilty of it as well.
For the latter, I generally just consider myself not religious as I don't think or care about it too much. If I had to classify it though I'd say I'm agnostic. This means that, while I don't believe in any god or gods, I acknowledge that they might exist. While I'm 99.3̅3̅3̅% certain that there is no grand creator or afterlife, there's no real way we can know for certain. We're a very young and ignorant species, there's much about life and the universe that we are unaware of or don't understand yet.
I just try to focus on being a good person and doing right by others, not for some earthly or heavenly reward, or for a smug sense of self satisfaction, but because it's simply what I want to do. It's who I am and what makes me feel good about myself.
I try my best to live by The Golden Rule (also known as treat others you the way you wish to be treated or do unto others as you would have them do unto you), being guided by own moral compass that directs me in how I interact with others. I always do my very best to make others feel wanted, cared for, appreciated and understood, to give them validation; I never want anyone to feel left out or unwanted, for any reason at all. Perhaps it's from my own difficult childhood, since I felt that way when I was young and don't want others to go through the same things that I did. Whatever the reason, whenever I say or do anything I tend to, without even realizing it, think about how it will affect the other person and the different ways that it could be taken. I strive to treat others with the courtesy and respect that I believe that they deserve.
As I mentioned, I have a strong moral compass. The only problem is, this is true North for my compass; I feel that's the correct way to treat and interact with others, and I believe that's what everyone should do. So when other people don't act in the way that I believe they should, even though I know everyone is different and everyone has different thoughts, feelings and experiences that led them to those (we are the product of our environments after all), it can bother me. I've come to realize that this is due to holding myself to extremely high standards, and often holding other people to the same standards to which I hold myself.
Unfortunately, that can lead to conflicts with others, sometimes over things that they might feel to be insignificant. It doesn't happen very often though as I can recognize whether something is actually a big deal or not and put it to the back of my mind; I wouldn't be a very good friend or partner if I nitpicked over every little thing, now would I? Despite being very much driven by my moral compass, I'm also calm, collected, understanding and logical by nature.
I've realized that I used to put a lot of pressure on myself when interacting with others, trying to be funny and entertaining, overall trying to make sure that they were having a good time and enjoying themselves. If, for whatever reason, I felt that they were bored I ended up trying even harder to keep them engaged and joyful. It was somewhat of a bad habit of mine; I suppose I just felt like I had a personal stake in everyone that I interacted with, a responsibility almost, and didn't want to leave them wanting. I still do this to some extent, but not as much as I used to; as I've grown and matured, and my anxiety has lessened, I've learned to pull back a bit and that I don't need to carry everyone's burden on my shoulders. I still wish to keep people engaged and happy, and still take on more responsibility than I probably should, however I imagine that I'll always be that way; it's just in my nature.
I'm an emotionally intelligent and extremely empathetic person who's well aware of his inner workings due to my introspective nature. I'm easily able to see things from multiple perspectives, which I believe is because of how I process empathy. I don't necessarily feel the exact pain of others, but I mirror it; it's second nature for me to put myself in their position which allows me to understand the plethora of ways they can think and feel. This is something that is a core part of who I am and that I take great pride in.
I feel deeply, which can lead to me taking things to heart and sometimes reading too much into things or overanalyzing them. Thankfully, due to my great experience in emotional control and regulation (which I'm about to go into), I'm generally able to take a step back from my emotions and understand the intent and meaning behind words and actions so there's less of a chance of misunderstanding.
Because I feel so deeply, that caused problems for me when I was younger. My emotions were a swirling vortex, out of control and ready to burst out at any second. Puberty certainly didn't make this any easier either.
It's been said that our personal identity is 80% environmental and 20% genetic. While I might be genetically predispositioned to feeling so deeply, a lot of it likely comes from traumas experienced in childhood and my inability to process them properly. They left scars that I'm still dealing with today, and as a result of said scars, growing up I was diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, depression and OCD, on top of the ADHD that I already had. However, I'm thankfully in a very good place thanks to a combination of past therapy, current medication and constant reflection.
I've done a lot of work to be able to get a handle on my emotions. Because I got used to having them under such control, I've been told that at times I can come across as kind of indifferent or hard to read. That's one of the reasons that I'm such an upfront, open, honest and expressive person; I want people to be able to understand me and I generally tell exactly what I'm thinking or how something makes me feel so that others can do that.
Honestly, one of my biggest fears is that no one will ever be able to understand me like I understand myself. It's right up there with a fear of the unknown (one is the reasons I don't do deep water, I don't want to fuck with any Cthulhu monsters that are down there) and losing my memories, as in the end we're just a sum of our memories and I don't want to lose who I am.
I never claimed to be perfect; I have my flaws as well, and try to work on them every day to improve myself as a person. Since I've already put so much of myself into my profile, I thought that it was only right to put the negative parts in as well.
While some of these things could certainly be considered negative traits, I believe that they help make me the Dom that I am. Because I AM so compassionate, because I AM so empathetic, because I HAVE been through so much and still keep going, I feel that I can give a sub or a slave what she truly needs to thrive in her environment. Feel free to read more about that below.
When you combine that with my nurturing and empathetic nature this type of relationship is the natural choice for me (more on that next). I believe that's also why I find myself naturally drawn to the weak, the helpless and the damaged. I have an overwhelming desire to heal them, to help and protect them while nurturing them and watching them grow into who I know they can be, which goes with what I was saying before.
A sub knows that her Dom loves her unconditionally and only wants what is best for her. While I do certainly enjoy doing this, I primarily do this to help my sub above all else. I'm a nurturing soul who wishes nothing more than to protect his partner. To take care of her and help her when she needs it. To be her support and her life line. To give her the guidance, structure and discipline she needs to feel fulfilled in life. To set rules and guidelines so that she can move freely within those set limits and be happy. To help her decide what is best for her when she herself doesn't know. To provide the security and comfort of knowing that she is being taken care of and that she has someone she can talk to about anything without any sort of judgment or prejudice. I want her to thrive and become the person that she was always meant to be. I enjoy pushing my sub to explore her boundaries and limits, within reason of course. I simply wish to see her flourish and blossom, to help her become what I know she can be and reach higher plateaus.
I realize the previous paragraphs could sound condescending in some ways, however that couldn't be further from the truth. I see my partner as an equal, someone who simply has different needs that I can fulfill so that they can live a fulfilling life themselves, and in turn by fulfilling those needs of theirs, I feel fulfilled as well. We ultimately form a symbiotic relationship of sorts.
Make no mistake, I have no desire to micromanage every tiny detail of my sub's life, nor form a codependent relationship where she's entirely reliant upon me for her mental and emotional needs. The level and extent of the D/s relationship is decided after long discussion and input from both parties.
Some believe that being a Dom is just telling people what to do and getting what you want while getting off, but it's so much more than that. It's not as easy or simple as it appears, you must always keep what is best for your sub in mind, even if it conflicts with your own immediate or future interests. You must constantly be aware of her needs and desires while providing checks and balances to help her live a life worth living. Anyone can simply give a sub what she wants, it takes a true Dom to say no because you feel that is what is best for her.
At least that's how it should be. There are so many "Doms" out there that don't care about their subs at all, only themselves. They don't care if they're suffering physically or emotionally, they simply use them as toys they can play with and then toss aside when they're bored; they abuse them and hurt them simply because they get a kick out of it. A real Dom/sub relationship is a very special and strong bond, much more so than a vanilla relationship in my opinion. So many people seem to have issues understanding that unfortunately, there's a certain stigma associated with this and preconceptions are formed before they even learn anything about it.
Truthfully, I believe the sub holds the power in the relationship in many ways. She is the one that is choosing to submit after all, to give up her power and control to the Dom. Despite that, she is the one that has control over the power of safe words, that can stop an activity with a single utterance. Her subservience is completely voluntary, something that many people don't seem to think about. It's not simply about someone bossing someone around because they can, it's about someone choosing a partner that they feel is worthy to give their all to.
While the following is my ideal, as I said at the beginning, I'm open to talking to anyone that reads this. However, I'm not particularly interested in "littles" or "brats".
Ideally my partner would be what is typically called an adult babygirl, and I'd like to elaborate on that term since some might not be familiar with it. Essentially it's someone who enjoys the nurturing, loving and structured aspect of a Daddy Dom or DD/lg relationship but isn't a little themselves; meaning that they don't have a mental age that they regress to, among other things. (I don't identify as a Daddy myself, however due to my protective and supportive/nurturing nature you could say I'm Daddy leaning.)
Some people have their entire lives revolve around the lifestyle, going to munches, conventions, parties and attempting to reach out to their community and find a place to belong. That might work for them, but it's of no interest to me. While I'm certainly not opposed to chatting and making friends and connections, I have no desire to be a part of a community. I'm simply seeking one whose ideas and beliefs line up with my own for a symbiotic relationship as I mentioned before
If I had to describe such a relationship, it would definitely be on the lighter side of the spectrum in regards to what daily life would be like. I'm seeking a 24/7 TPE, however I also enjoy being casual with my sub. Perhaps in some ways it's more similar to a vanilla relationship with strong Dom/sub undertones than a typical BDSM relationship.
In my perfect situation, we would still be able to joke around, have fun and be very close and romantic; however there is also the constant understanding that I am in charge, and what I say goes. No matter how much fun we may be having or what we might be doing, she should always know her place, even if it's only in the back of her mind. There are rules in place for her benefit, and if she breaks those rules she will be punished.
By what I say goes, I mean I have the final say in subjects because, as a submissive, she has given the reins of power over to me. She trusts me to make her decisions for her and to do what is best for her, to take care of and protect her. I'm never the type to say "this is how it's going to be, I don't care what you want, end of discussion" as discourse is the only way two people can truly understand one another. I always value my submissive's input and always want her to give her opinion and speak her mind if something is bothering her.
My ideal sub would be one that is loyal and devoted above all else, but also one who is looking for a Dom she can actually have a connection with. One that, not necessarily needs, but craves guidance, support, structure and discipline in their life; whose life does not feel complete without this, like there is a void deep inside her that cannot be filled unless she has a Dom to guide and take care of her, that she can in turn make happy and serve to the best of her ability.
Beyond anything else though, I want to like them as a person before I love them as a sub. My perfect partner would be someone who is intelligent, kind-hearted, earnest, funny and a has a fair touch of dorkiness in her. I want her to be someone that actually has personality, that I can laugh with and talk to for hours upon hours on end and still hate the thought of leaving. Someone that will either indulge my love of games and geekery or join me because she's just as much of a fan of those things as I am. Someone who loves how I tease and torment her, keeping her on the edge and revelling in the pleasure I get from watching her squirm.
One thing to note is that just because I am very friendly (sometimes people are surprised when I begin acting more Dominant, others aren't as they say they can "sense it in the way I present myself", even while being friendly and joking around) doesn't mean that I'm not strict when I have to be. I have no problem at all with enforcing rules and giving out punishments, although it's certainly not my favorite aspect of the relationship. I would prefer to reward, encourage and nurture my sub, however there are times when discipline is necessary; if one feels the need to act up, one must be ready accept the consequences after all.
If I had to describe my style of dominance, or what makes me dominant, I suppose that would be a little tricky. I don't feel the need to control everything, nor do I attempt to, and I have no problem with kicking back and letting others take the reigns in everyday situations if I feel they're more qualified or I just plain don't feel like it. Nor am I the type that "oozes" dominance, I don't care for confrontation and am a very easy going, go with the flow person. What I believe it boils down to is I simply feel comfortable with power and, quite frankly, enjoy it. I bear the burden of leadership well, it comes naturally to me and I thrive when I have the weight of another's life on my shoulders; I have little trouble making hard decisions when I need to. It also helps that my sexual inclinations line up with this nicely. If it doesn't last quite some time and doesn't end with both parties panting and soaked in sweat, I'm not particularly interested in it.
On that note, I have quite the kinky side despite my friendly and charming exterior. I suppose I should list it here because, while certainly not the primary focus of my interest in this, sexual compatibility does factor in to some extent.
My kinks are:
I also believe very strongly in aftercare and safe words as the mental and emotional well being of my partner is very important.
I realize there's no one way to live this lifestyle, but I feel like a lot of what I said should be obvious and general knowledge in regards to this; however from my experience it doesn't seem to be that way too often (not referring to the that are inexperienced in this, more those that do this for the wrong reason), which is why I wanted to share my views in such detail.
I feel like I've rambled on enough already and am dangerously close to having a TL;DR (yeah, I hit that ages ago), so I'll just say that if you're interested in learning more about me and getting to know me, you can give me a message and we'll see where things go. I like to get to know people naturally, just talk with them and see where things lead, whether that be a short chat, a simple friendship or something more. It seems silly to have expectations when you don't even know the person or how you'll get along.
Even if you're nervous or anxious, you think you might not be good enough, doubt my intentions or anything along those lines, still give me a message. After all, what do you have to lose?
Thanks for taking the time to read my little novella, I hope to hear from you soon. So long, and thanks for reading!
submitted by TallLab1036 to u/TallLab1036 [link] [comments]
Some have asked why I've come here to seek this, and really, why are any of us here? We're searching for something that we can't find elsewhere so we've decided to give this a shot.
I've tried other sites without luck and dating is difficult in my area. By that I mean everyone is super country, as in enjoying fishing and listening to country music while complaining about liberals. Or, to phrase it another way - guns, God and Trump. That's a hard pass for me, so this seems like the next step.
Distance isn't an issue for me. I'm hoping to meet someone and chat to see where things lead, if there's a connection of any sort. If there is, we can move from there. Distance is a relatively small issue if you can find someone who is truly perfect for you, after all.
I should also mention that, for the most part, age isn't an issue. To some extent it will be of course, but I don't mind a bit of an age gap in either direction at all. If it's an issue for you, that's understandable; however, if you think it will be for me, well the only way to really find out is to message me, now isn't it?
I'm open to anyone who sees this and is interested (including those of any experience level) as I don't want to limit myself when I could possibly find chemistry with someone.
Also, while I am in general an emotionally intelligent, nurturing and supportive person, I'm also a massive sadist. To be more specific, I enjoy psychological sadism (although physical sadism is definitely fun too) and that is reflected in my kinks and, to some extent, my personality. While I believe boundaries and limits are to be respected at all times, and I don't enjoy anything if my partner doesn't, I absolutely love teasing, tormenting and torturing my partner in both play and everyday life.
My post is cobbled together from thoughts, beliefs and realizations that I have come upon in my years in the lifestyle (which is why you might see slightly different styles of writing in different parts, this post is taken from my kink profiles and are the sum result of over ten years of experience that I find I still add to every now and then. I try to edit and organize it a bit from time to time, but it's difficult due to the fact that there's so much that I wish to include.)
Long story short, I can be a bit...rambly, sometimes. So apologies in advance for that, although I have recently made great strides in editing my post. So I've got that going for me, which is nice.
While it's certainly a lengthy read, it's not nearly as bad as it seems. I recommend reading the whole thing (obviously since I wrote it), especially if you're interested in getting to know a kinky, geeky and empathetic person.
Now that I've covered that, it's time to get to the part you've been waiting for.
About me:
I decided to put this part first because I believe that, above all else, the people involved should connect on a personal level and "click", if you will. This tells about who I am and my hobbies and such. If someone can't accept this part of me, how could we possibly get along?I'm a lighthearted, playful and fairly laid back, yet somewhat serious minded, person who's rather upbeat and probably too curious for his own good. I'm also kind, caring, friendly, sometimes cynical and often sarcastic (although in a lighthearted manner, and never at the expense of others.) There's nothing I love to do more than laugh; I love most things involving humor, although I do believe there's a very fine line between hilarity and stupidity.
Now, for some little bits of trivia about me:
- According to the Myers-Briggs system, I'm an INFP. Online tests can give you an idea of where to start, but they're not that reliable and the results can change depending on your mood that day. To truly discover your type requires self-reflection to learn about your cognitive functions, and while doing so I learned a lot about myself. I don't follow it religiously, but I believe there are some elements of truth to it.
- I'm definitely a Type B Personality.
- I'm a hopeless romantic, an old soul who's young at heart, a cynical optimist and a realistic dreamer.
- I'm definitely that type that believes in better safe than sorry, and one of my mottos is "Hope for the best, prepare for the worst." I also tend to do copious amounts of research before any big decision.
- I consider myself to be a very grounded, down to earth and genuine person.
- I'm extremely friendly and believe in treating others with the same respect that you would like to receive and generally try to do what I feel is "right" by others (more on that in a bit.)
- I like to believe in the best of human nature, although I seem to be let down a fair bit. Even so, I don't want to let that stop me.
- I have very strong values and ideals, and an even stronger moral compass.
- I believe people are free to do and believe what they want, so long as they don't harm themselves, harm, cause trouble for or inconvenience others, or attempt to force those beliefs on others.
- I believe that a life lived for others is the only life worth living.
- I believe that there's no point in worrying about things that you can't change. If you let yourself get dragged down by it and obsess over it, you'll find yourself crushed under the weight of all the injustices in the world.
- I've been told (rather often actually) that I have a very nice voice, frequently being told that I should go into radio or be an announcer of some kind. I'm very expressive and my voice reflects that, having lots of highs and lows. Truthfully, I believe it's one of my better features.
- I much prefer talking to typing in general, especially when first getting to know someone as you get a much better idea of their personality. Also, I feel like I come across kind of...stiff in my writing style when that's very much not me, so voice allows me to showcase my truest self.
- I tend to be a confidant of sorts; due to my open and genuine nature and what I've been told is a welcoming...aura, I suppose, people tend to find me easy to talk to and trust, coming to me to confide things and seek out advice. This is something that brings me great happiness and pride as having the trust of others is important to me.
- Promises are very important to me; once I give my word in regards to something I'll keep it, even if I don't particularly want to. As cheesy as it might sound, to me my word is my bond.
- Admittedly, subtlety is not one of my strong points. I'm a very open, upfront and honest person. I'm terrible at lying (I hate doing it and I just give away that I am) and can't keep a straight face to save my life. If I were an actor, I would probably be Jimmy Fallon.
- I welcome people to give me constructive criticism and feedback as I'm constantly looking to improve myself. Yes, that even includes those that message me saying my post is far too long.
- I can't fake a smile to save my life, it has to be genuine for me. One of the many reasons I hate having photos taken of me.
- I find intelligence, humor and kindness to be the most desirable traits in a partner (although being easy on the eyes doesn't hurt.)
- My senses are all very sensitive, and can sometimes overwhelm me when I'm introduced to new stimuli.
- I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to too. Wait, I'm just kidding, just wanted to throw a little Mitch Hedberg in here. I don't drink, smoke or do drugs. While I have no issue with those who drink, I do tend to avoid smokers and hardcore drug users.
- Despite what the length of my post may say about me, I absolutely hate writing.
- I enjoy visiting places but hate the actual traveling (which is one of the reasons why if I could have one power it would be teleportation [actually if I could have one power it would be the ability to manipulate space and time, however for simplicity's sake I'm just going to say teleportation for now {not Star Trek teleportation though, fuck that.}])
- I hate waiting and I hate making others wait.
- I love the symbolism of trees and what they represent: strength, vitality, protection.
- If I had to rank the seven deadly sins in the order that I'm guilty of from most to least, it would go: Gluttony, Pride, Sloth, Lust, Envy, Greed and Wrath.
- If I were to list the Magic the Gathering colors that I most identify with from most to least, it would go: White, Blue, Green, Red and then Black.
- Growing up I was all about DBZ, Dinosaurs, Gargoyles, Ghostbusters, Ninja Turtles, Pokémon, Power Rangers, Spider-Man & X-Men.
- I absolutely love animals and have two cats of my own, Ivy and Jasmine (there are wonderful stories behind both names), that I love to death. I probably talk to them like people a bit too much.
- I spend far more time living in my head than I should.
- I firmly believe that breakfast offers the best food. I could eat waffles everyday.
- I call Gatorade by their flavors as opposed to their colors.
- I absolutely love when I'm thirsty and soda burns my throat.
- You won't catch me running unless something is chasing me. Partially because I have asthma, but mostly because running is awful.
Some bands I enjoy include:
Adelitas Way, Amaranthe, Breaking Benjamin, Disturbed, Evans Blue, Five Finger Death Punch, Gemini Syndrome, Otherwise, Pop Evil, Sevendust, Shinedown, Shaman's Harvest, State of Mine, Theory of a Deadman, Three Days Grace (before Adam Gontier left)I enjoy other types of music as well, for example another band I like is Bowling for Soup as I love their sense of humor; it's great to see people not taking music so seriously. I'm also a fan of big band music, which I actually have Fallout 3 to thank for. I enjoy classical musical as well and, despite having no real knowledge of it and most of it sounding the same, I find it incredibly relaxing and peaceful.
While I enjoy relaxing and watching television, I have trouble watching hour long shows as I can only focus on it for so long before my attention wavers, around that time I start looking at my phone and just waiting for it to be over. It's also why I don't watch too many movies; I need my entertainment bite sized. I'll watch movies every once in a while, but they generally need to be 100 minutes tops (unless it's something I'm super into.).
I have difficulty getting into things that are realistic; they usually need to be fantastical in nature and capture my imagination. My preferred genres are comedy, horror (mainly supernatural, no slashers) and most things involving special powers or abilities, however I can sometimes get into action or drama as well. I also have a love for the world of animation, possibly because they tend to be more creative and aren't limited by reality; it's part of why I'm so partial to anime.
Some shows that I'm fond of are:
Animation: Adventure Time, American Dad, Archer, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Bob's Burgers, Bojack Horseman, [China, IL], Disenchantment, Futurama, HarmonQuest, Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law, King of the Hill, Metalocalypse, Mike Tyson Mysteries, Mr. Pickles, Rick and Morty, Robot Chicken, South Park, Superjail, Ugly Americans, Venture Bros.I definitely binge my shows, I like to wait for a season (or preferably an entire series) to be done before I jump into it. I'm also the type that's fine watching something just once. If I ever feel the need to watch it again it will be many, many years later. This extends to games as well, I generally need things with replayability such as MOBA's or Rogue-likes.
Live-action: Arrested Development, Better Call Saul, Breaking Bad, Carnivàle, Dexter, Eureka, Friends, Game of Thrones, The Good Place, House, The Lost Room, Monk, The Muppets (2015 series), The Office, Parks and Rec, Psych, Stargate, Stranger Things, Walking Dead, Warehouse 13, Wilfred
Gaming is easily one of my biggest hobbies and has been for many, many years now. I see it as an art form, as a way to tell a story that you can deeply immerse yourself in and get pulled into, something that can captivate you and make you lose all track of time because it's simply so engrossing. It's also a damn good way to have fun and kill time, especially when you're playing with friends. It's a big part of my life and something I have spent quite a bit of time and money on. Some people may be put off by this, but it a part of me that I will not deny or hide; after all, if someone has an issue with that then how compatible could we possibly be?
Some video games that hold a special place in my heart are:
Action/Adventure: Alan Wake, Assassin's Creed, Bastion, Batman: Arkham Asylum, Bayonetta, Brütal Legend, Bully, Darksiders, Dark Souls (first one), Deadly Premonition, Dead Space, Devil May Cry (3 & 5), Enslaved: Odyssey to the West, Heavy Rain, Hellblade, Infamous, Last of Us, Legend of Zelda (A Link to the Past, Ocarina of Time, Majora's Mask, Wind Waker), Luigi's Mansion, Metal Gear Solid (Twin Snakes, 3, 4 & 5), Ninja Gaiden (2004), Overlord, Phantom Crash, Resident Evil 2 remake, Saint's Row 2, The Saboteur, TMNT: Turtles in TimeNot only that, but I've also gotten into tabletop gaming, including both board and pen and paper games (such as Dungeons and Dragons.) I initially got into the latter as an exercise to strengthen my creative muscles but found it was a fun way to goof off with friends. For the former, it's almost gotten to the point that I enjoy them more than most video games as it provides an experience that you don't get anymore; friends gathered around and competing against one another or cooperating against a common foe, something that's disappeared with the advent of the internet.
Fighting: Anarchy Reigns, Blazblue (series), DBZ: Budokai, Dragon Ball Fighterz, Marvel vs Capcom (2 & 3), Mortal Kombat (9 & 11), Soul Calibur 3, Super Smash Bros. Melee
MOBA: Dota 2, Guardians of Middle Earth, Heroes of the Storm
Rogue-like: Binding of Isaac, Crypt of the Necrodancer, Darkest Dungeon, Dead Cells, Don't Starve, FTL, Monster Train, Slay the Spire
RPG: Bravely Default, Dragon Age (Origins and Inquisition), Dragon's Dogma, Elder Scrolls (Oblivion and Skyrim), Fable (1 & 2), Fallout (3 & New Vegas), Final Fantasy (IX, X & Tactics Advance), Grim Dawn, Mass Effect 2, Pillars of Eternity (series), Pokémon (Red, Blue, Yellow, Gold, Silver & Stadium), Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, Suikoden 2, Tyranny, The Witcher (2 & 3)
Shooter: Bioshock (series), Battlefield Bad Company (1 & 2), The Darkness, Deep Rock Galactic, Gears of War (1 & 3), Left 4 Dead, Shadowrun (2007 FPS), Team Fortress 2 (when it first came out, it's a little much now), Vanquish
Simulation: Animal Crossing (first one), Doki Doki Literature Club, Harvest Moon, Life is Strange, Pokémon Snap, Tabletop Simulator
Strategy: Civilization (3 & 4), Endless Legend, Magic the Gathering: Duels of the Planeswalkers (2012 & 2013), Portal, Star Wars: Galactic Battlegrounds, Warcraft 3
Some board games that I love are:
BANG! The Dice Game, Dead of Winter, Dice Throne, Epic Spell Wars, King of New York, Lords of Waterdeep, Munchkin, Pandemic, Red Dragon InnI enjoy reading as well, although I find it difficult to find a book that can keep my focus and really draw me in like I crave. I'm constantly on the prowl for new material, and my favorite genres would probably be apocalyptic/post-apocalyptic, dystopian, horror and dark fantasy/grimdark, although I'm certainly in the market for something that has a good element of humor to it as well. If you have any recommendations, I'd absolutely love to hear them!
Bring up video/board/tabletop games, super powers, comics, cartoons, anime, manga, sci-fi, fantasy or technology and I'll happily chat your ear off. I'm quite social and love to talk, however I'm also an introvert so there are plenty of times where the pressure of constant social interactions with others gets to me and I need to take some time to myself to mentally recharge.
As I mentioned, I absolutely adore animals. Seriously, if you want to make me hate a bad guy, have him hurt an animal. Ironically, I'm practically a carnivore. I'm convinced that I would starve if I had to hunt for my own food just because I couldn't bring myself to hurt them.
Speaking of food, I'm a bit of a foodie (I dislike that word, but it's accurate.) I'm all about sauces, seasonings and spices, not to mention a love for anything deep fried. I love experiencing different tastes and textures while trying new things...as long as they're not vegetables. No veggies, except corn and potatoes; those two get a pass as they're amazing. I also enjoy onions and peppers in small quantities in dishes.
I've got a nice guy next door look in that I have no tattoos or piercings, have glasses, stay clean shaven and have a bit of a baby face (as in I look rather young, I often get mistaken for being in my mid 20's). I wouldn't say that with my look I would be called handsome, sexy or hot (however I am often called cute (I've also been called handsome a fair amount, it still feels weird though.) I'm also rather pale due to the fact that I stay indoors most of the time (if you can't tell from that, I'm white.) Because of my appearance, and my friendly and laid back nature, people tend to view me as rather innocent. I suppose that isn't entirely incorrect though, I'll admit that I can be a bit naive at times in regards to people and the world.
As for politics and religion, I tend to try to stay away from both.
While I believe I'm somewhat in the middle for the former, as I have views from both sides, if I had to choose I'd say I definitely lean way more towards the left. I believe in the greater good, the needs of the many over the needs of the few, in advancing science and finding alternative fuels and materials that don't pollute or destroy our environment in the process, in trying to create a brighter future, etc, etc. I'm definitely not on the far left however, and hate social justice and cancel culture. I'm empathetic and all, but people need to stop getting offended by every tiny thIng and creating problems that don't exist. That's definitely not exclusive to the left, the right is very guilty of it as well.
For the latter, I generally just consider myself not religious as I don't think or care about it too much. If I had to classify it though I'd say I'm agnostic. This means that, while I don't believe in any god or gods, I acknowledge that they might exist. While I'm 99.3̅3̅3̅% certain that there is no grand creator or afterlife, there's no real way we can know for certain. We're a very young and ignorant species, there's much about life and the universe that we are unaware of or don't understand yet.
I just try to focus on being a good person and doing right by others, not for some earthly or heavenly reward, or for a smug sense of self satisfaction, but because it's simply what I want to do. It's who I am and what makes me feel good about myself.
I try my best to live by The Golden Rule (also known as treat others you the way you wish to be treated or do unto others as you would have them do unto you), being guided by own moral compass that directs me in how I interact with others. I always do my very best to make others feel wanted, cared for, appreciated and understood, to give them validation; I never want anyone to feel left out or unwanted, for any reason at all. Perhaps it's from my own difficult childhood, since I felt that way when I was young and don't want others to go through the same things that I did. Whatever the reason, whenever I say or do anything I tend to, without even realizing it, think about how it will affect the other person and the different ways that it could be taken. I strive to treat others with the courtesy and respect that I believe that they deserve.
As I mentioned, I have a strong moral compass. The only problem is, this is true North for my compass; I feel that's the correct way to treat and interact with others, and I believe that's what everyone should do. So when other people don't act in the way that I believe they should, even though I know everyone is different and everyone has different thoughts, feelings and experiences that led them to those (we are the product of our environments after all), it can bother me. I've come to realize that this is due to holding myself to extremely high standards, and often holding other people to the same standards to which I hold myself.
Unfortunately, that can lead to conflicts with others, sometimes over things that they might feel to be insignificant. It doesn't happen very often though as I can recognize whether something is actually a big deal or not and put it to the back of my mind; I wouldn't be a very good friend or partner if I nitpicked over every little thing, now would I? Despite being very much driven by my moral compass, I'm also calm, collected, understanding and logical by nature.
I've realized that I used to put a lot of pressure on myself when interacting with others, trying to be funny and entertaining, overall trying to make sure that they were having a good time and enjoying themselves. If, for whatever reason, I felt that they were bored I ended up trying even harder to keep them engaged and joyful. It was somewhat of a bad habit of mine; I suppose I just felt like I had a personal stake in everyone that I interacted with, a responsibility almost, and didn't want to leave them wanting. I still do this to some extent, but not as much as I used to; as I've grown and matured, and my anxiety has lessened, I've learned to pull back a bit and that I don't need to carry everyone's burden on my shoulders. I still wish to keep people engaged and happy, and still take on more responsibility than I probably should, however I imagine that I'll always be that way; it's just in my nature.
I'm an emotionally intelligent and extremely empathetic person who's well aware of his inner workings due to my introspective nature. I'm easily able to see things from multiple perspectives, which I believe is because of how I process empathy. I don't necessarily feel the exact pain of others, but I mirror it; it's second nature for me to put myself in their position which allows me to understand the plethora of ways they can think and feel. This is something that is a core part of who I am and that I take great pride in.
I feel deeply, which can lead to me taking things to heart and sometimes reading too much into things or overanalyzing them. Thankfully, due to my great experience in emotional control and regulation (which I'm about to go into), I'm generally able to take a step back from my emotions and understand the intent and meaning behind words and actions so there's less of a chance of misunderstanding.
Because I feel so deeply, that caused problems for me when I was younger. My emotions were a swirling vortex, out of control and ready to burst out at any second. Puberty certainly didn't make this any easier either.
It's been said that our personal identity is 80% environmental and 20% genetic. While I might be genetically predispositioned to feeling so deeply, a lot of it likely comes from traumas experienced in childhood and my inability to process them properly. They left scars that I'm still dealing with today, and as a result of said scars, growing up I was diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, depression and OCD, on top of the ADHD that I already had. However, I'm thankfully in a very good place thanks to a combination of past therapy, current medication and constant reflection.
I've done a lot of work to be able to get a handle on my emotions. Because I got used to having them under such control, I've been told that at times I can come across as kind of indifferent or hard to read. That's one of the reasons that I'm such an upfront, open, honest and expressive person; I want people to be able to understand me and I generally tell exactly what I'm thinking or how something makes me feel so that others can do that.
Honestly, one of my biggest fears is that no one will ever be able to understand me like I understand myself. It's right up there with a fear of the unknown (one is the reasons I don't do deep water, I don't want to fuck with any Cthulhu monsters that are down there) and losing my memories, as in the end we're just a sum of our memories and I don't want to lose who I am.
I never claimed to be perfect; I have my flaws as well, and try to work on them every day to improve myself as a person. Since I've already put so much of myself into my profile, I thought that it was only right to put the negative parts in as well.
While some of these things could certainly be considered negative traits, I believe that they help make me the Dom that I am. Because I AM so compassionate, because I AM so empathetic, because I HAVE been through so much and still keep going, I feel that I can give a sub or a slave what she truly needs to thrive in her environment. Feel free to read more about that below.
My Beliefs:
If I had to break down why this all appeals to me to one reason, to put it simply, I'd have to say that I'm the kind of person who wants to be needed. I find that, overall, I feel more driven and fulfilled if I know that I have someone that depends on me. If I have someone whose best interests I must keep in mind, who I need to protect and care for, I feel a greater sense of purpose than the humdrum rumblings of everyday life.When you combine that with my nurturing and empathetic nature this type of relationship is the natural choice for me (more on that next). I believe that's also why I find myself naturally drawn to the weak, the helpless and the damaged. I have an overwhelming desire to heal them, to help and protect them while nurturing them and watching them grow into who I know they can be, which goes with what I was saying before.
A sub knows that her Dom loves her unconditionally and only wants what is best for her. While I do certainly enjoy doing this, I primarily do this to help my sub above all else. I'm a nurturing soul who wishes nothing more than to protect his partner. To take care of her and help her when she needs it. To be her support and her life line. To give her the guidance, structure and discipline she needs to feel fulfilled in life. To set rules and guidelines so that she can move freely within those set limits and be happy. To help her decide what is best for her when she herself doesn't know. To provide the security and comfort of knowing that she is being taken care of and that she has someone she can talk to about anything without any sort of judgment or prejudice. I want her to thrive and become the person that she was always meant to be. I enjoy pushing my sub to explore her boundaries and limits, within reason of course. I simply wish to see her flourish and blossom, to help her become what I know she can be and reach higher plateaus.
I realize the previous paragraphs could sound condescending in some ways, however that couldn't be further from the truth. I see my partner as an equal, someone who simply has different needs that I can fulfill so that they can live a fulfilling life themselves, and in turn by fulfilling those needs of theirs, I feel fulfilled as well. We ultimately form a symbiotic relationship of sorts.
Make no mistake, I have no desire to micromanage every tiny detail of my sub's life, nor form a codependent relationship where she's entirely reliant upon me for her mental and emotional needs. The level and extent of the D/s relationship is decided after long discussion and input from both parties.
Some believe that being a Dom is just telling people what to do and getting what you want while getting off, but it's so much more than that. It's not as easy or simple as it appears, you must always keep what is best for your sub in mind, even if it conflicts with your own immediate or future interests. You must constantly be aware of her needs and desires while providing checks and balances to help her live a life worth living. Anyone can simply give a sub what she wants, it takes a true Dom to say no because you feel that is what is best for her.
At least that's how it should be. There are so many "Doms" out there that don't care about their subs at all, only themselves. They don't care if they're suffering physically or emotionally, they simply use them as toys they can play with and then toss aside when they're bored; they abuse them and hurt them simply because they get a kick out of it. A real Dom/sub relationship is a very special and strong bond, much more so than a vanilla relationship in my opinion. So many people seem to have issues understanding that unfortunately, there's a certain stigma associated with this and preconceptions are formed before they even learn anything about it.
Truthfully, I believe the sub holds the power in the relationship in many ways. She is the one that is choosing to submit after all, to give up her power and control to the Dom. Despite that, she is the one that has control over the power of safe words, that can stop an activity with a single utterance. Her subservience is completely voluntary, something that many people don't seem to think about. It's not simply about someone bossing someone around because they can, it's about someone choosing a partner that they feel is worthy to give their all to.
What I'm looking for:
I'm not here looking for a booty call or one night stand, but to find a potential partner in crime, possibly for life if a connection is made. More than anything, I simply wish to find someone who looks at me the way this girl looks at her prom date.While the following is my ideal, as I said at the beginning, I'm open to talking to anyone that reads this. However, I'm not particularly interested in "littles" or "brats".
Ideally my partner would be what is typically called an adult babygirl, and I'd like to elaborate on that term since some might not be familiar with it. Essentially it's someone who enjoys the nurturing, loving and structured aspect of a Daddy Dom or DD/lg relationship but isn't a little themselves; meaning that they don't have a mental age that they regress to, among other things. (I don't identify as a Daddy myself, however due to my protective and supportive/nurturing nature you could say I'm Daddy leaning.)
Some people have their entire lives revolve around the lifestyle, going to munches, conventions, parties and attempting to reach out to their community and find a place to belong. That might work for them, but it's of no interest to me. While I'm certainly not opposed to chatting and making friends and connections, I have no desire to be a part of a community. I'm simply seeking one whose ideas and beliefs line up with my own for a symbiotic relationship as I mentioned before
If I had to describe such a relationship, it would definitely be on the lighter side of the spectrum in regards to what daily life would be like. I'm seeking a 24/7 TPE, however I also enjoy being casual with my sub. Perhaps in some ways it's more similar to a vanilla relationship with strong Dom/sub undertones than a typical BDSM relationship.
In my perfect situation, we would still be able to joke around, have fun and be very close and romantic; however there is also the constant understanding that I am in charge, and what I say goes. No matter how much fun we may be having or what we might be doing, she should always know her place, even if it's only in the back of her mind. There are rules in place for her benefit, and if she breaks those rules she will be punished.
By what I say goes, I mean I have the final say in subjects because, as a submissive, she has given the reins of power over to me. She trusts me to make her decisions for her and to do what is best for her, to take care of and protect her. I'm never the type to say "this is how it's going to be, I don't care what you want, end of discussion" as discourse is the only way two people can truly understand one another. I always value my submissive's input and always want her to give her opinion and speak her mind if something is bothering her.
My ideal sub would be one that is loyal and devoted above all else, but also one who is looking for a Dom she can actually have a connection with. One that, not necessarily needs, but craves guidance, support, structure and discipline in their life; whose life does not feel complete without this, like there is a void deep inside her that cannot be filled unless she has a Dom to guide and take care of her, that she can in turn make happy and serve to the best of her ability.
Beyond anything else though, I want to like them as a person before I love them as a sub. My perfect partner would be someone who is intelligent, kind-hearted, earnest, funny and a has a fair touch of dorkiness in her. I want her to be someone that actually has personality, that I can laugh with and talk to for hours upon hours on end and still hate the thought of leaving. Someone that will either indulge my love of games and geekery or join me because she's just as much of a fan of those things as I am. Someone who loves how I tease and torment her, keeping her on the edge and revelling in the pleasure I get from watching her squirm.
One thing to note is that just because I am very friendly (sometimes people are surprised when I begin acting more Dominant, others aren't as they say they can "sense it in the way I present myself", even while being friendly and joking around) doesn't mean that I'm not strict when I have to be. I have no problem at all with enforcing rules and giving out punishments, although it's certainly not my favorite aspect of the relationship. I would prefer to reward, encourage and nurture my sub, however there are times when discipline is necessary; if one feels the need to act up, one must be ready accept the consequences after all.
If I had to describe my style of dominance, or what makes me dominant, I suppose that would be a little tricky. I don't feel the need to control everything, nor do I attempt to, and I have no problem with kicking back and letting others take the reigns in everyday situations if I feel they're more qualified or I just plain don't feel like it. Nor am I the type that "oozes" dominance, I don't care for confrontation and am a very easy going, go with the flow person. What I believe it boils down to is I simply feel comfortable with power and, quite frankly, enjoy it. I bear the burden of leadership well, it comes naturally to me and I thrive when I have the weight of another's life on my shoulders; I have little trouble making hard decisions when I need to. It also helps that my sexual inclinations line up with this nicely. If it doesn't last quite some time and doesn't end with both parties panting and soaked in sweat, I'm not particularly interested in it.
On that note, I have quite the kinky side despite my friendly and charming exterior. I suppose I should list it here because, while certainly not the primary focus of my interest in this, sexual compatibility does factor in to some extent.
My kinks are:
Anal, begging, biting, blowjobs, body worship, bondage, choking, cock worship, consensual non-consent, creampies, crying (the good kind), cumplay, deepthroating, degradation, desperation, dirty talking, face fucking, facials, free use, hair pulling, hole stretching (basically pushing my partner to her limits), humiliation, hypnosis, name calling, objectification, orgasm control (which includes edging, forced orgasms, orgasm denial and ruined orgasms), public play (in a discreet manner), slapping, spanking, spitting and teasing.One thing I feel I should mention is that the acts of degradation and humilation are limited to play time and only sexual in nature, never attacking my partner in any way.
I also believe very strongly in aftercare and safe words as the mental and emotional well being of my partner is very important.
I realize there's no one way to live this lifestyle, but I feel like a lot of what I said should be obvious and general knowledge in regards to this; however from my experience it doesn't seem to be that way too often (not referring to the that are inexperienced in this, more those that do this for the wrong reason), which is why I wanted to share my views in such detail.
Even if you're nervous or anxious, you think you might not be good enough, doubt my intentions or anything along those lines, still give me a message. After all, what do you have to lose?
Thanks for taking the time to read my little novella, I hope to hear from you soon. So long, and thanks for reading!
2023.05.29 17:57 casapulapula Fascism and its NEOCON Variants. There is an increasing crescendo of articles in the western mainstream media, as SIMPLICIUS the Thinker noted yesterday in his Substack blog, expressing alarm and despondency about signs that Ukraine is LOSING the war.
Excerpt:
"Instead of this intelligentsia asking themselves why it is possible that western mainstream media could be so thoroughly wrong and misinformed about a situation that may lead to the annihilation of the human species, a good number of this same crew rise up in earnest, Churchillian indignation (for a disproportionate number of them are British) and urge more escalation, imposition of no-fly (=massive bombing) zones, more weapons, and, in train, more economic misery for Europe, more European sucking at the tits of the US hegemon, and a more rapid descent of that hegemon in competition for influence in an increasingly multipolar world. These are clearly people who are clueless about how wars are fought and about their consequences. All they have ever known is how to kill relatively defenceless “Third World” natives in wars that the collective West still manages to lose, because not-winning is vital to the political economy of the western armaments industry. These are the proponents of what we can call neocon fascism: they serve the interests of the mainly white plutocratic elites and their pawns in the political and corporate domains; they are prepared to sacrifice hundreds of thousands of lives in the name of a fake principle, that of NATO’s “right” to expand (a mechanism for converting new members to NATO military requirements which convenienty align with the products of western arms manufacturers).
https://oliverboydbarrett.substack.com/p/fascism-and-its-neocon-variants
submitted by casapulapula to antiwar [link] [comments]
"Instead of this intelligentsia asking themselves why it is possible that western mainstream media could be so thoroughly wrong and misinformed about a situation that may lead to the annihilation of the human species, a good number of this same crew rise up in earnest, Churchillian indignation (for a disproportionate number of them are British) and urge more escalation, imposition of no-fly (=massive bombing) zones, more weapons, and, in train, more economic misery for Europe, more European sucking at the tits of the US hegemon, and a more rapid descent of that hegemon in competition for influence in an increasingly multipolar world. These are clearly people who are clueless about how wars are fought and about their consequences. All they have ever known is how to kill relatively defenceless “Third World” natives in wars that the collective West still manages to lose, because not-winning is vital to the political economy of the western armaments industry. These are the proponents of what we can call neocon fascism: they serve the interests of the mainly white plutocratic elites and their pawns in the political and corporate domains; they are prepared to sacrifice hundreds of thousands of lives in the name of a fake principle, that of NATO’s “right” to expand (a mechanism for converting new members to NATO military requirements which convenienty align with the products of western arms manufacturers).
https://oliverboydbarrett.substack.com/p/fascism-and-its-neocon-variants
2023.05.29 17:51 imightb2old4this before things get too crazy
I just want to say thank you. Thank you to you all. It has been quite a ride, and I am happy to find this sub full of passionate fans. A big, I appreciate you, to the mods, it can't have been easy. So here we are on the precipice, could be the end, could be a continuation, could be a new chapter, but I have enjoyed the heck out of it all. TO RICHMOND!
submitted by imightb2old4this to TedLasso [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 17:35 TheScribe_1 [The Book of the Chosen] - Chapter Eleven - The Room of Doors
Previous Chapter - Read 10 weeks ahead on Patreon - Read the story so far on Royal Road
*
Chapter Eleven - The Room of Doors
‘Get moving!’
Sara watched the men readying their horses, squinting at the brightness of the stone. The courtyard was full of the sound of boot-steps and creaking leather. Overhead, a thin veil of rippled grey hung over the early winter sky, and the dawn sun tugged gleaming at its edges. Overhead, the dull black shape of an old stormtower bled the sky. Empty, just like the rest of them. There was something very jarring, Sara decided, about the worn jerkins and stubbled cheeks of her father’s men, ensconced in a pillared courtyard of vast stone. They were out of place, and they had been every moment since arriving in Uldoroth, she realised. They didn’t belong here. Her own anxiety was mirrored imperfectly with the relief on their weary faces, and the dark rings under their eyes seemed just a little less deep. There may be Black Hand to deal with, back in the Westmere, but it was home. At least there your enemies had the decency to show themselves. Sara realised she was chewing her lip. At her back, two of the Black Guard waited wordlessly in their gold-touched armour, much more in keeping with the finery of the courtyard, and everything else in the capital. They were waiting to escort her away to the Queen, unaware they found a girl not so eager for the honour as she had been, just a few days before.
‘Father!’ She called out, spying him across the writhing mass of men in their moss green cloaks, but he seemed not to hear her. He was standing near the arched cloister at the far side of the square, cloaked and ready for travel, in hurried conversation with a shaded figure standing beyond the marble facade. She squinted, trying to make out the other man, but there was nothing but a dark shadow to trace.
‘Well then, M’lady.’ A voice said beside her, and she turned to find Halin looking down at her, a kind smile on his broad face. ‘You’ll be a right proper Princess when I next see you, methinks.’
Sara smiled at him and shook her head sheepishly. ‘Uldoroth is not my home, yet, Halin. I won’t forget.’
‘Be careful you don’t, Lady Sara.’ Halin glanced distrustfully at the Black Guard behind her. ‘Lots of fancy folk here. Fancy folk with fancier lies.’
‘I’ll be careful, Halin.’ She told him seriously.
He smiled again, and the sternness dissolved away from his face.
‘Take care, M’Lady.’ He told her, dipping his head politely. She returned the gesture, dropping into a small curtsy.
‘Look after my father, will you?’
‘Always, M’Lady.’
Halin hurried off into the throng in the square, and Sara watched him go, feeling her the knot in her belly tighten. The conversations with her unexpected visitors had left their mark, a nagging uncertainty gnawing at the excitement that had carried her through her first few uneventful days in the capital. The little comfort she had taken in the presence of her father and his men was a loss she could ill afford. She watched her father’s back, frowning softly to herself. Her thoughts were not what she had imagined, when she had thought of him leaving. A hundred different times, and more. Had she expected tears, grief at the parting? Relief? Instead, there was only the fear, a dull, leaden weight in her belly, clammy-cold as marsh-water.
‘Come on, you whoresons! I want to be on the road before lunch!’ Halin roared, and the men quickened their work. Her father had not moved, still deep in conversation, just out of sight. She peered a little closer, and for a moment the pale sunlight crept over the top of the square, flashing against a colourful doublet marked with a silver brooch. The Fox’s lips barely moved as he spoke from the shadows of the cloister, and her father was scowling. Sara frowned.
‘Mount up!’
The ornate wagon that had been her home all those weeks trundled into the square, then, drawn by a pair of stout horses. Sara saw her father turn reluctantly towards it, striding out into the square. Sara peered past him into the cloister, and for a moment Lord Bywood’s sharp eyes caught hers. Then he smiled, dipping his dark, smooth head, and vanished himself away into the shadows.
‘Father!’
Sara hurried out into the crowded square, leaving her escort behind, darting between the shifting limbs of the horses. Her father turned towards her as she approached, and smiled small smile, in two parts, one weary, one sad.
‘Sara.’
She threw her arms around him and pressed her head against his chest for a moment, and he put an arm around her shoulders. She knew her role, and the knowing of it made her safe for a moment. Then she stepped back, looking up at him.
‘I thought you were going to leave without saying goodbye.’
‘I… There was much preparation to do.’
Sara did not reply. His eyes had that same distance that they had had since they arrived in the capital. Uldoroth had worn at him, as if all the brightness and finery had made his skin dull, eyes darkened like the contrast of shadows in bright sun.
‘Will you write?’
He blinked as she spoke, then smiled, and the tiredness fell away from him for a moment. He took her chin gently in one hand, tilting it up to meet his eyes.
‘Yes, I will write.’ He told her, and she saw again that fierce ambition in his eyes, the look she had known so well on their journey from the Westmere. Swollen around the soft, lazy ease of diminished strength. ‘And I shall expect news in return. The Rose of Westmere will show these fools how a real lady charms.’
Sara smiled and lowered her eyes self-consciously.
‘I… I will not disappoint you, father.’ She said quietly, and found, in spite of herself, that there were tears in her eyes.
‘See that you do not.’ He replied. Then he let go of her chin and climbed quickly into the carriage. He leaned out from the window for a moment, before they were gone, banging a hand against the wooden panels of the door impatiently.
‘Move out!’
‘You heard him!’ Halin bellowed in response, holding his horse in check beneath him. ‘Back to Westmere, before your wives go straying!’
With that, her father’s men spurred their horses away into the white corridors of the citadel, bound for the sky-cages and the city below. They had arrived on foot, leading their steeds, but they left by horseback, hurried by grave purpose towards the long road west. She watched the window of the carriage as it trundled away with the horses, but her father did not appear again. She stayed there, staring after them, until the party were out of sight and the great gate of the keep heaved closed behind them, slamming into the distant stone with a resounding thud.
‘M’Lady.’
She turned to find the Black Guard waiting, watching her with dark eyes through the narrow slits of their polished helms. For a moment, the suddenness of the departure threatened to overwhelm her. What was it he had told her, slurring over his unfinished dinner, in the pristine perfection of their lodgings, surrounded by invisible eyes? Power belongs to the strong. To those who take it. Just then, standing in the courtyard, watching alone as her father departed, she realised that he was right. And he wasn’t strong enough. She took a deep breath, smiling for the Black Guard, and followed them out of the ancient courtyard into the halls beyond.
*
The broad, open avenues and garden-ways of the Keep of Eranor closed in to interior corridors rather quickly, when you knew the way, and soon Sara was following her black-gilded escort through pale passageways lined with statuettes and tapestries, ceilings lost far overhead to the flickering light of amber flames. An occasional glimpse of pale sunlight leaped out across the stone floor, shimmering through shifting motes of dust. Sara was her Lady-self again, graceful and poised, gliding over the polished floor after her escort. The giant corridors were a maze of twists and turns, past fragment-views of gardens and libraries and sitting-halls and galleries, but she was dimly aware they were moving towards the Hall of the King. The thought made her a little giddy.
‘Will I be received in the King’s Hall?’ She asked as they walked, but the Black Guards didn’t reply, and their armour clinked in the quiet. Sara frowned, following them. The passage curved, rising, and she found that the wall on her right side suddenly gave way to the hall below. One of the galleries, set high in the rafters of the King’s Hall. She stopped, putting her hand on the balustrade and peering out over the ledge, into the vaulted, silent emptiness of the hall. Some fifty foot below, the patterned black and white marble of the floor gleamed in flashes of reflected amber, quiet and empty. At the far end, pale sunlight caught the Night Throne, setting fire in the mirrored stone. Overhead, the matching nightglass ceiling gleamed like a lake in starlight, and swirling figures swept back and forth across it in the shifting light of the chamber. Sara felt a little thrill run over her neck.
‘Sara.’
Sara blinked, starting, and found Dana standing beside her.
‘Sister!’ Sara took hold of her sister’s hands and rose onto her tiptoes, pressing a kiss against her cheek. ‘Here to welcome me into the fold?’
She was struck again by the strangeness of her sister, the difference in her. Dana wore black, a dress of simple lines and inlaid jet, at once relaxed and taut as a lute string. Her pale hands were folded over her belly, and her muddy dark hair was pulled back into a bun. The Black Guards halted behind her, waiting.
‘I am to escort you to the Queen’s chambers.’ Dana said simply. With that she turned and began to walk away along the balcony, towards a closed door at the throne-end of the hall. Sara frowned, hurrying after her.
‘Do the King and Queen not share chambers?’ She asked as they walked, and the hall below drew on beside them.
‘Their Majesties prefer… to keep their own space.’
The Black Guard fell into step at a respectful distance behind them, armoured heels clicking against the stone.
‘How many others are there?’
‘How many what?’
‘Handmaidens. How many does her Majesty keep?’
Dana did not break stride. ‘Two others, and the Matron.’
‘I suppose we shall not have servants of our own.’ Sara said quietly, eyeing the shadows shifting over the nightglass ceiling. ‘No need to spy on us when we are so close.’
‘Sara-’ Dana began, but Sara cut her off.
‘Father is gone, you know. This morning.’
‘I know.’ Dana replied, looking ahead.
‘You did not come to see him.’
Dana did not turn.
‘I’m sure he will miss you terribly, sister.’
Sara bristled suddenly, grabbing her sister’s arm.
‘I did not ask for it!’
Dana looked down at the hand on her arm, frowning. ‘What?’
‘Any of it!’ Sara told her, angry now, her whisper cracking. ‘I didn’t ask to stay. I didn’t ask him to send you away. I would have given anything to go with you. I thought he would never let me leave.’ She lowered her voice, flicking an eye back towards the waiting guards. ‘I did not ask for the way he… the way he…’
She took a breath, swallowing, and straightened, looking her sister in the eye.
‘There are worse things than being ignored, Dana.’
Dana’s hand folded over hers.
‘Let’s… let’s put it behind us.’ She said quietly. ‘You are here, now.’
Sara blinked at her, nodding. She wanted to say more, but her words would not come, locked away from her tongue by the choked gulping of her breath. She lowered her eyes, and Dana squeezed her hand.
‘Sara, listen to me.’ Dana murmured, leaning close. ‘You must be careful. The Queen-’
The door at the far end of the gallery swung open, creaking on its hinges. The pair fell silent, frozen, and whatever Dana might have said, she held instead.
*
‘Wait here.’
The Matron, the head of the Queen’s Keepers, was an elderly woman with rounding hips and hair the colour of ash tied into a tight bun behind the worn-leather creases of her forehead. She was wearing black, same as Dana, though her smock was somehow plainer, when she opened the door onto the gallery, ushering the sisters wordlessly into the corridor beyond. Dana had bowed her head deferentially, withering under the Matron’s hard eyes, and quickly disappeared into one of the many doors of the hallway. Sara almost asked for her to stay, but instead she steeled herself, remembering her lessons, and followed the stern old woman down the long, flickering hallway. The corridors of the keep were all severe, all lit by weak, flickering torchlight and gleaming the gleam of cold stone, but here they were particularly bare. There were no busts, no tapestries, no mosaics. Nothing but cold, dead rock, lent a little life by the dim thrustings of infrequent braziers. In her own apartments, she had understood the quiet, but here, in the keep proper, there was an eery silence to the corridors that jarred with Sara’s anticipation. Where were the nobles in their gay clothes, where was the music and laughter of a King’s Hall? Sara frowned to herself, and kept walking.
The room at the end of the hallway was broad and rounded, like a kind of circle made out of many flat edges, each holding the low light of a brazier. The marble floors were black and white and patterned like a gamesboard, empty but for a broad nightwood table at its centre, matching the room itself for its odd roundness. On the far side, a wall of shutters opened out onto a large, bare balcony, and over the intricately wrought stone balustrade, Sara could see the City of the Moon below, sweeping away towards the edge of the Heartspire, empty stormtowers stabbing black into the sky. Beyond, the great emerald plains of Valia stretched out into the west, past the fiery line of the river Arq, scored with jagged, dark rock and silver streams. Sara swallowed, realising she’d never been so high up.
‘Wait here.’
‘But-‘ She protested, frowning, but the Matron was already gone, turned on her heel and disappeared back the way she had come. Sara flinched as the door slammed shut behind her, and the silence of the room prickled at her skin. The breeze rustled over the balcony, swirling about the pillared windows, but the air inside was still as the grave. She stepped slowly over to the table, touching the polished wood. This much nightwood would have cost more than a wagonload of gold. She traced the knotted lines across the black surface, trying to ignore the cold weight churning in her gut.
Time stretched on around her, and the minutes dragged by like years. Despite the open air flooding through the windows, the chamber was not cool, warmed by the subtle glow of the braziers, and she felt a little wetness beginning to build under her arms. She looked about herself, trying to calm her heart. There were four other doors in the room, besides the one they had entered through, all dark and heavy looking, and each bore a pattern of silver on its face. There was a cradle, and opposite it, a pendant with teeth like a wolf. Beside the cradle door, a small drinks table, a glass jug of purple wine atop it, with a pair of matching glasses. The two doors closest to the balcony bore a sun and a crescent moon. She looked a little closer, and realised that the markings were not moonsilver, merely an imitation in gleaming silver paint, and the door she had entered through bore no markings at all. Sara watched them, imagining the rooms that lay behind each. Which one was the Queen behind, she wondered, and her heart quickened at the thought, stomach churning. She was stranded, here, now, in the capital. What if the Queen didn’t like her? What if she said something wrong? Would she be sent away again, back to her father?
‘Lady Westmere.’
The crescent moon had swung open, and the Queen glided through, a beautiful shadow in a studded black dress, arms glistening with little sharpened sequins the colour of midnight. Her hair had been contorted into an elaborate maze of raven curls over her pate, and her pale skin took on a translucent sheen in the pale light from the balcony doors. The throat of her dress was open, as it had been in the King’s Hall all those days ago, and she wore the same golden necklace, its myriad points sharp like daggers with their drops of ruby blood.
Sara blinked, then remembered herself, and dropped into a low curtsy, bowing her head.
‘Your Majesty.’ She said quietly, keeping her eyes on the floor.
The Queen did not reply. Sara was dimly aware of her shadow moving across the floor, crossing to the drinks table beside the cradle door. Sara risked a glance up, then, and found the Queen’s slender back to her. When she at last turned, she had a glass goblet of wine clutched in her narrow fingers. Sara lowered her eyes again.
‘You are a pretty one, aren’t you.’ The Queen said quietly, as if to herself. Her voice was cold, like ice leaking over lakewater, deep and still. She took a sip from her cup, and Sara could feel the cut of her eyes against her skin. ‘What did the Weasel of Westmere do to sire such a pretty daughter. Your sister, maybe, I understand, but you…’
Sara forced herself not to frown.
‘Well trained, I see.’ The Queen murmured, smiling coldly. She took another sip of her wine. ‘Your mother’s touch, I assume, not your father’s.’
Sara hesitated. She glanced up at the Queen, then lowered her eyes again, nodding.
‘I hear she is unwell.’
Sara looked up again, braver this time, and found the Queen’s dark eyes watching her over the rim of her glass.
‘She has an affliction, Your Majesty. She does not eat, and rarely sleeps. The Keepers say it is a disease of her mind.’
‘The one thing none of us can escape.’ The Queen sighed, toying idly with her glass and looking out of the window over the city below. ‘Still, there are worse places to be sickly than a Lord’s hall.’
‘I suppose… I suppose that is true, Your Majesty.’
The Queen raised an eyebrow. ‘Suppose, do you?’
Sara squirmed for a moment under the weight of her eyes, but then the Queen turned away, stepping slowly around the edge of the table till she was standing beside the open windows. She took another sip of her wine, back to Sara again.
‘Your sister met you, this morning.’
Sara hesitated, thrown for a moment by the abruptness of the statement.
‘Yes, Your Majesty.’
‘And she came to you yesterday, in the apartments Bywood found for you.’
‘Yes.’ Sara felt the cold weight return in her belly. She thought of what the Fox had warned her. There is always someone watching. She cast her mind back to her conversations with Dana. Gods. What had they spoken of? Had she said something out of turn?
‘Curious, that she did not seek out your father.’
Sara let out her breath slowly. That was not a particularly well-hidden curiosity.
‘Dana must have been very busy, Your Majesty.’
‘She is as busy as I make her, and that is rarely too taxing.’
Sara sighed. ‘They have… sometimes not seen eye to eye.’
‘And you?’ The Queen turned as she spoke, fixing her eyes to Sara’s again. Behind her, the distant sounds of the city drifted lazily up through the air, swirling around far-off columns of wispy smoke. ‘What do you say of him?’
Sara hesitated again, stuttering. ‘He is my father, Your Majesty. I trust that he always knows what is best for his daughters.’
‘In my experience it is fathers who know the least about their own daughters.’ The Queen replied dryly, sipping again. ‘Come, let me look at you, then.’
She came back around the nightwood table, her long, narrow limbs gliding over the polished floor, and stopped in front of Sara, setting her glass down beside them. She took Sara’s chin in two spindly fingers and tilted it upwards so that she was looking her in the eye, only a few inches from her face. Sara realised again how tall she was, as tall as her father, at least, though her slender frame made her seem much smaller. She tried not to squirm, but she found that the Queen’s fingers dug uncomfortably into her chin, dark eyes flitting back and forth across her face like a hungry wolf.
‘Yes, very pretty.’ She said at last, not releasing her chin. Sara could feel her breath on her face, smelling softly of dark wine. ‘No wonder. You look like her, you know.’
‘Who-‘ but the Queen had already turned away, back to the table, picking up her wineglass in one bone-stretched hand.
‘The Matron will meet you outside. She will give you your tasks and show you to your chamber. You will begin tomorrow.’
Sara flinched, realising she had been holding her breath. She curtsied to the Queen’s back, suddenly a little giddy.
‘Thank you, Your Majesty.’
‘You may go, girl.’
Sara turned to go, not at all sure what to make of the encounter. She paused at the door, looking back over her shoulder, but found the Queen looking out over the city silently again, wineglass in hand, black dress glistening with jet. Sara hesitated a moment longer, then hurried out into the corridor beyond the unmarked door, closing it behind her.
*
The night before her father leaves, she wakes in darkness.
She does not open her eyes, but she knows it is not yet dawn. The sounds of the garden beyond her shutters are soft and murmuring, wind-stirred and drip-spotted.
She can feel him over her, the tense stillness of him, closer than shadows. He smells of wine. Sweat. She is cold, but she does not move. She dares not move. She can feel the weight of his eyes, dulled with drink, tracing the lines of her. His breathing sounds like anger.
She does not know how long she waits there, frozen. But she does not open her eyes. Not once. Time stretches out before her in that moment, an eternity of breathless terror.
Then he leaves. The smell of him lingers long after the door has closed behind him. She lays there a while longer, motionless, dead as stone. Then she curls into her own arms, and weeps silently until the dawn.
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Chapter Eleven - The Room of Doors
‘Get moving!’
Sara watched the men readying their horses, squinting at the brightness of the stone. The courtyard was full of the sound of boot-steps and creaking leather. Overhead, a thin veil of rippled grey hung over the early winter sky, and the dawn sun tugged gleaming at its edges. Overhead, the dull black shape of an old stormtower bled the sky. Empty, just like the rest of them. There was something very jarring, Sara decided, about the worn jerkins and stubbled cheeks of her father’s men, ensconced in a pillared courtyard of vast stone. They were out of place, and they had been every moment since arriving in Uldoroth, she realised. They didn’t belong here. Her own anxiety was mirrored imperfectly with the relief on their weary faces, and the dark rings under their eyes seemed just a little less deep. There may be Black Hand to deal with, back in the Westmere, but it was home. At least there your enemies had the decency to show themselves. Sara realised she was chewing her lip. At her back, two of the Black Guard waited wordlessly in their gold-touched armour, much more in keeping with the finery of the courtyard, and everything else in the capital. They were waiting to escort her away to the Queen, unaware they found a girl not so eager for the honour as she had been, just a few days before.
‘Father!’ She called out, spying him across the writhing mass of men in their moss green cloaks, but he seemed not to hear her. He was standing near the arched cloister at the far side of the square, cloaked and ready for travel, in hurried conversation with a shaded figure standing beyond the marble facade. She squinted, trying to make out the other man, but there was nothing but a dark shadow to trace.
‘Well then, M’lady.’ A voice said beside her, and she turned to find Halin looking down at her, a kind smile on his broad face. ‘You’ll be a right proper Princess when I next see you, methinks.’
Sara smiled at him and shook her head sheepishly. ‘Uldoroth is not my home, yet, Halin. I won’t forget.’
‘Be careful you don’t, Lady Sara.’ Halin glanced distrustfully at the Black Guard behind her. ‘Lots of fancy folk here. Fancy folk with fancier lies.’
‘I’ll be careful, Halin.’ She told him seriously.
He smiled again, and the sternness dissolved away from his face.
‘Take care, M’Lady.’ He told her, dipping his head politely. She returned the gesture, dropping into a small curtsy.
‘Look after my father, will you?’
‘Always, M’Lady.’
Halin hurried off into the throng in the square, and Sara watched him go, feeling her the knot in her belly tighten. The conversations with her unexpected visitors had left their mark, a nagging uncertainty gnawing at the excitement that had carried her through her first few uneventful days in the capital. The little comfort she had taken in the presence of her father and his men was a loss she could ill afford. She watched her father’s back, frowning softly to herself. Her thoughts were not what she had imagined, when she had thought of him leaving. A hundred different times, and more. Had she expected tears, grief at the parting? Relief? Instead, there was only the fear, a dull, leaden weight in her belly, clammy-cold as marsh-water.
‘Come on, you whoresons! I want to be on the road before lunch!’ Halin roared, and the men quickened their work. Her father had not moved, still deep in conversation, just out of sight. She peered a little closer, and for a moment the pale sunlight crept over the top of the square, flashing against a colourful doublet marked with a silver brooch. The Fox’s lips barely moved as he spoke from the shadows of the cloister, and her father was scowling. Sara frowned.
‘Mount up!’
The ornate wagon that had been her home all those weeks trundled into the square, then, drawn by a pair of stout horses. Sara saw her father turn reluctantly towards it, striding out into the square. Sara peered past him into the cloister, and for a moment Lord Bywood’s sharp eyes caught hers. Then he smiled, dipping his dark, smooth head, and vanished himself away into the shadows.
‘Father!’
Sara hurried out into the crowded square, leaving her escort behind, darting between the shifting limbs of the horses. Her father turned towards her as she approached, and smiled small smile, in two parts, one weary, one sad.
‘Sara.’
She threw her arms around him and pressed her head against his chest for a moment, and he put an arm around her shoulders. She knew her role, and the knowing of it made her safe for a moment. Then she stepped back, looking up at him.
‘I thought you were going to leave without saying goodbye.’
‘I… There was much preparation to do.’
Sara did not reply. His eyes had that same distance that they had had since they arrived in the capital. Uldoroth had worn at him, as if all the brightness and finery had made his skin dull, eyes darkened like the contrast of shadows in bright sun.
‘Will you write?’
He blinked as she spoke, then smiled, and the tiredness fell away from him for a moment. He took her chin gently in one hand, tilting it up to meet his eyes.
‘Yes, I will write.’ He told her, and she saw again that fierce ambition in his eyes, the look she had known so well on their journey from the Westmere. Swollen around the soft, lazy ease of diminished strength. ‘And I shall expect news in return. The Rose of Westmere will show these fools how a real lady charms.’
Sara smiled and lowered her eyes self-consciously.
‘I… I will not disappoint you, father.’ She said quietly, and found, in spite of herself, that there were tears in her eyes.
‘See that you do not.’ He replied. Then he let go of her chin and climbed quickly into the carriage. He leaned out from the window for a moment, before they were gone, banging a hand against the wooden panels of the door impatiently.
‘Move out!’
‘You heard him!’ Halin bellowed in response, holding his horse in check beneath him. ‘Back to Westmere, before your wives go straying!’
With that, her father’s men spurred their horses away into the white corridors of the citadel, bound for the sky-cages and the city below. They had arrived on foot, leading their steeds, but they left by horseback, hurried by grave purpose towards the long road west. She watched the window of the carriage as it trundled away with the horses, but her father did not appear again. She stayed there, staring after them, until the party were out of sight and the great gate of the keep heaved closed behind them, slamming into the distant stone with a resounding thud.
‘M’Lady.’
She turned to find the Black Guard waiting, watching her with dark eyes through the narrow slits of their polished helms. For a moment, the suddenness of the departure threatened to overwhelm her. What was it he had told her, slurring over his unfinished dinner, in the pristine perfection of their lodgings, surrounded by invisible eyes? Power belongs to the strong. To those who take it. Just then, standing in the courtyard, watching alone as her father departed, she realised that he was right. And he wasn’t strong enough. She took a deep breath, smiling for the Black Guard, and followed them out of the ancient courtyard into the halls beyond.
*
The broad, open avenues and garden-ways of the Keep of Eranor closed in to interior corridors rather quickly, when you knew the way, and soon Sara was following her black-gilded escort through pale passageways lined with statuettes and tapestries, ceilings lost far overhead to the flickering light of amber flames. An occasional glimpse of pale sunlight leaped out across the stone floor, shimmering through shifting motes of dust. Sara was her Lady-self again, graceful and poised, gliding over the polished floor after her escort. The giant corridors were a maze of twists and turns, past fragment-views of gardens and libraries and sitting-halls and galleries, but she was dimly aware they were moving towards the Hall of the King. The thought made her a little giddy.
‘Will I be received in the King’s Hall?’ She asked as they walked, but the Black Guards didn’t reply, and their armour clinked in the quiet. Sara frowned, following them. The passage curved, rising, and she found that the wall on her right side suddenly gave way to the hall below. One of the galleries, set high in the rafters of the King’s Hall. She stopped, putting her hand on the balustrade and peering out over the ledge, into the vaulted, silent emptiness of the hall. Some fifty foot below, the patterned black and white marble of the floor gleamed in flashes of reflected amber, quiet and empty. At the far end, pale sunlight caught the Night Throne, setting fire in the mirrored stone. Overhead, the matching nightglass ceiling gleamed like a lake in starlight, and swirling figures swept back and forth across it in the shifting light of the chamber. Sara felt a little thrill run over her neck.
‘Sara.’
Sara blinked, starting, and found Dana standing beside her.
‘Sister!’ Sara took hold of her sister’s hands and rose onto her tiptoes, pressing a kiss against her cheek. ‘Here to welcome me into the fold?’
She was struck again by the strangeness of her sister, the difference in her. Dana wore black, a dress of simple lines and inlaid jet, at once relaxed and taut as a lute string. Her pale hands were folded over her belly, and her muddy dark hair was pulled back into a bun. The Black Guards halted behind her, waiting.
‘I am to escort you to the Queen’s chambers.’ Dana said simply. With that she turned and began to walk away along the balcony, towards a closed door at the throne-end of the hall. Sara frowned, hurrying after her.
‘Do the King and Queen not share chambers?’ She asked as they walked, and the hall below drew on beside them.
‘Their Majesties prefer… to keep their own space.’
The Black Guard fell into step at a respectful distance behind them, armoured heels clicking against the stone.
‘How many others are there?’
‘How many what?’
‘Handmaidens. How many does her Majesty keep?’
Dana did not break stride. ‘Two others, and the Matron.’
‘I suppose we shall not have servants of our own.’ Sara said quietly, eyeing the shadows shifting over the nightglass ceiling. ‘No need to spy on us when we are so close.’
‘Sara-’ Dana began, but Sara cut her off.
‘Father is gone, you know. This morning.’
‘I know.’ Dana replied, looking ahead.
‘You did not come to see him.’
Dana did not turn.
‘I’m sure he will miss you terribly, sister.’
Sara bristled suddenly, grabbing her sister’s arm.
‘I did not ask for it!’
Dana looked down at the hand on her arm, frowning. ‘What?’
‘Any of it!’ Sara told her, angry now, her whisper cracking. ‘I didn’t ask to stay. I didn’t ask him to send you away. I would have given anything to go with you. I thought he would never let me leave.’ She lowered her voice, flicking an eye back towards the waiting guards. ‘I did not ask for the way he… the way he…’
She took a breath, swallowing, and straightened, looking her sister in the eye.
‘There are worse things than being ignored, Dana.’
Dana’s hand folded over hers.
‘Let’s… let’s put it behind us.’ She said quietly. ‘You are here, now.’
Sara blinked at her, nodding. She wanted to say more, but her words would not come, locked away from her tongue by the choked gulping of her breath. She lowered her eyes, and Dana squeezed her hand.
‘Sara, listen to me.’ Dana murmured, leaning close. ‘You must be careful. The Queen-’
The door at the far end of the gallery swung open, creaking on its hinges. The pair fell silent, frozen, and whatever Dana might have said, she held instead.
*
‘Wait here.’
The Matron, the head of the Queen’s Keepers, was an elderly woman with rounding hips and hair the colour of ash tied into a tight bun behind the worn-leather creases of her forehead. She was wearing black, same as Dana, though her smock was somehow plainer, when she opened the door onto the gallery, ushering the sisters wordlessly into the corridor beyond. Dana had bowed her head deferentially, withering under the Matron’s hard eyes, and quickly disappeared into one of the many doors of the hallway. Sara almost asked for her to stay, but instead she steeled herself, remembering her lessons, and followed the stern old woman down the long, flickering hallway. The corridors of the keep were all severe, all lit by weak, flickering torchlight and gleaming the gleam of cold stone, but here they were particularly bare. There were no busts, no tapestries, no mosaics. Nothing but cold, dead rock, lent a little life by the dim thrustings of infrequent braziers. In her own apartments, she had understood the quiet, but here, in the keep proper, there was an eery silence to the corridors that jarred with Sara’s anticipation. Where were the nobles in their gay clothes, where was the music and laughter of a King’s Hall? Sara frowned to herself, and kept walking.
The room at the end of the hallway was broad and rounded, like a kind of circle made out of many flat edges, each holding the low light of a brazier. The marble floors were black and white and patterned like a gamesboard, empty but for a broad nightwood table at its centre, matching the room itself for its odd roundness. On the far side, a wall of shutters opened out onto a large, bare balcony, and over the intricately wrought stone balustrade, Sara could see the City of the Moon below, sweeping away towards the edge of the Heartspire, empty stormtowers stabbing black into the sky. Beyond, the great emerald plains of Valia stretched out into the west, past the fiery line of the river Arq, scored with jagged, dark rock and silver streams. Sara swallowed, realising she’d never been so high up.
‘Wait here.’
‘But-‘ She protested, frowning, but the Matron was already gone, turned on her heel and disappeared back the way she had come. Sara flinched as the door slammed shut behind her, and the silence of the room prickled at her skin. The breeze rustled over the balcony, swirling about the pillared windows, but the air inside was still as the grave. She stepped slowly over to the table, touching the polished wood. This much nightwood would have cost more than a wagonload of gold. She traced the knotted lines across the black surface, trying to ignore the cold weight churning in her gut.
Time stretched on around her, and the minutes dragged by like years. Despite the open air flooding through the windows, the chamber was not cool, warmed by the subtle glow of the braziers, and she felt a little wetness beginning to build under her arms. She looked about herself, trying to calm her heart. There were four other doors in the room, besides the one they had entered through, all dark and heavy looking, and each bore a pattern of silver on its face. There was a cradle, and opposite it, a pendant with teeth like a wolf. Beside the cradle door, a small drinks table, a glass jug of purple wine atop it, with a pair of matching glasses. The two doors closest to the balcony bore a sun and a crescent moon. She looked a little closer, and realised that the markings were not moonsilver, merely an imitation in gleaming silver paint, and the door she had entered through bore no markings at all. Sara watched them, imagining the rooms that lay behind each. Which one was the Queen behind, she wondered, and her heart quickened at the thought, stomach churning. She was stranded, here, now, in the capital. What if the Queen didn’t like her? What if she said something wrong? Would she be sent away again, back to her father?
‘Lady Westmere.’
The crescent moon had swung open, and the Queen glided through, a beautiful shadow in a studded black dress, arms glistening with little sharpened sequins the colour of midnight. Her hair had been contorted into an elaborate maze of raven curls over her pate, and her pale skin took on a translucent sheen in the pale light from the balcony doors. The throat of her dress was open, as it had been in the King’s Hall all those days ago, and she wore the same golden necklace, its myriad points sharp like daggers with their drops of ruby blood.
Sara blinked, then remembered herself, and dropped into a low curtsy, bowing her head.
‘Your Majesty.’ She said quietly, keeping her eyes on the floor.
The Queen did not reply. Sara was dimly aware of her shadow moving across the floor, crossing to the drinks table beside the cradle door. Sara risked a glance up, then, and found the Queen’s slender back to her. When she at last turned, she had a glass goblet of wine clutched in her narrow fingers. Sara lowered her eyes again.
‘You are a pretty one, aren’t you.’ The Queen said quietly, as if to herself. Her voice was cold, like ice leaking over lakewater, deep and still. She took a sip from her cup, and Sara could feel the cut of her eyes against her skin. ‘What did the Weasel of Westmere do to sire such a pretty daughter. Your sister, maybe, I understand, but you…’
Sara forced herself not to frown.
‘Well trained, I see.’ The Queen murmured, smiling coldly. She took another sip of her wine. ‘Your mother’s touch, I assume, not your father’s.’
Sara hesitated. She glanced up at the Queen, then lowered her eyes again, nodding.
‘I hear she is unwell.’
Sara looked up again, braver this time, and found the Queen’s dark eyes watching her over the rim of her glass.
‘She has an affliction, Your Majesty. She does not eat, and rarely sleeps. The Keepers say it is a disease of her mind.’
‘The one thing none of us can escape.’ The Queen sighed, toying idly with her glass and looking out of the window over the city below. ‘Still, there are worse places to be sickly than a Lord’s hall.’
‘I suppose… I suppose that is true, Your Majesty.’
The Queen raised an eyebrow. ‘Suppose, do you?’
Sara squirmed for a moment under the weight of her eyes, but then the Queen turned away, stepping slowly around the edge of the table till she was standing beside the open windows. She took another sip of her wine, back to Sara again.
‘Your sister met you, this morning.’
Sara hesitated, thrown for a moment by the abruptness of the statement.
‘Yes, Your Majesty.’
‘And she came to you yesterday, in the apartments Bywood found for you.’
‘Yes.’ Sara felt the cold weight return in her belly. She thought of what the Fox had warned her. There is always someone watching. She cast her mind back to her conversations with Dana. Gods. What had they spoken of? Had she said something out of turn?
‘Curious, that she did not seek out your father.’
Sara let out her breath slowly. That was not a particularly well-hidden curiosity.
‘Dana must have been very busy, Your Majesty.’
‘She is as busy as I make her, and that is rarely too taxing.’
Sara sighed. ‘They have… sometimes not seen eye to eye.’
‘And you?’ The Queen turned as she spoke, fixing her eyes to Sara’s again. Behind her, the distant sounds of the city drifted lazily up through the air, swirling around far-off columns of wispy smoke. ‘What do you say of him?’
Sara hesitated again, stuttering. ‘He is my father, Your Majesty. I trust that he always knows what is best for his daughters.’
‘In my experience it is fathers who know the least about their own daughters.’ The Queen replied dryly, sipping again. ‘Come, let me look at you, then.’
She came back around the nightwood table, her long, narrow limbs gliding over the polished floor, and stopped in front of Sara, setting her glass down beside them. She took Sara’s chin in two spindly fingers and tilted it upwards so that she was looking her in the eye, only a few inches from her face. Sara realised again how tall she was, as tall as her father, at least, though her slender frame made her seem much smaller. She tried not to squirm, but she found that the Queen’s fingers dug uncomfortably into her chin, dark eyes flitting back and forth across her face like a hungry wolf.
‘Yes, very pretty.’ She said at last, not releasing her chin. Sara could feel her breath on her face, smelling softly of dark wine. ‘No wonder. You look like her, you know.’
‘Who-‘ but the Queen had already turned away, back to the table, picking up her wineglass in one bone-stretched hand.
‘The Matron will meet you outside. She will give you your tasks and show you to your chamber. You will begin tomorrow.’
Sara flinched, realising she had been holding her breath. She curtsied to the Queen’s back, suddenly a little giddy.
‘Thank you, Your Majesty.’
‘You may go, girl.’
Sara turned to go, not at all sure what to make of the encounter. She paused at the door, looking back over her shoulder, but found the Queen looking out over the city silently again, wineglass in hand, black dress glistening with jet. Sara hesitated a moment longer, then hurried out into the corridor beyond the unmarked door, closing it behind her.
*
The night before her father leaves, she wakes in darkness.
She does not open her eyes, but she knows it is not yet dawn. The sounds of the garden beyond her shutters are soft and murmuring, wind-stirred and drip-spotted.
She can feel him over her, the tense stillness of him, closer than shadows. He smells of wine. Sweat. She is cold, but she does not move. She dares not move. She can feel the weight of his eyes, dulled with drink, tracing the lines of her. His breathing sounds like anger.
She does not know how long she waits there, frozen. But she does not open her eyes. Not once. Time stretches out before her in that moment, an eternity of breathless terror.
Then he leaves. The smell of him lingers long after the door has closed behind him. She lays there a while longer, motionless, dead as stone. Then she curls into her own arms, and weeps silently until the dawn.
2023.05.29 17:33 TheScribe_1 [The Book of the Chosen] - Chapter Eleven - The Room of Doors
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*
Chapter Eleven - The Room of Doors
‘Get moving!’
Sara watched the men readying their horses, squinting at the bright-ness of the stone. The courtyard was full of the sound of boot-steps and creaking leather. Overhead, a thin veil of rippled grey hung over the early winter sky, and the dawn sun tugged gleaming at its edges. Over-head, the dull black shape of an old stormtower bled the sky. Empty, just like the rest of them. There was something very jarring, Sara de-cided, about the worn jerkins and stubbled cheeks of her father’s men, ensconced in a pillared courtyard of vast stone. They were out of place, and they had been every moment since arriving in Uldoroth, she real-ised. They didn’t belong here. Her own anxiety was mirrored imper-fectly with the relief on their weary faces, and the dark rings under their eyes seemed just a little less deep. There may be Black Hand to deal with, back in the Westmere, but it was home. At least there your ene-mies had the decency to show themselves. Sara realised she was chew-ing her lip. At her back, two of the Black Guard waited wordlessly in their gold-touched armour, much more in keeping with the finery of the courtyard, and everything else in the capital. They were waiting to es-cort her away to the Queen, unaware they found a girl not so eager for the honour as she had been, just a few days before.
‘Father!’ She called out, spying him across the writhing mass of men in their moss green cloaks, but he seemed not to hear her. He was standing near the arched cloister at the far side of the square, cloaked and ready for travel, in hurried conversation with a shaded figure stand-ing beyond the marble facade. She squinted, trying to make out the oth-er man, but there was nothing but a dark shadow to trace.
‘Well then, M’lady.’ A voice said beside her, and she turned to find Halin looking down at her, a kind smile on his broad face. ‘You’ll be a right proper Princess when I next see you, methinks.’
Sara smiled at him and shook her head sheepishly. ‘Uldoroth is not my home, yet, Halin. I won’t forget.’
‘Be careful you don’t, Lady Sara.’ Halin glanced distrustfully at the Black Guard behind her. ‘Lots of fancy folk here. Fancy folk with fan-cier lies.’
‘I’ll be careful, Halin.’ She told him seriously.
He smiled again, and the sternness dissolved away from his face.
‘Take care, M’Lady.’ He told her, dipping his head politely. She re-turned the gesture, dropping into a small curtsy.
‘Look after my father, will you?’
‘Always, M’Lady.’
Halin hurried off into the throng in the square, and Sara watched him go, feeling her the knot in her belly tighten. The conversations with her unexpected visitors had left their mark, a nagging uncertainty gnawing at the excitement that had carried her through her first few uneventful days in the capital. The little comfort she had taken in the presence of her father and his men was a loss she could ill afford. She watched her father’s back, frowning softly to herself. Her thoughts were not what she had imagined, when she had thought of him leaving. A hundred dif-ferent times, and more. Had she expected tears, grief at the parting? Re-lief? Instead, there was only the fear, a dull, leaden weight in her belly, clammy-cold as marsh-water.
‘Come on, you whoresons! I want to be on the road before lunch!’ Halin roared, and the men quickened their work. Her father had not moved, still deep in conversation, just out of sight. She peered a little closer, and for a moment the pale sunlight crept over the top of the square, flashing against a colourful doublet marked with a silver brooch. The Fox’s lips barely moved as he spoke from the shadows of the cloister, and her father was scowling. Sara frowned.
‘Mount up!’
The ornate wagon that had been her home all those weeks trundled into the square, then, drawn by a pair of stout horses. Sara saw her fa-ther turn reluctantly towards it, striding out into the square. Sara peered past him into the cloister, and for a moment Lord Bywood’s sharp eyes caught hers. Then he smiled, dipping his dark, smooth head, and van-ished himself away into the shadows.
‘Father!’
Sara hurried out into the crowded square, leaving her escort behind, darting between the shifting limbs of the horses. Her father turned to-wards her as she approached, and smiled small smile, in two parts, one weary, one sad.
‘Sara.’
She threw her arms around him and pressed her head against his chest for a moment, and he put an arm around her shoulders. She knew her role, and the knowing of it made her safe for a moment. Then she stepped back, looking up at him.
‘I thought you were going to leave without saying goodbye.’
‘I… There was much preparation to do.’
Sara did not reply. His eyes had that same distance that they had had since they arrived in the capital. Uldoroth had worn at him, as if all the brightness and finery had made his skin dull, eyes darkened like the contrast of shadows in bright sun.
‘Will you write?’
He blinked as she spoke, then smiled, and the tiredness fell away from him for a moment. He took her chin gently in one hand, tilting it up to meet his eyes.
‘Yes, I will write.’ He told her, and she saw again that fierce ambi-tion in his eyes, the look she had known so well on their journey from the Westmere. Swollen around the soft, lazy ease of diminished strength. ‘And I shall expect news in return. The Rose of Westmere will show these fools how a real lady charms.’
Sara smiled and lowered her eyes self-consciously.
‘I… I will not disappoint you, father.’ She said quietly, and found, in spite of herself, that there were tears in her eyes.
‘See that you do not.’ He replied. Then he let go of her chin and climbed quickly into the carriage. He leaned out from the window for a moment, before they were gone, banging a hand against the wooden panels of the door impatiently.
‘Move out!’
‘You heard him!’ Halin bellowed in response, holding his horse in check beneath him. ‘Back to Westmere, before your wives go stray-ing!’
With that, her father’s men spurred their horses away into the white corridors of the citadel, bound for the sky-cages and the city below. They had arrived on foot, leading their steeds, but they left by horse-back, hurried by grave purpose towards the long road west. She watched the window of the carriage as it trundled away with the horses, but her father did not appear again. She stayed there, staring after them, until the party were out of sight and the great gate of the keep heaved closed behind them, slamming into the distant stone with a resounding thud.
‘M’Lady.’
She turned to find the Black Guard waiting, watching her with dark eyes through the narrow slits of their polished helms. For a moment, the suddenness of the departure threatened to overwhelm her. What was it he had told her, slurring over his unfinished dinner, in the pristine per-fection of their lodgings, surrounded by invisible eyes? Power belongs to the strong. To those who take it. Just then, standing in the courtyard, watching alone as her father departed, she realised that he was right. And he wasn’t strong enough. She took a deep breath, smiling for the Black Guard, and followed them out of the ancient courtyard into the halls beyond.
*
The broad, open avenues and garden-ways of the Keep of Eranor closed in to interior corridors rather quickly, when you knew the way, and soon Sara was following her black-gilded escort through pale pas-sageways lined with statuettes and tapestries, ceilings lost far overhead to the flickering light of amber flames. An occasional glimpse of pale sunlight leaped out across the stone floor, shimmering through shifting motes of dust. Sara was her Lady-self again, graceful and poised, glid-ing over the polished floor after her escort. The giant corridors were a maze of twists and turns, past fragment-views of gardens and libraries and sitting-halls and galleries, but she was dimly aware they were mov-ing towards the Hall of the King. The thought made her a little giddy.
‘Will I be received in the King’s Hall?’ She asked as they walked, but the Black Guards didn’t reply, and their armour clinked in the quiet. Sara frowned, following them. The passage curved, rising, and she found that the wall on her right side suddenly gave way to the hall be-low. One of the galleries, set high in the rafters of the King’s Hall. She stopped, putting her hand on the balustrade and peering out over the ledge, into the vaulted, silent emptiness of the hall. Some fifty foot be-low, the patterned black and white marble of the floor gleamed in flashes of reflected amber, quiet and empty. At the far end, pale sun-light caught the Night Throne, setting fire in the mirrored stone. Over-head, the matching nightglass ceiling gleamed like a lake in starlight, and swirling figures swept back and forth across it in the shifting light of the chamber. Sara felt a little thrill run over her neck.
‘Sara.’
Sara blinked, starting, and found Dana standing beside her.
‘Sister!’ Sara took hold of her sister’s hands and rose onto her tip-toes, pressing a kiss against her cheek. ‘Here to welcome me into the fold?’
She was struck again by the strangeness of her sister, the difference in her. Dana wore black, a dress of simple lines and inlaid jet, at once relaxed and taut as a lute string. Her pale hands were folded over her belly, and her muddy dark hair was pulled back into a bun. The Black Guards halted behind her, waiting.
‘I am to escort you to the Queen’s chambers.’ Dana said simply. With that she turned and began to walk away along the balcony, to-wards a closed door at the throne-end of the hall. Sara frowned, hurry-ing after her.
‘Do the King and Queen not share chambers?’ She asked as they walked, and the hall below drew on beside them.
‘Their Majesties prefer… to keep their own space.’
The Black Guard fell into step at a respectful distance behind them, armoured heels clicking against the stone.
‘How many others are there?’
‘How many what?’
‘Handmaidens. How many does her Majesty keep?’
Dana did not break stride. ‘Two others, and the Matron.’
‘I suppose we shall not have servants of our own.’ Sara said quietly, eyeing the shadows shifting over the nightglass ceiling. ‘No need to spy on us when we are so close.’
‘Sara-’ Dana began, but Sara cut her off.
‘Father is gone, you know. This morning.’
‘I know.’ Dana replied, looking ahead.
‘You did not come to see him.’
Dana did not turn.
‘I’m sure he will miss you terribly, sister.’
Sara bristled suddenly, grabbing her sister’s arm.
‘I did not ask for it!’
Dana looked down at the hand on her arm, frowning. ‘What?’
‘Any of it!’ Sara told her, angry now, her whisper cracking. ‘I didn’t ask to stay. I didn’t ask him to send you away. I would have given any-thing to go with you. I thought he would never let me leave.’ She low-ered her voice, flicking an eye back towards the waiting guards. ‘I did not ask for the way he… the way he…’
She took a breath, swallowing, and straightened, looking her sister in the eye.
‘There are worse things than being ignored, Dana.’
Dana’s hand folded over hers.
‘Let’s… let’s put it behind us.’ She said quietly. ‘You are here, now.’
Sara blinked at her, nodding. She wanted to say more, but her words would not come, locked away from her tongue by the choked gulping of her breath. She lowered her eyes, and Dana squeezed her hand.
‘Sara, listen to me.’ Dana murmured, leaning close. ‘You must be careful. The Queen-’
The door at the far end of the gallery swung open, creaking on its hinges. The pair fell silent, frozen, and whatever Dana might have said, she held instead.
*
‘Wait here.’
The Matron, the head of the Queen’s Keepers, was an elderly wom-an with rounding hips and hair the colour of ash tied into a tight bun behind the worn-leather creases of her forehead. She was wearing black, same as Dana, though her smock was somehow plainer, when she opened the door onto the gallery, ushering the sisters wordlessly in-to the corridor beyond. Dana had bowed her head deferentially, wither-ing under the Matron’s hard eyes, and quickly disappeared into one of the many doors of the hallway. Sara almost asked for her to stay, but instead she steeled herself, remembering her lessons, and followed the stern old woman down the long, flickering hallway. The corridors of the keep were all severe, all lit by weak, flickering torchlight and gleaming the gleam of cold stone, but here they were particularly bare. There were no busts, no tapestries, no mosaics. Nothing but cold, dead rock, lent a little life by the dim thrustings of infrequent braziers. In her own apartments, she had understood the quiet, but here, in the keep proper, there was an eery silence to the corridors that jarred with Sara’s anticipation. Where were the nobles in their gay clothes, where was the music and laughter of a King’s Hall? Sara frowned to herself, and kept walking.
The room at the end of the hallway was broad and rounded, like a kind of circle made out of many flat edges, each holding the low light of a brazier. The marble floors were black and white and patterned like a gamesboard, empty but for a broad nightwood table at its centre, matching the room itself for its odd roundness. On the far side, a wall of shutters opened out onto a large, bare balcony, and over the intricate-ly wrought stone balustrade, Sara could see the City of the Moon be-low, sweeping away towards the edge of the Heartspire, empty stormtowers stabbing black into the sky. Beyond, the great emerald plains of Valia stretched out into the west, past the fiery line of the river Arq, scored with jagged, dark rock and silver streams. Sara swallowed, realising she’d never been so high up.
‘Wait here.’
‘But-‘ She protested, frowning, but the Matron was already gone, turned on her heel and disappeared back the way she had come. Sara flinched as the door slammed shut behind her, and the silence of the room prickled at her skin. The breeze rustled over the balcony, swirling about the pillared windows, but the air inside was still as the grave. She stepped slowly over to the table, touching the polished wood. This much nightwood would have cost more than a wagonload of gold. She traced the knotted lines across the black surface, trying to ignore the cold weight churning in her gut.
Time stretched on around her, and the minutes dragged by like years. Despite the open air flooding through the windows, the chamber was not cool, warmed by the subtle glow of the braziers, and she felt a little wetness beginning to build under her arms. She looked about her-self, trying to calm her heart. There were four other doors in the room, besides the one they had entered through, all dark and heavy looking, and each bore a pattern of silver on its face. There was a cradle, and opposite it, a pendant with teeth like a wolf. Beside the cradle door, a small drinks table, a glass jug of purple wine atop it, with a pair of matching glasses. The two doors closest to the balcony bore a sun and a crescent moon. She looked a little closer, and realised that the markings were not moonsilver, merely an imitation in gleaming silver paint, and the door she had entered through bore no markings at all. Sara watched them, imagining the rooms that lay behind each. Which one was the Queen behind, she wondered, and her heart quickened at the thought, stomach churning. She was stranded, here, now, in the capital. What if the Queen didn’t like her? What if she said something wrong? Would she be sent away again, back to her father?
‘Lady Westmere.’
The crescent moon had swung open, and the Queen glided through, a beautiful shadow in a studded black dress, arms glistening with little sharpened sequins the colour of midnight. Her hair had been contorted into an elaborate maze of raven curls over her pate, and her pale skin took on a translucent sheen in the pale light from the balcony doors. The throat of her dress was open, as it had been in the King’s Hall all those days ago, and she wore the same golden necklace, its myriad points sharp like daggers with their drops of ruby blood.
Sara blinked, then remembered herself, and dropped into a low curt-sy, bowing her head.
‘Your Majesty.’ She said quietly, keeping her eyes on the floor.
The Queen did not reply. Sara was dimly aware of her shadow mov-ing across the floor, crossing to the drinks table beside the cradle door. Sara risked a glance up, then, and found the Queen’s slender back to her. When she at last turned, she had a glass goblet of wine clutched in her narrow fingers. Sara lowered her eyes again.
‘You are a pretty one, aren’t you.’ The Queen said quietly, as if to herself. Her voice was cold, like ice leaking over lakewater, deep and still. She took a sip from her cup, and Sara could feel the cut of her eyes against her skin. ‘What did the Weasel of Westmere do to sire such a pretty daughter. Your sister, maybe, I understand, but you…’
Sara forced herself not to frown.
‘Well trained, I see.’ The Queen murmured, smiling coldly. She took another sip of her wine. ‘Your mother’s touch, I assume, not your fa-ther’s.’
Sara hesitated. She glanced up at the Queen, then lowered her eyes again, nodding.
‘I hear she is unwell.’
Sara looked up again, braver this time, and found the Queen’s dark eyes watching her over the rim of her glass.
‘She has an affliction, Your Majesty. She does not eat, and rarely sleeps. The Keepers say it is a disease of her mind.’
‘The one thing none of us can escape.’ The Queen sighed, toying idly with her glass and looking out of the window over the city below. ‘Still, there are worse places to be sickly than a Lord’s hall.’
‘I suppose… I suppose that is true, Your Majesty.’
The Queen raised an eyebrow. ‘Suppose, do you?’
Sara squirmed for a moment under the weight of her eyes, but then the Queen turned away, stepping slowly around the edge of the table till she was standing beside the open windows. She took another sip of her wine, back to Sara again.
‘Your sister met you, this morning.’
Sara hesitated, thrown for a moment by the abruptness of the state-ment.
‘Yes, Your Majesty.’
‘And she came to you yesterday, in the apartments Bywood found for you.’
‘Yes.’ Sara felt the cold weight return in her belly. She thought of what the Fox had warned her. There is always someone watching. She cast her mind back to her conversations with Dana. Gods. What had they spoken of? Had she said something out of turn?
‘Curious, that she did not seek out your father.’
Sara let out her breath slowly. That was not a particularly well-hidden curiosity.
‘Dana must have been very busy, Your Majesty.’
‘She is as busy as I make her, and that is rarely too taxing.’
Sara sighed. ‘They have… sometimes not seen eye to eye.’
‘And you?’ The Queen turned as she spoke, fixing her eyes to Sara’s again. Behind her, the distant sounds of the city drifted lazily up through the air, swirling around far-off columns of wispy smoke. ‘What do you say of him?’
Sara hesitated again, stuttering. ‘He is my father, Your Majesty. I trust that he always knows what is best for his daughters.’
‘In my experience it is fathers who know the least about their own daughters.’ The Queen replied dryly, sipping again. ‘Come, let me look at you, then.’
She came back around the nightwood table, her long, narrow limbs gliding over the polished floor, and stopped in front of Sara, setting her glass down beside them. She took Sara’s chin in two spindly fingers and tilted it upwards so that she was looking her in the eye, only a few inches from her face. Sara realised again how tall she was, as tall as her father, at least, though her slender frame made her seem much smaller. She tried not to squirm, but she found that the Queen’s fingers dug un-comfortably into her chin, dark eyes flitting back and forth across her face like a hungry wolf.
‘Yes, very pretty.’ She said at last, not releasing her chin. Sara could feel her breath on her face, smelling softly of dark wine. ‘No wonder. You look like her, you know.’
‘Who-‘ but the Queen had already turned away, back to the table, picking up her wineglass in one bone-stretched hand.
‘The Matron will meet you outside. She will give you your tasks and show you to your chamber. You will begin tomorrow.’
Sara flinched, realising she had been holding her breath. She curt-sied to the Queen’s back, suddenly a little giddy.
‘Thank you, Your Majesty.’
‘You may go, girl.’
Sara turned to go, not at all sure what to make of the encounter. She paused at the door, looking back over her shoulder, but found the Queen looking out over the city silently again, wineglass in hand, black dress glistening with jet. Sara hesitated a moment longer, then hurried out into the corridor beyond the unmarked door, closing it behind her.
*
The night before her father leaves, she wakes in darkness.
She does not open her eyes, but she knows it is not yet dawn. The sounds of the garden beyond her shutters are soft and murmuring, wind-stirred and drip-spotted.
She can feel him over her, the tense stillness of him, closer than shadows. He smells of wine. Sweat. She is cold, but she does not move. She dares not move. She can feel the weight of his eyes, dulled with drink, tracing the lines of her. His breathing sounds like anger.
She does not know how long she waits there, frozen. But she does not open her eyes. Not once. Time stretches out before her in that mo-ment, an eternity of breathless terror.
Then he leaves. The smell of him lingers long after the door has closed behind him. She lays there a while longer, motionless, dead as stone. Then she curls into her own arms, and weeps silently until the dawn.
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*
Chapter Eleven - The Room of Doors
‘Get moving!’
Sara watched the men readying their horses, squinting at the bright-ness of the stone. The courtyard was full of the sound of boot-steps and creaking leather. Overhead, a thin veil of rippled grey hung over the early winter sky, and the dawn sun tugged gleaming at its edges. Over-head, the dull black shape of an old stormtower bled the sky. Empty, just like the rest of them. There was something very jarring, Sara de-cided, about the worn jerkins and stubbled cheeks of her father’s men, ensconced in a pillared courtyard of vast stone. They were out of place, and they had been every moment since arriving in Uldoroth, she real-ised. They didn’t belong here. Her own anxiety was mirrored imper-fectly with the relief on their weary faces, and the dark rings under their eyes seemed just a little less deep. There may be Black Hand to deal with, back in the Westmere, but it was home. At least there your ene-mies had the decency to show themselves. Sara realised she was chew-ing her lip. At her back, two of the Black Guard waited wordlessly in their gold-touched armour, much more in keeping with the finery of the courtyard, and everything else in the capital. They were waiting to es-cort her away to the Queen, unaware they found a girl not so eager for the honour as she had been, just a few days before.
‘Father!’ She called out, spying him across the writhing mass of men in their moss green cloaks, but he seemed not to hear her. He was standing near the arched cloister at the far side of the square, cloaked and ready for travel, in hurried conversation with a shaded figure stand-ing beyond the marble facade. She squinted, trying to make out the oth-er man, but there was nothing but a dark shadow to trace.
‘Well then, M’lady.’ A voice said beside her, and she turned to find Halin looking down at her, a kind smile on his broad face. ‘You’ll be a right proper Princess when I next see you, methinks.’
Sara smiled at him and shook her head sheepishly. ‘Uldoroth is not my home, yet, Halin. I won’t forget.’
‘Be careful you don’t, Lady Sara.’ Halin glanced distrustfully at the Black Guard behind her. ‘Lots of fancy folk here. Fancy folk with fan-cier lies.’
‘I’ll be careful, Halin.’ She told him seriously.
He smiled again, and the sternness dissolved away from his face.
‘Take care, M’Lady.’ He told her, dipping his head politely. She re-turned the gesture, dropping into a small curtsy.
‘Look after my father, will you?’
‘Always, M’Lady.’
Halin hurried off into the throng in the square, and Sara watched him go, feeling her the knot in her belly tighten. The conversations with her unexpected visitors had left their mark, a nagging uncertainty gnawing at the excitement that had carried her through her first few uneventful days in the capital. The little comfort she had taken in the presence of her father and his men was a loss she could ill afford. She watched her father’s back, frowning softly to herself. Her thoughts were not what she had imagined, when she had thought of him leaving. A hundred dif-ferent times, and more. Had she expected tears, grief at the parting? Re-lief? Instead, there was only the fear, a dull, leaden weight in her belly, clammy-cold as marsh-water.
‘Come on, you whoresons! I want to be on the road before lunch!’ Halin roared, and the men quickened their work. Her father had not moved, still deep in conversation, just out of sight. She peered a little closer, and for a moment the pale sunlight crept over the top of the square, flashing against a colourful doublet marked with a silver brooch. The Fox’s lips barely moved as he spoke from the shadows of the cloister, and her father was scowling. Sara frowned.
‘Mount up!’
The ornate wagon that had been her home all those weeks trundled into the square, then, drawn by a pair of stout horses. Sara saw her fa-ther turn reluctantly towards it, striding out into the square. Sara peered past him into the cloister, and for a moment Lord Bywood’s sharp eyes caught hers. Then he smiled, dipping his dark, smooth head, and van-ished himself away into the shadows.
‘Father!’
Sara hurried out into the crowded square, leaving her escort behind, darting between the shifting limbs of the horses. Her father turned to-wards her as she approached, and smiled small smile, in two parts, one weary, one sad.
‘Sara.’
She threw her arms around him and pressed her head against his chest for a moment, and he put an arm around her shoulders. She knew her role, and the knowing of it made her safe for a moment. Then she stepped back, looking up at him.
‘I thought you were going to leave without saying goodbye.’
‘I… There was much preparation to do.’
Sara did not reply. His eyes had that same distance that they had had since they arrived in the capital. Uldoroth had worn at him, as if all the brightness and finery had made his skin dull, eyes darkened like the contrast of shadows in bright sun.
‘Will you write?’
He blinked as she spoke, then smiled, and the tiredness fell away from him for a moment. He took her chin gently in one hand, tilting it up to meet his eyes.
‘Yes, I will write.’ He told her, and she saw again that fierce ambi-tion in his eyes, the look she had known so well on their journey from the Westmere. Swollen around the soft, lazy ease of diminished strength. ‘And I shall expect news in return. The Rose of Westmere will show these fools how a real lady charms.’
Sara smiled and lowered her eyes self-consciously.
‘I… I will not disappoint you, father.’ She said quietly, and found, in spite of herself, that there were tears in her eyes.
‘See that you do not.’ He replied. Then he let go of her chin and climbed quickly into the carriage. He leaned out from the window for a moment, before they were gone, banging a hand against the wooden panels of the door impatiently.
‘Move out!’
‘You heard him!’ Halin bellowed in response, holding his horse in check beneath him. ‘Back to Westmere, before your wives go stray-ing!’
With that, her father’s men spurred their horses away into the white corridors of the citadel, bound for the sky-cages and the city below. They had arrived on foot, leading their steeds, but they left by horse-back, hurried by grave purpose towards the long road west. She watched the window of the carriage as it trundled away with the horses, but her father did not appear again. She stayed there, staring after them, until the party were out of sight and the great gate of the keep heaved closed behind them, slamming into the distant stone with a resounding thud.
‘M’Lady.’
She turned to find the Black Guard waiting, watching her with dark eyes through the narrow slits of their polished helms. For a moment, the suddenness of the departure threatened to overwhelm her. What was it he had told her, slurring over his unfinished dinner, in the pristine per-fection of their lodgings, surrounded by invisible eyes? Power belongs to the strong. To those who take it. Just then, standing in the courtyard, watching alone as her father departed, she realised that he was right. And he wasn’t strong enough. She took a deep breath, smiling for the Black Guard, and followed them out of the ancient courtyard into the halls beyond.
*
The broad, open avenues and garden-ways of the Keep of Eranor closed in to interior corridors rather quickly, when you knew the way, and soon Sara was following her black-gilded escort through pale pas-sageways lined with statuettes and tapestries, ceilings lost far overhead to the flickering light of amber flames. An occasional glimpse of pale sunlight leaped out across the stone floor, shimmering through shifting motes of dust. Sara was her Lady-self again, graceful and poised, glid-ing over the polished floor after her escort. The giant corridors were a maze of twists and turns, past fragment-views of gardens and libraries and sitting-halls and galleries, but she was dimly aware they were mov-ing towards the Hall of the King. The thought made her a little giddy.
‘Will I be received in the King’s Hall?’ She asked as they walked, but the Black Guards didn’t reply, and their armour clinked in the quiet. Sara frowned, following them. The passage curved, rising, and she found that the wall on her right side suddenly gave way to the hall be-low. One of the galleries, set high in the rafters of the King’s Hall. She stopped, putting her hand on the balustrade and peering out over the ledge, into the vaulted, silent emptiness of the hall. Some fifty foot be-low, the patterned black and white marble of the floor gleamed in flashes of reflected amber, quiet and empty. At the far end, pale sun-light caught the Night Throne, setting fire in the mirrored stone. Over-head, the matching nightglass ceiling gleamed like a lake in starlight, and swirling figures swept back and forth across it in the shifting light of the chamber. Sara felt a little thrill run over her neck.
‘Sara.’
Sara blinked, starting, and found Dana standing beside her.
‘Sister!’ Sara took hold of her sister’s hands and rose onto her tip-toes, pressing a kiss against her cheek. ‘Here to welcome me into the fold?’
She was struck again by the strangeness of her sister, the difference in her. Dana wore black, a dress of simple lines and inlaid jet, at once relaxed and taut as a lute string. Her pale hands were folded over her belly, and her muddy dark hair was pulled back into a bun. The Black Guards halted behind her, waiting.
‘I am to escort you to the Queen’s chambers.’ Dana said simply. With that she turned and began to walk away along the balcony, to-wards a closed door at the throne-end of the hall. Sara frowned, hurry-ing after her.
‘Do the King and Queen not share chambers?’ She asked as they walked, and the hall below drew on beside them.
‘Their Majesties prefer… to keep their own space.’
The Black Guard fell into step at a respectful distance behind them, armoured heels clicking against the stone.
‘How many others are there?’
‘How many what?’
‘Handmaidens. How many does her Majesty keep?’
Dana did not break stride. ‘Two others, and the Matron.’
‘I suppose we shall not have servants of our own.’ Sara said quietly, eyeing the shadows shifting over the nightglass ceiling. ‘No need to spy on us when we are so close.’
‘Sara-’ Dana began, but Sara cut her off.
‘Father is gone, you know. This morning.’
‘I know.’ Dana replied, looking ahead.
‘You did not come to see him.’
Dana did not turn.
‘I’m sure he will miss you terribly, sister.’
Sara bristled suddenly, grabbing her sister’s arm.
‘I did not ask for it!’
Dana looked down at the hand on her arm, frowning. ‘What?’
‘Any of it!’ Sara told her, angry now, her whisper cracking. ‘I didn’t ask to stay. I didn’t ask him to send you away. I would have given any-thing to go with you. I thought he would never let me leave.’ She low-ered her voice, flicking an eye back towards the waiting guards. ‘I did not ask for the way he… the way he…’
She took a breath, swallowing, and straightened, looking her sister in the eye.
‘There are worse things than being ignored, Dana.’
Dana’s hand folded over hers.
‘Let’s… let’s put it behind us.’ She said quietly. ‘You are here, now.’
Sara blinked at her, nodding. She wanted to say more, but her words would not come, locked away from her tongue by the choked gulping of her breath. She lowered her eyes, and Dana squeezed her hand.
‘Sara, listen to me.’ Dana murmured, leaning close. ‘You must be careful. The Queen-’
The door at the far end of the gallery swung open, creaking on its hinges. The pair fell silent, frozen, and whatever Dana might have said, she held instead.
*
‘Wait here.’
The Matron, the head of the Queen’s Keepers, was an elderly wom-an with rounding hips and hair the colour of ash tied into a tight bun behind the worn-leather creases of her forehead. She was wearing black, same as Dana, though her smock was somehow plainer, when she opened the door onto the gallery, ushering the sisters wordlessly in-to the corridor beyond. Dana had bowed her head deferentially, wither-ing under the Matron’s hard eyes, and quickly disappeared into one of the many doors of the hallway. Sara almost asked for her to stay, but instead she steeled herself, remembering her lessons, and followed the stern old woman down the long, flickering hallway. The corridors of the keep were all severe, all lit by weak, flickering torchlight and gleaming the gleam of cold stone, but here they were particularly bare. There were no busts, no tapestries, no mosaics. Nothing but cold, dead rock, lent a little life by the dim thrustings of infrequent braziers. In her own apartments, she had understood the quiet, but here, in the keep proper, there was an eery silence to the corridors that jarred with Sara’s anticipation. Where were the nobles in their gay clothes, where was the music and laughter of a King’s Hall? Sara frowned to herself, and kept walking.
The room at the end of the hallway was broad and rounded, like a kind of circle made out of many flat edges, each holding the low light of a brazier. The marble floors were black and white and patterned like a gamesboard, empty but for a broad nightwood table at its centre, matching the room itself for its odd roundness. On the far side, a wall of shutters opened out onto a large, bare balcony, and over the intricate-ly wrought stone balustrade, Sara could see the City of the Moon be-low, sweeping away towards the edge of the Heartspire, empty stormtowers stabbing black into the sky. Beyond, the great emerald plains of Valia stretched out into the west, past the fiery line of the river Arq, scored with jagged, dark rock and silver streams. Sara swallowed, realising she’d never been so high up.
‘Wait here.’
‘But-‘ She protested, frowning, but the Matron was already gone, turned on her heel and disappeared back the way she had come. Sara flinched as the door slammed shut behind her, and the silence of the room prickled at her skin. The breeze rustled over the balcony, swirling about the pillared windows, but the air inside was still as the grave. She stepped slowly over to the table, touching the polished wood. This much nightwood would have cost more than a wagonload of gold. She traced the knotted lines across the black surface, trying to ignore the cold weight churning in her gut.
Time stretched on around her, and the minutes dragged by like years. Despite the open air flooding through the windows, the chamber was not cool, warmed by the subtle glow of the braziers, and she felt a little wetness beginning to build under her arms. She looked about her-self, trying to calm her heart. There were four other doors in the room, besides the one they had entered through, all dark and heavy looking, and each bore a pattern of silver on its face. There was a cradle, and opposite it, a pendant with teeth like a wolf. Beside the cradle door, a small drinks table, a glass jug of purple wine atop it, with a pair of matching glasses. The two doors closest to the balcony bore a sun and a crescent moon. She looked a little closer, and realised that the markings were not moonsilver, merely an imitation in gleaming silver paint, and the door she had entered through bore no markings at all. Sara watched them, imagining the rooms that lay behind each. Which one was the Queen behind, she wondered, and her heart quickened at the thought, stomach churning. She was stranded, here, now, in the capital. What if the Queen didn’t like her? What if she said something wrong? Would she be sent away again, back to her father?
‘Lady Westmere.’
The crescent moon had swung open, and the Queen glided through, a beautiful shadow in a studded black dress, arms glistening with little sharpened sequins the colour of midnight. Her hair had been contorted into an elaborate maze of raven curls over her pate, and her pale skin took on a translucent sheen in the pale light from the balcony doors. The throat of her dress was open, as it had been in the King’s Hall all those days ago, and she wore the same golden necklace, its myriad points sharp like daggers with their drops of ruby blood.
Sara blinked, then remembered herself, and dropped into a low curt-sy, bowing her head.
‘Your Majesty.’ She said quietly, keeping her eyes on the floor.
The Queen did not reply. Sara was dimly aware of her shadow mov-ing across the floor, crossing to the drinks table beside the cradle door. Sara risked a glance up, then, and found the Queen’s slender back to her. When she at last turned, she had a glass goblet of wine clutched in her narrow fingers. Sara lowered her eyes again.
‘You are a pretty one, aren’t you.’ The Queen said quietly, as if to herself. Her voice was cold, like ice leaking over lakewater, deep and still. She took a sip from her cup, and Sara could feel the cut of her eyes against her skin. ‘What did the Weasel of Westmere do to sire such a pretty daughter. Your sister, maybe, I understand, but you…’
Sara forced herself not to frown.
‘Well trained, I see.’ The Queen murmured, smiling coldly. She took another sip of her wine. ‘Your mother’s touch, I assume, not your fa-ther’s.’
Sara hesitated. She glanced up at the Queen, then lowered her eyes again, nodding.
‘I hear she is unwell.’
Sara looked up again, braver this time, and found the Queen’s dark eyes watching her over the rim of her glass.
‘She has an affliction, Your Majesty. She does not eat, and rarely sleeps. The Keepers say it is a disease of her mind.’
‘The one thing none of us can escape.’ The Queen sighed, toying idly with her glass and looking out of the window over the city below. ‘Still, there are worse places to be sickly than a Lord’s hall.’
‘I suppose… I suppose that is true, Your Majesty.’
The Queen raised an eyebrow. ‘Suppose, do you?’
Sara squirmed for a moment under the weight of her eyes, but then the Queen turned away, stepping slowly around the edge of the table till she was standing beside the open windows. She took another sip of her wine, back to Sara again.
‘Your sister met you, this morning.’
Sara hesitated, thrown for a moment by the abruptness of the state-ment.
‘Yes, Your Majesty.’
‘And she came to you yesterday, in the apartments Bywood found for you.’
‘Yes.’ Sara felt the cold weight return in her belly. She thought of what the Fox had warned her. There is always someone watching. She cast her mind back to her conversations with Dana. Gods. What had they spoken of? Had she said something out of turn?
‘Curious, that she did not seek out your father.’
Sara let out her breath slowly. That was not a particularly well-hidden curiosity.
‘Dana must have been very busy, Your Majesty.’
‘She is as busy as I make her, and that is rarely too taxing.’
Sara sighed. ‘They have… sometimes not seen eye to eye.’
‘And you?’ The Queen turned as she spoke, fixing her eyes to Sara’s again. Behind her, the distant sounds of the city drifted lazily up through the air, swirling around far-off columns of wispy smoke. ‘What do you say of him?’
Sara hesitated again, stuttering. ‘He is my father, Your Majesty. I trust that he always knows what is best for his daughters.’
‘In my experience it is fathers who know the least about their own daughters.’ The Queen replied dryly, sipping again. ‘Come, let me look at you, then.’
She came back around the nightwood table, her long, narrow limbs gliding over the polished floor, and stopped in front of Sara, setting her glass down beside them. She took Sara’s chin in two spindly fingers and tilted it upwards so that she was looking her in the eye, only a few inches from her face. Sara realised again how tall she was, as tall as her father, at least, though her slender frame made her seem much smaller. She tried not to squirm, but she found that the Queen’s fingers dug un-comfortably into her chin, dark eyes flitting back and forth across her face like a hungry wolf.
‘Yes, very pretty.’ She said at last, not releasing her chin. Sara could feel her breath on her face, smelling softly of dark wine. ‘No wonder. You look like her, you know.’
‘Who-‘ but the Queen had already turned away, back to the table, picking up her wineglass in one bone-stretched hand.
‘The Matron will meet you outside. She will give you your tasks and show you to your chamber. You will begin tomorrow.’
Sara flinched, realising she had been holding her breath. She curt-sied to the Queen’s back, suddenly a little giddy.
‘Thank you, Your Majesty.’
‘You may go, girl.’
Sara turned to go, not at all sure what to make of the encounter. She paused at the door, looking back over her shoulder, but found the Queen looking out over the city silently again, wineglass in hand, black dress glistening with jet. Sara hesitated a moment longer, then hurried out into the corridor beyond the unmarked door, closing it behind her.
*
The night before her father leaves, she wakes in darkness.
She does not open her eyes, but she knows it is not yet dawn. The sounds of the garden beyond her shutters are soft and murmuring, wind-stirred and drip-spotted.
She can feel him over her, the tense stillness of him, closer than shadows. He smells of wine. Sweat. She is cold, but she does not move. She dares not move. She can feel the weight of his eyes, dulled with drink, tracing the lines of her. His breathing sounds like anger.
She does not know how long she waits there, frozen. But she does not open her eyes. Not once. Time stretches out before her in that mo-ment, an eternity of breathless terror.
Then he leaves. The smell of him lingers long after the door has closed behind him. She lays there a while longer, motionless, dead as stone. Then she curls into her own arms, and weeps silently until the dawn.
2023.05.29 17:32 immacamel Defending the Draft: 2023 Green Bay Packers
A new era is under way in Green Bay, and there's a lot to cover about this offseason. First, let's set the stage.
Key Signings:
KR Keisean Nixon- the return dynamo who renewed my will to live after watching Amari Rodgers play football. Signed again on a 1 year deal worth up to $4m. And he figures to have a larger role on defense this season. This was one of the biggest wishes for packer fans this offseason, as it finally shows a dedication to building the ST unit.
S Rudy Ford- he had himself a nice 2022 and got re-signed for his efforts. It's a one year deal, and he will compete for the starting safety spot as of now.
CB Corey Ballentine- a reserve CB who I will always have a soft spot for due to his tragic draft night story. Ballentine has been re-signed and will compete for snaps in an unsettled secondary.
S Dallin Leavitt- a Rich Bisaccia re-signing. Leavitt was a quiet killer last season as a special teams ace, and he returns in that role this season.
OT Yosh Nijman- a developmental prospect that has blossomed into an serviceable swing tackle, I thought Nijman would get more on the open market than his RFA tender price. He will be back with the Pack in a LT2 and RT2 role for 2023.
Key Departures:
DT Dean Lowry- Lowry gave the Pack his best and we appreciate him, but his ceiling was evident and achieved. Devonte Wyatt was drafted as a high upside replacement. Lowry signed with the Vikings on a 2 year deal.
WR Allen Lazard- Aaron Rodgers's latest security blanket, Lazard is rejoining Rodgers on a 4y, 44m deal with the New York Jets. A quiet, consistent performer for the Packers throughout his tenure, Lazard will continue to be a sure-handed possession receiver in New York, transforming the slot position previously occupied by Elijah Moore into more of a big slot. He will also continue to mug people in the run game.
TE Robert Tonyan- Bobby Tonyan heads south to Chicago to be TE2 behind Cole Kmet. Packer fans love Tonyan for bringing pride back to the position in GB, and I honestly feel bad for him. He likely missed on his chance for a big pay day after tearing his ACL in 2021 and having a down year coming back. Now he's pushing 30, but he still provides excellent hands for the position and a great work ethic. Godspeed, buddy.
DL Jarran Reed- the big man returns to Seattle this season on a 2 year deal. Reed was just about what we expected in Green Bay- not great, not bad. He was a placeholder in a spot that Wyatt hopefully can take over.
Free Agents yet to be signed:
WR Randall Cobb, S Adrian Amos, TE Marcedes Lewis, K Mason Crosby
All members of the old guard. Cobb recently had surgery, and is a contender to rejoin Rodgers in NY. Amos had a down year, but could still have some left in the tank. I'm guessing he has an offer from GB and is weighing his options. Lewis also could be weighing his options between retirement, the Jets, or sailing into the sunset where it all began for him in Jacksonville. Mason Crosbys wife seemed to confirm on social media recently that the Packers have little interest in re-signing their all time leading scorer. Crosby made some clutch kicks for us over the years, and if this is the end, the Silver Fox will never have to buy a beer in Titletown again.
2022 season review: Record: 8-9 Oh man. 2022 was the year it all came crashing down. Green Bay tried to keep its veteran core together for a few years, appeasing Rodgers and navigating the salary cap reasonably well. But they never achieved that brass ring. Minus Davante Adams and working with a broken thumb, Rodgers struggled the most he has since his inaugural season as a starter. It's now time to address Rodgers in this post; I could write an entire entry solely on Rodgers and this past season, but I'll leave it at this: Aaron is my favorite football player of all time. He led the Packers to their greatest stretch of sustained excellence since Vince Lombardi roamed the sidelines, often with depleted rosters around him. In my opinion, hes the most talented QB to play the game. It seems a majority of Packer fans were ready to move on from the man and soured on him this offseason. Personally, I think he will be an MVP contender in NY next year and still love him. But it was time. The Jordan Love era needs to happen, if only for the front office itself needing to justify their faith in the Love pick. Rodgers and the Packers were operating on different timelines the past few years, stuck somewhere between going all in and resetting. The front office has put all their chips in on Jordan Love.
The defense was expected to be a top 5 unit, but regressed heavily. Joe Barry was under scrutiny all year long, seemingly incapable of putting his plethora of first rounders in positions to succeed. A late season push did just enough to save his job (apparently).
Favorite win: Dallas Most frustrating loss: Detroit, week 18
Rodgers's exit also raises an interesting thought: will we see the True Matt LaFleur Offense this season? Offensive deficiencies have been blamed on Lafleur himself or Rodgers's hesitancy at transitioning from a traditional west coast offense to a Shanahan-esque, motion based attack. The answer will be uncovered this year, with Jordan Love having 3 years of experience in the scheme and a first round pedigree. As a Love truther in the pre draft season who hated the pick for the Packers, I am fascinated. This pick will make or break Gute's and Lafleur's tenure.
Aside from the quarterback situation, there are lingering questions concerning LaFleur's ability to lead the team in general. The Packers have consistently laid an egg in one game every season of his tenure and have come up short in the playoffs, with some head scratching decisions rearing their head in crunch time of big games (the end of the Bucs NFC championship the most glaring). I also have questions on his staff hirings/retentions. LaFleur hired 2 dogshit ST coordinators before making the obvious choice of Basaccia. He also chose to retain Joe Barry, noted football terrorist, as defensive coordinator. I've read rumblings that Gute has more say over the staff than the head coach, which is unconfirmed but concerning. I don't mean to dump on LaFleur in this piece, only to emphasize how big of a year this is for him. I think his scheme is sound and the guys play hard for him. With Rodgers gone, I think we see less RPOs and inside zone handoffs to AJ Dillon out of shotgun. The offense will have more identity. But if there are 2 more years without the playoffs in Green Bay, the Cheeseheads will advocate for a new coach.
2023 Draft:
Positions of need: S, TE, WR, DT
Round 1, Pick 13: Lukas Van Ness, Edge, Iowa With the world expecting Jaxon Smith-Njigba, Gute stuck true to his type and drafted athletic freak LVN out of Iowa. Van Ness profiles as a Rashan Gary clone, with a high RAS score and unrefined repertoire of pass rush moves. If he works out like Gary, this is a massive hit. In the pre draft process, the only guy who could have realistically been there for GB that I had above Van Ness was Peter Skoronski. He wasn't there, and there was no doubt in my mind Gute was going for LVN afterwards. He'll rotate with Gary and Preston Smith this year, and will kick inside on certain packages. He makes Smith expendable in the future.
Round 2, Pick 42: Luke Musgrave, TE, Oregon State Musgrave has the size and athleticism to be a game changer at tight end. His tape was short but encouraging. His biggest questions are durability and how he will develop, given his late breakout and immediate injury afterwards. My comparison to his playstyle was Travis Kelce, and if he can approach even 70% of Kelce's production in a season, this is a great pick. The biggest hole on the roster was TE, and I have a feeling Gute got the top one on his board.
Round 2, Pick 50: Jayden Reed, WR, Michigan State The process of this pick was nerve wracking. I was one of many fans pounding the table for Brian Branch, the S out of Alabama. When Gute traded down instead, I was telling friends I hoped he took Jayden Reed, and that's what happened. Reed is smaller receiver who plays bigger than his size on contested catches. He carried the Michigan State offense last year after Kenneth Walker jumped to the NFL. My comparison for him is Tyler Lockett. In Green Bay, Reed will take over the slot role, and I expect him to see around 60% of offensive snaps.
Round 3, Pick 78: Tucker Kraft, TE, South Dakota State Another tight end added to a barren room. The former Jackrabbit is similar to Musgrave in a lot of ways- big, athletic, and a willing albeit unrefined blocker. Kraft's addition along with Musgraves could push the Packers into more 22 personal this season, something LaFleur wants to run but hasnt had the personnel for, and I would not be surprised to see him outsnap Musgrave if he develops quickly. I'm really hoping this is the pick that breaks Green Bays 3rd round curse (seriously look it up its so bad).
Round 4, Pick 116: Colby Wooden, Edge, Auburn A former 4 star recruit at Auburn, Wooden collected 17 sacks as a 3 year starter in the SEC and showed inside/outside versatility. He shows an ability to rush with speed and power, but is inconsistent in his pad level and technique. He anchors well in the run game and showed great gap discipline. I don't see him getting many snaps this year, but if he does I think he takes Kingsley Engabare's role on run downs.
Round 5, Pick 149: Sean Clifford, QB, Penn State A perplexing pick until I saw this man somehow has a 9 RAS. Clifford is an experienced college starter who plays with a clear understanding of his role and a passion for the game. My issues with him were accuracy, arm strength, pocket presence, and decision making. You know, playing quarterback. I did not give Clifford a draftable grade and would have preferred Jaren Hall or Max Duggan. But this is really nit picking over a 5th round pick who was drafted to be a career backup. If the staff sees something in him, I'll give it a chance.
Round 5, Pick 159: Dontayvion Wicks, WR, Virginia A 6'1, 206 lb vertical threat, Wicks was inconsistent in his career at Virginia. If he replicated his 2021 production last year, he might have found himself as a day 2 pick. Alas, a new offense and drops led to his availability at this spot. Wicks has a good release package and the ability to stack DBs and get vertical. His tendencies as a body catcher led to drops last year, and he doesn't provide much after the catch. With his profile, he'll be a WR4/5, but could be a special teams ace very early in his career.
Round 6, Pick 179: Karl Brooks, DL, Bowling Green A bit of a tweener, Brooks is a high motor, high effort pass rusher. He flashes great technique and seems to rush with a plan. He can get washed out in the run game, and will need to commit one way or another to defensive end or defensive tackle. He graded very high from PFF, so that's something. To get on the field, he'll have to show more consistency and ability when anchoring down in the run game.
Round 6, Pick 207: Anders Carlson, K, Auburn Apparently, Mason Crosby's replacement. Anders is the brother of Las Vegas kicker Daniel Carlson, who's pretty damn good. There is a connection with Basaccia there, who's known Anders since high school. I wasn't encouraged by his stats at Auburn, but I'm not going to pretend to be an expert in scouting kickers. If Basaccia says he's that dude, then that dude he is.
Round 7, Pick 232: Carrington Valentine, CB, Kentucky Valentine is a WR convert with a long, slender frame. He is at his best in press man, where he has a variety of ways to get hands on the receiver and reroute him. Unfortunately for Vallentine, Joe Barry hates press man and will kill my family if I suggest it again. Valentine's frame can lead him to get bullied by bigger WRs at times, but he is physical at the catch point. He also brings experience as a productive kick returner, something that could be helpful in the future or even this season if the staff wants to keep Nixon fresh for defensive snaps.
Round 7, Pick 235: Lew Nichols, RB, Central Michigan A big back with some intriguing traits, Nichols enjoyed a very productive 2021 before injuries hampered his 2022. Nichols has good vision, contact balance, and power as a north-south runner. He was productive catching out of the backfield, but wasn't asked to run many routes beyond that. His biggest hurdles in the NFL are going to be elusiveness and speed. He lacks both, but should be a decent backup. For the Packers, they used their RB3 less than maybe any team in the league last year. This will be the Jones&Dillon show again in 2023.
Round 7, Pick 242: Anthony Johnson Jr, S, Iowa State Johnson Jr is a converted cornerback who plays with rare physicality for someone of that description. He did his best work in the box or in the slot at Iowa State, and that may be where the Pack will try to get him some snaps this year. He can be over aggressive in his pursuits at times and take bad angles, but that is coachable. Given the state of the safety room, the 7th round rookie may find himself starting some games this season.
Round 7, Pick 256: Grant DuBose, WR, Charlotte DuBose comes from UNC Charlotte, where there apparently is a football team, and he was 2nd team all C-USA last season. DuBose has excellent size at 6'2, and I love his agility on in-breaking routes crossing the face of safeties. He has experience both outside and in the slot, and is an interesting addition to the WR battle at the bottom of the roster, which is going to be highly competitive. It may come down to how good he can be on special teams. Coaches and teammates rave about his work ethic and love of football, and he worked at Walmart while keeping himself in shape during the Covid year. I'm optimistic he can carve out a role for himself and make the team.
Overall, Gutekunst drafted for need at times in this draft, but still stuck to picking guys that fit his type: big, athletic, and versatile. My biggest shock was not taking a safety until the 7th round, but I think it just never lined up with his board. There was an obvious effort to surround Love with talented pass catchers, which is a breath of fresh air from this team. I was surprised that they didn't take a single offensive linemen, given this is almost certainly Bakh's last year in the green and gold and question marks surrounding some of our young guys, but we drafted 3 linemen last year and the staff may have high hopes for Zach Tom to be the next left tackle. The franchise has earned the benefit of the doubt when it comes to scouting and developing OL.
All told, 2023 is the most excited I've been for a Packer season in a few years. There are so many unknown variables surrounding the team, from Jordan Loves development to LaFleur's offense to Joe Barry's pending glue eating scandal. Media pundits have them ranked somewhere between 20 & 26 in the league hierarchy heading into the year. Personally, I'm a little higher on the Pack, and they will shoot up these rankings if Jordan Love delivers. There's a lot on Love's shoulders. This is the season we've been waiting for with baited breath for 3 years, the post-Rodgers era, and now it's here, for better or worse.
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Key Signings:
KR Keisean Nixon- the return dynamo who renewed my will to live after watching Amari Rodgers play football. Signed again on a 1 year deal worth up to $4m. And he figures to have a larger role on defense this season. This was one of the biggest wishes for packer fans this offseason, as it finally shows a dedication to building the ST unit.
S Rudy Ford- he had himself a nice 2022 and got re-signed for his efforts. It's a one year deal, and he will compete for the starting safety spot as of now.
CB Corey Ballentine- a reserve CB who I will always have a soft spot for due to his tragic draft night story. Ballentine has been re-signed and will compete for snaps in an unsettled secondary.
S Dallin Leavitt- a Rich Bisaccia re-signing. Leavitt was a quiet killer last season as a special teams ace, and he returns in that role this season.
OT Yosh Nijman- a developmental prospect that has blossomed into an serviceable swing tackle, I thought Nijman would get more on the open market than his RFA tender price. He will be back with the Pack in a LT2 and RT2 role for 2023.
Key Departures:
DT Dean Lowry- Lowry gave the Pack his best and we appreciate him, but his ceiling was evident and achieved. Devonte Wyatt was drafted as a high upside replacement. Lowry signed with the Vikings on a 2 year deal.
WR Allen Lazard- Aaron Rodgers's latest security blanket, Lazard is rejoining Rodgers on a 4y, 44m deal with the New York Jets. A quiet, consistent performer for the Packers throughout his tenure, Lazard will continue to be a sure-handed possession receiver in New York, transforming the slot position previously occupied by Elijah Moore into more of a big slot. He will also continue to mug people in the run game.
TE Robert Tonyan- Bobby Tonyan heads south to Chicago to be TE2 behind Cole Kmet. Packer fans love Tonyan for bringing pride back to the position in GB, and I honestly feel bad for him. He likely missed on his chance for a big pay day after tearing his ACL in 2021 and having a down year coming back. Now he's pushing 30, but he still provides excellent hands for the position and a great work ethic. Godspeed, buddy.
DL Jarran Reed- the big man returns to Seattle this season on a 2 year deal. Reed was just about what we expected in Green Bay- not great, not bad. He was a placeholder in a spot that Wyatt hopefully can take over.
Free Agents yet to be signed:
WR Randall Cobb, S Adrian Amos, TE Marcedes Lewis, K Mason Crosby
All members of the old guard. Cobb recently had surgery, and is a contender to rejoin Rodgers in NY. Amos had a down year, but could still have some left in the tank. I'm guessing he has an offer from GB and is weighing his options. Lewis also could be weighing his options between retirement, the Jets, or sailing into the sunset where it all began for him in Jacksonville. Mason Crosbys wife seemed to confirm on social media recently that the Packers have little interest in re-signing their all time leading scorer. Crosby made some clutch kicks for us over the years, and if this is the end, the Silver Fox will never have to buy a beer in Titletown again.
2022 season review: Record: 8-9 Oh man. 2022 was the year it all came crashing down. Green Bay tried to keep its veteran core together for a few years, appeasing Rodgers and navigating the salary cap reasonably well. But they never achieved that brass ring. Minus Davante Adams and working with a broken thumb, Rodgers struggled the most he has since his inaugural season as a starter. It's now time to address Rodgers in this post; I could write an entire entry solely on Rodgers and this past season, but I'll leave it at this: Aaron is my favorite football player of all time. He led the Packers to their greatest stretch of sustained excellence since Vince Lombardi roamed the sidelines, often with depleted rosters around him. In my opinion, hes the most talented QB to play the game. It seems a majority of Packer fans were ready to move on from the man and soured on him this offseason. Personally, I think he will be an MVP contender in NY next year and still love him. But it was time. The Jordan Love era needs to happen, if only for the front office itself needing to justify their faith in the Love pick. Rodgers and the Packers were operating on different timelines the past few years, stuck somewhere between going all in and resetting. The front office has put all their chips in on Jordan Love.
The defense was expected to be a top 5 unit, but regressed heavily. Joe Barry was under scrutiny all year long, seemingly incapable of putting his plethora of first rounders in positions to succeed. A late season push did just enough to save his job (apparently).
Favorite win: Dallas Most frustrating loss: Detroit, week 18
Rodgers's exit also raises an interesting thought: will we see the True Matt LaFleur Offense this season? Offensive deficiencies have been blamed on Lafleur himself or Rodgers's hesitancy at transitioning from a traditional west coast offense to a Shanahan-esque, motion based attack. The answer will be uncovered this year, with Jordan Love having 3 years of experience in the scheme and a first round pedigree. As a Love truther in the pre draft season who hated the pick for the Packers, I am fascinated. This pick will make or break Gute's and Lafleur's tenure.
Aside from the quarterback situation, there are lingering questions concerning LaFleur's ability to lead the team in general. The Packers have consistently laid an egg in one game every season of his tenure and have come up short in the playoffs, with some head scratching decisions rearing their head in crunch time of big games (the end of the Bucs NFC championship the most glaring). I also have questions on his staff hirings/retentions. LaFleur hired 2 dogshit ST coordinators before making the obvious choice of Basaccia. He also chose to retain Joe Barry, noted football terrorist, as defensive coordinator. I've read rumblings that Gute has more say over the staff than the head coach, which is unconfirmed but concerning. I don't mean to dump on LaFleur in this piece, only to emphasize how big of a year this is for him. I think his scheme is sound and the guys play hard for him. With Rodgers gone, I think we see less RPOs and inside zone handoffs to AJ Dillon out of shotgun. The offense will have more identity. But if there are 2 more years without the playoffs in Green Bay, the Cheeseheads will advocate for a new coach.
2023 Draft:
Positions of need: S, TE, WR, DT
Round 1, Pick 13: Lukas Van Ness, Edge, Iowa With the world expecting Jaxon Smith-Njigba, Gute stuck true to his type and drafted athletic freak LVN out of Iowa. Van Ness profiles as a Rashan Gary clone, with a high RAS score and unrefined repertoire of pass rush moves. If he works out like Gary, this is a massive hit. In the pre draft process, the only guy who could have realistically been there for GB that I had above Van Ness was Peter Skoronski. He wasn't there, and there was no doubt in my mind Gute was going for LVN afterwards. He'll rotate with Gary and Preston Smith this year, and will kick inside on certain packages. He makes Smith expendable in the future.
Round 2, Pick 42: Luke Musgrave, TE, Oregon State Musgrave has the size and athleticism to be a game changer at tight end. His tape was short but encouraging. His biggest questions are durability and how he will develop, given his late breakout and immediate injury afterwards. My comparison to his playstyle was Travis Kelce, and if he can approach even 70% of Kelce's production in a season, this is a great pick. The biggest hole on the roster was TE, and I have a feeling Gute got the top one on his board.
Round 2, Pick 50: Jayden Reed, WR, Michigan State The process of this pick was nerve wracking. I was one of many fans pounding the table for Brian Branch, the S out of Alabama. When Gute traded down instead, I was telling friends I hoped he took Jayden Reed, and that's what happened. Reed is smaller receiver who plays bigger than his size on contested catches. He carried the Michigan State offense last year after Kenneth Walker jumped to the NFL. My comparison for him is Tyler Lockett. In Green Bay, Reed will take over the slot role, and I expect him to see around 60% of offensive snaps.
Round 3, Pick 78: Tucker Kraft, TE, South Dakota State Another tight end added to a barren room. The former Jackrabbit is similar to Musgrave in a lot of ways- big, athletic, and a willing albeit unrefined blocker. Kraft's addition along with Musgraves could push the Packers into more 22 personal this season, something LaFleur wants to run but hasnt had the personnel for, and I would not be surprised to see him outsnap Musgrave if he develops quickly. I'm really hoping this is the pick that breaks Green Bays 3rd round curse (seriously look it up its so bad).
Round 4, Pick 116: Colby Wooden, Edge, Auburn A former 4 star recruit at Auburn, Wooden collected 17 sacks as a 3 year starter in the SEC and showed inside/outside versatility. He shows an ability to rush with speed and power, but is inconsistent in his pad level and technique. He anchors well in the run game and showed great gap discipline. I don't see him getting many snaps this year, but if he does I think he takes Kingsley Engabare's role on run downs.
Round 5, Pick 149: Sean Clifford, QB, Penn State A perplexing pick until I saw this man somehow has a 9 RAS. Clifford is an experienced college starter who plays with a clear understanding of his role and a passion for the game. My issues with him were accuracy, arm strength, pocket presence, and decision making. You know, playing quarterback. I did not give Clifford a draftable grade and would have preferred Jaren Hall or Max Duggan. But this is really nit picking over a 5th round pick who was drafted to be a career backup. If the staff sees something in him, I'll give it a chance.
Round 5, Pick 159: Dontayvion Wicks, WR, Virginia A 6'1, 206 lb vertical threat, Wicks was inconsistent in his career at Virginia. If he replicated his 2021 production last year, he might have found himself as a day 2 pick. Alas, a new offense and drops led to his availability at this spot. Wicks has a good release package and the ability to stack DBs and get vertical. His tendencies as a body catcher led to drops last year, and he doesn't provide much after the catch. With his profile, he'll be a WR4/5, but could be a special teams ace very early in his career.
Round 6, Pick 179: Karl Brooks, DL, Bowling Green A bit of a tweener, Brooks is a high motor, high effort pass rusher. He flashes great technique and seems to rush with a plan. He can get washed out in the run game, and will need to commit one way or another to defensive end or defensive tackle. He graded very high from PFF, so that's something. To get on the field, he'll have to show more consistency and ability when anchoring down in the run game.
Round 6, Pick 207: Anders Carlson, K, Auburn Apparently, Mason Crosby's replacement. Anders is the brother of Las Vegas kicker Daniel Carlson, who's pretty damn good. There is a connection with Basaccia there, who's known Anders since high school. I wasn't encouraged by his stats at Auburn, but I'm not going to pretend to be an expert in scouting kickers. If Basaccia says he's that dude, then that dude he is.
Round 7, Pick 232: Carrington Valentine, CB, Kentucky Valentine is a WR convert with a long, slender frame. He is at his best in press man, where he has a variety of ways to get hands on the receiver and reroute him. Unfortunately for Vallentine, Joe Barry hates press man and will kill my family if I suggest it again. Valentine's frame can lead him to get bullied by bigger WRs at times, but he is physical at the catch point. He also brings experience as a productive kick returner, something that could be helpful in the future or even this season if the staff wants to keep Nixon fresh for defensive snaps.
Round 7, Pick 235: Lew Nichols, RB, Central Michigan A big back with some intriguing traits, Nichols enjoyed a very productive 2021 before injuries hampered his 2022. Nichols has good vision, contact balance, and power as a north-south runner. He was productive catching out of the backfield, but wasn't asked to run many routes beyond that. His biggest hurdles in the NFL are going to be elusiveness and speed. He lacks both, but should be a decent backup. For the Packers, they used their RB3 less than maybe any team in the league last year. This will be the Jones&Dillon show again in 2023.
Round 7, Pick 242: Anthony Johnson Jr, S, Iowa State Johnson Jr is a converted cornerback who plays with rare physicality for someone of that description. He did his best work in the box or in the slot at Iowa State, and that may be where the Pack will try to get him some snaps this year. He can be over aggressive in his pursuits at times and take bad angles, but that is coachable. Given the state of the safety room, the 7th round rookie may find himself starting some games this season.
Round 7, Pick 256: Grant DuBose, WR, Charlotte DuBose comes from UNC Charlotte, where there apparently is a football team, and he was 2nd team all C-USA last season. DuBose has excellent size at 6'2, and I love his agility on in-breaking routes crossing the face of safeties. He has experience both outside and in the slot, and is an interesting addition to the WR battle at the bottom of the roster, which is going to be highly competitive. It may come down to how good he can be on special teams. Coaches and teammates rave about his work ethic and love of football, and he worked at Walmart while keeping himself in shape during the Covid year. I'm optimistic he can carve out a role for himself and make the team.
Overall, Gutekunst drafted for need at times in this draft, but still stuck to picking guys that fit his type: big, athletic, and versatile. My biggest shock was not taking a safety until the 7th round, but I think it just never lined up with his board. There was an obvious effort to surround Love with talented pass catchers, which is a breath of fresh air from this team. I was surprised that they didn't take a single offensive linemen, given this is almost certainly Bakh's last year in the green and gold and question marks surrounding some of our young guys, but we drafted 3 linemen last year and the staff may have high hopes for Zach Tom to be the next left tackle. The franchise has earned the benefit of the doubt when it comes to scouting and developing OL.
All told, 2023 is the most excited I've been for a Packer season in a few years. There are so many unknown variables surrounding the team, from Jordan Loves development to LaFleur's offense to Joe Barry's pending glue eating scandal. Media pundits have them ranked somewhere between 20 & 26 in the league hierarchy heading into the year. Personally, I'm a little higher on the Pack, and they will shoot up these rankings if Jordan Love delivers. There's a lot on Love's shoulders. This is the season we've been waiting for with baited breath for 3 years, the post-Rodgers era, and now it's here, for better or worse.
2023.05.29 17:26 LongLiveTurtles Please Help
Hi everyone, I feel hopeless and alone on this. I have been diagnosed with costo since 2019 after falling off a skateboard and landing on my back.
That year was miserable, I had so many flare ups. But after 2020 I wasn’t experiencing many flare ups, occasionally here and there. But not as persistent, in this present moment I have been experiencing a flare up that has been lasting what seems like a week.
I feel a tightness on my sternum, slightly to the left of it. And it causes arm pain as well, I have experienced these symptoms in the past especially with all my previous flare ups. But yet I keep getting terrible anxiety about it, what if it’s my heart? Am I having a heart attack? What if I die right now? What if I don’t act now and go to the ER? I have so many what if thoughts that it’s overtaking my life.
I went to the urgent care and expressed all of my concerns regarding my heart. I’m a 24 (M) who is at a healthy weight and has no family history with heart problems. My parents have high blood pressure and cholesterol but I have been taking care of myself by eating healthy and keeping myself active. So my vitals all look great (the doctor said so) and I’ve done a lipid panel test as well as other blood work and it shows I’m healthy. But yet here I am… panicking of a heart attack. The doctor also performed an ECG on me, came back completely normal.
Why do I keep obsessing over a heart attack? I have been dealing with health anxiety since 2019, but this just feels like the end of me. I keep obsessing over having a heart attack, I even began to experience almost a slight burning sensation slightly to the right of my sternum now and it just worries me.
Anyone able ti offer advice or peace of mind? Please.
submitted by LongLiveTurtles to costochondritis [link] [comments]
That year was miserable, I had so many flare ups. But after 2020 I wasn’t experiencing many flare ups, occasionally here and there. But not as persistent, in this present moment I have been experiencing a flare up that has been lasting what seems like a week.
I feel a tightness on my sternum, slightly to the left of it. And it causes arm pain as well, I have experienced these symptoms in the past especially with all my previous flare ups. But yet I keep getting terrible anxiety about it, what if it’s my heart? Am I having a heart attack? What if I die right now? What if I don’t act now and go to the ER? I have so many what if thoughts that it’s overtaking my life.
I went to the urgent care and expressed all of my concerns regarding my heart. I’m a 24 (M) who is at a healthy weight and has no family history with heart problems. My parents have high blood pressure and cholesterol but I have been taking care of myself by eating healthy and keeping myself active. So my vitals all look great (the doctor said so) and I’ve done a lipid panel test as well as other blood work and it shows I’m healthy. But yet here I am… panicking of a heart attack. The doctor also performed an ECG on me, came back completely normal.
Why do I keep obsessing over a heart attack? I have been dealing with health anxiety since 2019, but this just feels like the end of me. I keep obsessing over having a heart attack, I even began to experience almost a slight burning sensation slightly to the right of my sternum now and it just worries me.
Anyone able ti offer advice or peace of mind? Please.
2023.05.29 17:21 CoastalWitch Teen Jeans Suggestion
I'm in need of another suggestion for those better and more patient with shopping than myself.
What is the best store in West Mobile to buy jeans for some teen boys? They are 12 and 15 years old, in that wierd place between kid and adult sizes. They need to be able to try them on there so it needs to be somewhere with dressing rooms. And, not Walmart.
My last post like this had very helpful responses! Academy ended up being a great place to get swimwear for them!
submitted by CoastalWitch to MobileAL [link] [comments]
What is the best store in West Mobile to buy jeans for some teen boys? They are 12 and 15 years old, in that wierd place between kid and adult sizes. They need to be able to try them on there so it needs to be somewhere with dressing rooms. And, not Walmart.
My last post like this had very helpful responses! Academy ended up being a great place to get swimwear for them!
2023.05.29 17:05 ItsGeoffrey My thoughts of the Playtest, so far.
I want to have my initial thoughts of: I loved this game. So much. It was incredible. I think there was a lot of fun moments of this game. I cannot wait to see what the developers do upon release of the game.
As a streamer (SuperKingNerd on Twitch), my computer usually runs games for stream on high graphics, at times I have to drop it down to medium depending on what's going on or how high of the title there is. When I am not streaming, I can play this game on Ultra, no issues, with zero lag.
The only two games I've had issues with on stream, for whatever reason, was this game and The Evil Dead game. I believe there are definitely some optimization issues with the game as I had to put the game on windowed mode, 1920x1080, at low for it to not stutter anything on my stream's end. I never had issues with the game stopping my stream entirely (unlike The Evil Dead Game), so there's a win in my book, but I could almost barely see the game, and I felt like what I was sharing to my community was not what I usually saw in the game.
The other issue I had was with changing my control setup for my mouse. Nothing I could do would change the middle mouse button - which unfortunately is hit or miss for my setup. This made playing Bubba (or I believe Cook) impossible since I couldn't listen in for any victims. This would have been vital for me to be able to playtest and I really really wanted to playtest both sides.
I am interested to see how the perks will change the game. It's much like any solo or team game where you have really great opponents, or you can speedrun getting out. I think the perks will make this easier / harder depending on what's going on.
I worry about how this game will grow, however. I'm sure the Gun team has already discussed ideas for new content releases, but I feel like story-wise there's a limited amount of things to add and bring to pull players in and constantly keep the community engaged. I know thinking about these things before the game even remotely launches is a bit negative, but I'm just attempting to look ahead.
There are certain bugs that need to be worked out (ie: double models loading before the cutscenes, handstands at the beginning of the game before the models correctly load into their positions, blocking doors fully when they're not supposed to be blocked with the models). I think having playable tutorials would be helpful as well upon full launch. I had a few people come in for stream and ask how they're supposed to play because they couldn't figure the game out and were just getting their shitrocked. Which, fair, so did I my first few games but it is a learning experience. I think the tutorial for the breaker would definitely be useful as I genuinely had no clue how to do it until I watched another streamer do it and I felt like an idiot.
I feel like there's definitely some things that you have to just hope the Family you're playing against as a victim doesn't have their shit fully together - ie: getting the fusebox done and fully booking it downstairs. I also feel like I think we need notification if someone's fucked the fusebox over, because of the fact that I'll get all the way to the door that is opened by the fusebox only to find out that it was fixed by the family. So I have to reset entirely.
In the danger meter sense, as a hard of hearing person, I love this mechanic, however I think sometimes it detects chases above me or movement above me that doesn't actually threaten me at all. This puts me on edge, which is great, however... maybe being able to adjust the sensitivity of it would be beneficial.
This game, currently as it is, is bringing me the same joy that F13 gave me in it's hayday, when all my friends and I were playing it on Playstation. Keep up everything, developers! I just wanted to bring up my overall thoughts.
Thank you for including me on the Playtest!
submitted by ItsGeoffrey to TXChainSawGame [link] [comments]
As a streamer (SuperKingNerd on Twitch), my computer usually runs games for stream on high graphics, at times I have to drop it down to medium depending on what's going on or how high of the title there is. When I am not streaming, I can play this game on Ultra, no issues, with zero lag.
The only two games I've had issues with on stream, for whatever reason, was this game and The Evil Dead game. I believe there are definitely some optimization issues with the game as I had to put the game on windowed mode, 1920x1080, at low for it to not stutter anything on my stream's end. I never had issues with the game stopping my stream entirely (unlike The Evil Dead Game), so there's a win in my book, but I could almost barely see the game, and I felt like what I was sharing to my community was not what I usually saw in the game.
The other issue I had was with changing my control setup for my mouse. Nothing I could do would change the middle mouse button - which unfortunately is hit or miss for my setup. This made playing Bubba (or I believe Cook) impossible since I couldn't listen in for any victims. This would have been vital for me to be able to playtest and I really really wanted to playtest both sides.
I am interested to see how the perks will change the game. It's much like any solo or team game where you have really great opponents, or you can speedrun getting out. I think the perks will make this easier / harder depending on what's going on.
I worry about how this game will grow, however. I'm sure the Gun team has already discussed ideas for new content releases, but I feel like story-wise there's a limited amount of things to add and bring to pull players in and constantly keep the community engaged. I know thinking about these things before the game even remotely launches is a bit negative, but I'm just attempting to look ahead.
There are certain bugs that need to be worked out (ie: double models loading before the cutscenes, handstands at the beginning of the game before the models correctly load into their positions, blocking doors fully when they're not supposed to be blocked with the models). I think having playable tutorials would be helpful as well upon full launch. I had a few people come in for stream and ask how they're supposed to play because they couldn't figure the game out and were just getting their shitrocked. Which, fair, so did I my first few games but it is a learning experience. I think the tutorial for the breaker would definitely be useful as I genuinely had no clue how to do it until I watched another streamer do it and I felt like an idiot.
I feel like there's definitely some things that you have to just hope the Family you're playing against as a victim doesn't have their shit fully together - ie: getting the fusebox done and fully booking it downstairs. I also feel like I think we need notification if someone's fucked the fusebox over, because of the fact that I'll get all the way to the door that is opened by the fusebox only to find out that it was fixed by the family. So I have to reset entirely.
In the danger meter sense, as a hard of hearing person, I love this mechanic, however I think sometimes it detects chases above me or movement above me that doesn't actually threaten me at all. This puts me on edge, which is great, however... maybe being able to adjust the sensitivity of it would be beneficial.
This game, currently as it is, is bringing me the same joy that F13 gave me in it's hayday, when all my friends and I were playing it on Playstation. Keep up everything, developers! I just wanted to bring up my overall thoughts.
Thank you for including me on the Playtest!
2023.05.29 17:00 _call-me-al_ [Mon, May 29 2023] TL;DR — This is what you missed in the last 24 hours on Reddit
If you want to receive this as a daily email in your inbox, you can now join at this link
worldnews
Belarus official: West left us no choice but to deploy nuclear armsComments Link
Wagner boss attacks Russia's defense minister, says his daughter and son-in-law live in luxury while thousands are sent to die in Ukraine
Comments Link
French medical bodies on Sunday called on authorities to punish researcher Didier Raoult for "the largest 'unauthorized' clinical trial ever seen" into the use of hydroxychloroquine to treat Covid-19
Comments Link
news
Illinois to Become First State to Ban Book BansComments Link
Man dies after going days in Duval County jail without medication, family says
Comments Link
Cleveland 19 News receives bomb threat against 5 Targets as stores face LGBTQ+ controversy
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science
Stem cells from the human stomach can be converted into cells that secrete insulin in response to rising blood sugar levels, offering a promising approach to treating diabetes, according to a preclinical studyComments Link
For the first time, astronomers have detected a cyclone on the north pole of Uranus.
Comments Link
The brain’s protein-destruction machine learns new tricks at synapses, revealing a potential target for treating neurological disorders
Comments Link
space
I discovered this planetary nebula using a $500 camera lens, now it carries my nameComments Link
Milky Way framed by Delicate Arch in Arches National Park in Utah
Comments Link
Almost 11 years ago precisely, my crewmates and I captured and docked the very first SpaceX Dragon capsule. Here are some photos I took during the approach. More details in comments.
Comments Link
Futurology
Nvidia CEO Says Those Without AI Expertise Will Be Left BehindComments Link
Study: GPT-4 didn't really score 90th percentile on the bar exam. Implications for the future of the legal profession and AI are discussed.
Comments Link
NVIDIA creates a Minecraft AI that codes and self-improves (using ChatGPT)
Comments Link
AskReddit
What simple mistake has ended lives?Comments Link
What is something that young people love that you don’t understand?
Comments Link
You can permanently change the price of one item to $1. What is it?
Comments Link
todayilearned
TIL of the Jim twins, separated at birth and reunited at 39: both had married and divorced someone named Linda, were currently married to a Betty, had sons named James Allan, had dogs named Toy, drove the same car, had jobs in security, and regularly vacationed at the same beach in FloridaComments Link
TIL that in 67 C.E, Emperor Nero found a Boy named Sporus Who looked Like his deceased Wife, so he had him Castrated, Put in female attire, and made his entire Court play along with the act
Comments Link
TIL Stanford engineers made a folding origami microscope that costs less than $1 to make. 50,000 microscopes were shipped to 130 countries in 2014 to see what people will do with it
Comments Link
dataisbeautiful
Indy 500 Advertisements vs Racing [OC]Comments Link
[OC] Premier League 22/23 table by matchday.
Comments Link
[OC] Some of the top revenue sources for big tech firms
Comments Link
Cooking
Is cooking your Love Language?Comments Link
Rant: I always mess up the food when I’m cooking for larger groups.
Comments Link
What accidental purchase have you made that in now a regular purchase?
Comments Link
food
[homemade] Esquites sweet corn salad (Elote derivative)Comments Link
[homemade] Lasagna
Comments Link
[I ate] Canadian Poutine
Comments Link
movies
A rare 1914 silent film called "The Oath of the Sword" was considered lost forever. A professor rescued it from a vault.Comments Link
Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross Scoring 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem’
Comments Link
What’s a movie that you absolutely love but know will never ever get a sequel or reboot?
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Art
How May I Help You?, Jon Silent, Ink and Acrylic, 2023Comments Link
Eat your water, Alai Ganuza, oil painting, 2023
Comments Link
Vineyard, Olga Rodina, Oils, 2023
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television
Phil Hartman: 25 years after the actor's tragic death, his work still resonatesComments Link
George Maharis Dies: ‘Route 66’ & ‘Fantasy Island’ Actor Was 94
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A bittersweet goodbye to ‘Barry’: The cast on the dramatic turns of the hit man comedy
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pics
Somebody went full math at a casino stairwellComments Link
Sandra Bullock wore “the dress” before JLo did.
Comments Link
Just some finishing touches before we close in the void
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gifs
Good kid spots neighbor's dropped wallet in driveway, returns it.Comments Link
King Cobra vs. Mongoose
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Ship Is Destroyed By Huge Wave During Coastguard Rescue
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educationalgifs
Geological evolution of North America in the last 550 millon yearsComments Link
mildlyinteresting
The core of this rope is made of diapersComments Link
This green stop sign
Comments Link
This vehicle had an extra set of wheels that weren’t touching the ground
Comments Link
interestingasfuck
A full 360 swingComments Link
*Fruit and Vegetable Decomposition Timelapse *
Comments Link
Dry Squirrel Asks Human for a Drink of Water.
Comments Link
funny
Well that mall doesn’t have to mop. The floor is getting done.Comments Link
An old Cricket Wireless was turned into a chicken restaurant in possibly the most lazy/ingenious way possible…
Comments Link
Jesus Christ!
Comments Link
aww
What’s this?Comments Link
Family of racoons in my yard.
Comments Link
I forgot to lock my dorm room and this cat casually opened the door, climbed into my bed and made herself at home
Comments Link
2023.05.29 16:59 MADDL007 H: Weapons, Plans, UNY Armor, Legacy BE50bs Dragon W: Apparel, Masks, Enclave Flamer Mods, UNY/AP/WWR scout armor pieces
Willing to bundle for the items I want.
GT: MADDL007
——Weapons for trade——
AA/50crit/25 Plasma Rifle
AA/50crit/25 Crossbow {mule}
B/E/Break The Dragon 3% Explosive 419 Range (Legacy) {mule} [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
B/50crit/15crit The Fixer
B/50crit/15crit Handmade {mule}
B/50crit/15crit Handmade {mule}
B/50crit/25 Handmade [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
B/E/1A Handmade {mule}
B/50crit/25 Radium Rifle
B/50crit/25 Railway Rifle {mule}
B/50crit/FR Railway Rifle
B/E 50 Cal Machine Gun (2 Star) {mule}
B/50crit/Break Gatling Plasma {mule}
B/50crit/25 Harpoon Gun
B/E Light Machine Gun (2 star) {mule}
B/FSS/Break Chainsaw
B/FSS/1S Death Tambo {mule}
MUT/E/25 Handmade
Q/E/DRWA The Fixer
Q/AP/25 Handmade
Q/E Handmade (2 star)
Q/E Handmade (2 star) {mule}
Q/E/Stealth Handmade
Q/50crit/FMSWA Railway Rifle {mule}
Q/E Railway Rifle (2 Star)
Q/FFR Tesla Rifle (2 Star)
Q/50crit/25 Flamer {mule}
Q/E/1P Gatling Gun {mule}
TS/50vhc Alien Blaster (2 Star)
TS/AP/Stealth Alien Blaster {mule}
TS/LD/Break Alien Blaster
TS/E Handmade (2 star)
V/FFFR Alien Blaster
V/FF25 Gatling Laser
V/E Light Machine Gun (2 star)
V/BASH/FMSWA Minigun {mule}
V/25DAM/1S Chainsaw {mule}
V/40PA/Block Chainsaw
V/AP/RW Chainsaw
Enclave Plasma Rifle #1 w/ Automatic Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight
Enclave Plasma Rifle #2 w/ Stabilized Splitter, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight
Enclave Plasma Rifle #3 w/ Aligned Automatic Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Standard Sights
Enclave Plasma Rifle #4 w/ True Flamer Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight x2
Enclave Plasma Rifle #5 w/ Stabilized Flamer Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight
Enclave Plasma Rifle #6 w/ True Automatic Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight {mule}
Fancy Pump Shotgun AA/LD/DRWA
Fancy Revolvers: Assassin, Berserker, Executioner, Mutant x2, Troubleshooter x3
Tesla (no scope) Level 50 {mule}
Dross, Pearly Peepers, Red Fireworks Mine, Troglocide
——Plans & Recipes for trade——
Plan: Assault Rifle {mule}
Plan: Backpack Armor Plated Mod {mule}
Plan: Backpack High Capacity Mod {mule}
Plan: Backpack Insulated Mod
Plan: Backpack Refrigerated Mod
Plan: Barbed Walking Cane {mule}
Plan: Bear Arm
Plan: Bear Arm Heavy Mod
Plan: Camo Backpack
Plan: Deathclaw Gauntlet {mule}
Plan: Hatchet Electro Fusion {mule}
Plan: Large Ultracite Shard {mule}
Plan: Nuka-World Cowboy Duster {mule}
Plan: Pitchfork Flamer {mule}
Plan: Poker Set {mule}
Plan: Protective Lining Raider Underarmor
Plan: Radioactive Barrel
Plan: Scorchbeast Queen Plushie
Plan: Sheriff’s Hat
Plan: Shielded Lining Marine Underarmor {mule}
Plan: Spiked Walking Cane {mule}
Plan: Tomb Stones
Plan: TV Aquarium {mule}
Plan: T-60 BOS Elder Paint
Plan: Ultracite Calibrated Shocks
Plan: Vintage Water Cooler
Plan: Wild West Show Entrance Sign
Recipe: Cutting Fluid {mule}
Recipe: Formula P {mule}
Recipe: Fried Scorpion On A Stick {mule}
Recipe: Healing Salve (Mire) {mule}
Recipe: Nuka Cola Dark {mule}
Recipe: Stimpak Diffuser {mule}
——Armor & Other items for trade——
UNY/1L/WWR Metal Chest Piece 51DR 11ER {mule}
UNY/1L/WWR Urban Scout Armor Chest Piece {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/1P/WWR Urban Scout Armor Right Arm {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/1S/WWR Leather Left Leg 21DR 51ER {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/AP/WWR Combat Armor Right Leg 27DR 37ER {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/AP/WWR Forest Scout Armor Right Leg [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
UNY/AP/WWR Urban Scout Armor Right Leg [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
UNY/HungeWWR Urban Scour Armor Left Arm {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
W/AP/WWR Raider Left Leg 17DR 8ER
Ultracite Jet Pack Helmet Level 50 {mule}
50K+ Ultracite 5.56 Ammo
All 8 Holotape Mini Games
All Non-Rare apparel available - just ask
Misc Items: ask me for my list
———
———
——Items I want——
B/50crit/25 Fixer or Handmade
Q/E/25 Fixer or Handmade or Railway
TS/50crit/15crit Alien Blaster
TS/50crit/25 Alien Blaster
V/40PA/40PA Chainsaw (Will consider other third star: prefer Break, 90rw, or any of the +1)
Baseball bats level 45 - indigo, pink, yellow
Enclave Plasma Gun Aligned Flamer Barrel Mod (one or multiple)
UNY/AP/WWR Forest Scout Armor Chest Piece, Left Arm
UNY/AP/WWR Urban Scout Armor Left Leg and Right Arm
Plan: Meat Tenderizer
Asylum Worker Uniform Forest
Asylum Worker Uniform Red
Asylum Worker Uniform Yellow
Blue Ridge Caravan Gas Mask (will pay caps)
Blue Ridge Caravan Uniform (will pay caps)
BOS Jumpsuit
Fasnacht Brahmin Mask
Fasnacht Buffoon Mask
Fasnacht Crazy Guy Mask
Fasnacht Deathclaw Mask
Fasnacht Demon Mask
Fasnacht Fiend Mask
Fasnacht Hag Mask
Fasnacht Loon Mask
Fasnacht Raven Mask
Fasnacht Winter Man Mask
Forest Camo Jumpsuit
Forest Scout Armor Mask
Leather Coat
Prototype Hazmat Suit Level 50
Radicals Face Mask
Responder Fireman Helmet
Responder Fireman Uniform
Tattered Field Jacket
Traveling Leather Coat
Urban Scout Armor Mask
White Powder Jumpsuit
I’m really only after the items listed above, make me an offer. No caps, flux, or junk offers please.
submitted by MADDL007 to Market76 [link] [comments]
GT: MADDL007
——Weapons for trade——
AA/50crit/25 Plasma Rifle
AA/50crit/25 Crossbow {mule}
B/E/Break The Dragon 3% Explosive 419 Range (Legacy) {mule} [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
B/50crit/15crit The Fixer
B/50crit/15crit Handmade {mule}
B/50crit/15crit Handmade {mule}
B/50crit/25 Handmade [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
B/E/1A Handmade {mule}
B/50crit/25 Radium Rifle
B/50crit/25 Railway Rifle {mule}
B/50crit/FR Railway Rifle
B/E 50 Cal Machine Gun (2 Star) {mule}
B/50crit/Break Gatling Plasma {mule}
B/50crit/25 Harpoon Gun
B/E Light Machine Gun (2 star) {mule}
B/FSS/Break Chainsaw
B/FSS/1S Death Tambo {mule}
MUT/E/25 Handmade
Q/E/DRWA The Fixer
Q/AP/25 Handmade
Q/E Handmade (2 star)
Q/E Handmade (2 star) {mule}
Q/E/Stealth Handmade
Q/50crit/FMSWA Railway Rifle {mule}
Q/E Railway Rifle (2 Star)
Q/FFR Tesla Rifle (2 Star)
Q/50crit/25 Flamer {mule}
Q/E/1P Gatling Gun {mule}
TS/50vhc Alien Blaster (2 Star)
TS/AP/Stealth Alien Blaster {mule}
TS/LD/Break Alien Blaster
TS/E Handmade (2 star)
V/FFFR Alien Blaster
V/FF25 Gatling Laser
V/E Light Machine Gun (2 star)
V/BASH/FMSWA Minigun {mule}
V/25DAM/1S Chainsaw {mule}
V/40PA/Block Chainsaw
V/AP/RW Chainsaw
Enclave Plasma Rifle #1 w/ Automatic Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight
Enclave Plasma Rifle #2 w/ Stabilized Splitter, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight
Enclave Plasma Rifle #3 w/ Aligned Automatic Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Standard Sights
Enclave Plasma Rifle #4 w/ True Flamer Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight x2
Enclave Plasma Rifle #5 w/ Stabilized Flamer Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight
Enclave Plasma Rifle #6 w/ True Automatic Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Reflex Sight {mule}
Fancy Pump Shotgun AA/LD/DRWA
Fancy Revolvers: Assassin, Berserker, Executioner, Mutant x2, Troubleshooter x3
Tesla (no scope) Level 50 {mule}
Dross, Pearly Peepers, Red Fireworks Mine, Troglocide
——Plans & Recipes for trade——
Plan: Assault Rifle {mule}
Plan: Backpack Armor Plated Mod {mule}
Plan: Backpack High Capacity Mod {mule}
Plan: Backpack Insulated Mod
Plan: Backpack Refrigerated Mod
Plan: Barbed Walking Cane {mule}
Plan: Bear Arm
Plan: Bear Arm Heavy Mod
Plan: Camo Backpack
Plan: Deathclaw Gauntlet {mule}
Plan: Hatchet Electro Fusion {mule}
Plan: Large Ultracite Shard {mule}
Plan: Nuka-World Cowboy Duster {mule}
Plan: Pitchfork Flamer {mule}
Plan: Poker Set {mule}
Plan: Protective Lining Raider Underarmor
Plan: Radioactive Barrel
Plan: Scorchbeast Queen Plushie
Plan: Sheriff’s Hat
Plan: Shielded Lining Marine Underarmor {mule}
Plan: Spiked Walking Cane {mule}
Plan: Tomb Stones
Plan: TV Aquarium {mule}
Plan: T-60 BOS Elder Paint
Plan: Ultracite Calibrated Shocks
Plan: Vintage Water Cooler
Plan: Wild West Show Entrance Sign
Recipe: Cutting Fluid {mule}
Recipe: Formula P {mule}
Recipe: Fried Scorpion On A Stick {mule}
Recipe: Healing Salve (Mire) {mule}
Recipe: Nuka Cola Dark {mule}
Recipe: Stimpak Diffuser {mule}
——Armor & Other items for trade——
UNY/1L/WWR Metal Chest Piece 51DR 11ER {mule}
UNY/1L/WWR Urban Scout Armor Chest Piece {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/1P/WWR Urban Scout Armor Right Arm {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/1S/WWR Leather Left Leg 21DR 51ER {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/AP/WWR Combat Armor Right Leg 27DR 37ER {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
UNY/AP/WWR Forest Scout Armor Right Leg [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
UNY/AP/WWR Urban Scout Armor Right Leg [high end apparel bundle or armor from my want list only please]
UNY/HungeWWR Urban Scour Armor Left Arm {mule} [armor from my want list only please]
W/AP/WWR Raider Left Leg 17DR 8ER
Ultracite Jet Pack Helmet Level 50 {mule}
50K+ Ultracite 5.56 Ammo
All 8 Holotape Mini Games
All Non-Rare apparel available - just ask
Misc Items: ask me for my list
———
———
——Items I want——
B/50crit/25 Fixer or Handmade
Q/E/25 Fixer or Handmade or Railway
TS/50crit/15crit Alien Blaster
TS/50crit/25 Alien Blaster
V/40PA/40PA Chainsaw (Will consider other third star: prefer Break, 90rw, or any of the +1)
Baseball bats level 45 - indigo, pink, yellow
Enclave Plasma Gun Aligned Flamer Barrel Mod (one or multiple)
UNY/AP/WWR Forest Scout Armor Chest Piece, Left Arm
UNY/AP/WWR Urban Scout Armor Left Leg and Right Arm
Plan: Meat Tenderizer
Asylum Worker Uniform Forest
Asylum Worker Uniform Red
Asylum Worker Uniform Yellow
Blue Ridge Caravan Gas Mask (will pay caps)
Blue Ridge Caravan Uniform (will pay caps)
BOS Jumpsuit
Fasnacht Brahmin Mask
Fasnacht Buffoon Mask
Fasnacht Crazy Guy Mask
Fasnacht Deathclaw Mask
Fasnacht Demon Mask
Fasnacht Fiend Mask
Fasnacht Hag Mask
Fasnacht Loon Mask
Fasnacht Raven Mask
Fasnacht Winter Man Mask
Forest Camo Jumpsuit
Forest Scout Armor Mask
Leather Coat
Prototype Hazmat Suit Level 50
Radicals Face Mask
Responder Fireman Helmet
Responder Fireman Uniform
Tattered Field Jacket
Traveling Leather Coat
Urban Scout Armor Mask
White Powder Jumpsuit
I’m really only after the items listed above, make me an offer. No caps, flux, or junk offers please.
2023.05.29 16:48 Ilovecoloring122 its not worth even discussing
Over the years my ex has been very hostile, but a more subtle thing she does is has this attitude of "check with me" for things during my time with the kids. Small items maybe but thats not the point, like it used to to be pissed off when i would take the kids somewhere but wouldn't tell her where we were going.One time she called me for something while i was on my way out of town (the town we both lived in) she asked me to bring her something i said no, cause i was not in town. She then flipped out demanding i tell her "where are you taking my kids" its like fuck off, there my kids and its my time.
She would do things like this all the time, one time i was running a few min behind and got stuck behind a freight train which would easily add like 10 min, so i called her and let her know, she then got pissed off because "if your coming from your place to mine you shouldn't hit any train tracks, where are you coming from". and my personal favorite
I picked the kids up, then a few min later i texted her about something i cant remember, she then got pissed off cause she thought i was texting and driving (which is fair) i said im not driving im at the gas station. She then demanded i send her a picture of me at the gas station as proof or she would contact her lawyer....again prior posts shows how delusional she is but these are just some examples of her being insane.
So now, i just dont tell her things she does not need to know in this vein cause its not even worth it. Today i drop the kids off to her and get home to a nasty text about my son not going to school friday, (his sister was sick and he had a half day, as well as a slight fever himself so i called him in for the day)
She is pissed off cause i didint "update her" i was going to text her back and go into why, but then i just decided to not do that, cause no matter what i say its going to end in an argument, she wont believe me, and it is just not worth it.
I am all for keeping the other parent updated on things, but stuff like this i dont think is vital to share especially due to her actions in the past, its just not worth the argument
She also knew my daughter was sick ahead of time.
submitted by Ilovecoloring122 to offmychest [link] [comments]
She would do things like this all the time, one time i was running a few min behind and got stuck behind a freight train which would easily add like 10 min, so i called her and let her know, she then got pissed off because "if your coming from your place to mine you shouldn't hit any train tracks, where are you coming from". and my personal favorite
I picked the kids up, then a few min later i texted her about something i cant remember, she then got pissed off cause she thought i was texting and driving (which is fair) i said im not driving im at the gas station. She then demanded i send her a picture of me at the gas station as proof or she would contact her lawyer....again prior posts shows how delusional she is but these are just some examples of her being insane.
So now, i just dont tell her things she does not need to know in this vein cause its not even worth it. Today i drop the kids off to her and get home to a nasty text about my son not going to school friday, (his sister was sick and he had a half day, as well as a slight fever himself so i called him in for the day)
She is pissed off cause i didint "update her" i was going to text her back and go into why, but then i just decided to not do that, cause no matter what i say its going to end in an argument, she wont believe me, and it is just not worth it.
I am all for keeping the other parent updated on things, but stuff like this i dont think is vital to share especially due to her actions in the past, its just not worth the argument
She also knew my daughter was sick ahead of time.
2023.05.29 16:48 lennonfenton Investment Advice for ~$70k
Hello, seeking investment advice for a friend who does not use Reddit.
They are recieving approximately 70k and would like to know how best to manage this money.
Please let me know if there is any additional info needed.
Thank you!
submitted by lennonfenton to PersonalFinanceCanada [link] [comments]
They are recieving approximately 70k and would like to know how best to manage this money.
- 34 year old female, Ontario
- Currently rents for $300/month but this is temporary and will end soon
- owns their vehicle outright, relatively new
- earns ~60k/year, works in fundraising and community development not for profit
- assume good credit ~700-750
- not sure where they want to live short or long term, considering moving out west with goal to shift employment to improve income
- does not want to recklessly spend, probably take a small trip between switching jobs but otherwise 70k is available purely for investment
- looking for longer term strategy but with the consideration that funds could be available if in the next several years they wanted to buy a home wherever they end up
Please let me know if there is any additional info needed.
Thank you!
2023.05.29 16:47 Goldman_Sharks Why you should always bet on the team coming from the Upper finals
Hi everyone! It's been a little while since I last posted a quick analysis.
A lot of you might read the title and furiously type "but Moist in London!!1": I encourage you to keep reading.
Previously (post 1, post 2) I tried my best to analyze theoretical win rates from different best of series formats (mainly Bo5 & Bo7), and how EU and NA teams performed against each other and compared to these expected values during the last Winter Split.
This time I wanted to focus on the double elimination where the Grand Final has the possibility of having a "bracket reset" if the team coming from the Lower Bracket wins the first Bo7 in the Grand Finals. If the team coming from the Upper Bracket wins any of the 2 Bo7s, they win the Grand Final.
As a casual viewer betting critical Twitch chat points on the main Rocket League channel, I always felt that it intuitively did not make any sense to ever bet on the team challenging the Upper Bracket "winner", given that on even odds, the "favorite" team has 75% chance of winning the Grand Final. Here are the possible events for the Upper Bracket team:
It is possible to math out the probability of winning the series based on the expected strength of each team (proxied by the chance to win a single game (GW%)).
In doing so, it appears that even a much weaker team (with ~40% chance of winning any given single game) has ~50% chance of winning the Grand Final if they come from the Upper Bracket (see the gold star below):
Chances of winning various series formats based on single-game win probability
The blue star represents the 50%/75% "even odds" threshold that I mentioned above.
Symmetrically using the red line, winning a Grand Final from the Lower bracket is challenging as you need to overcome such a disadvantage (need 60% GW to get to 50% series winrate, etc.).
It is worth noting that the team coming from the Upper Bracket is usually the strongest team, which means that 75% chance is likely to be a lower bound.
In coin flip scenarios, the lower bracket team will still win 1 in 4 Grand Final, and it might just be what happened to Moist last year during the Spring Major of 2021-2022 in London. I won't speculate on whether Moist had more or less than 50% chance of winning each game against Falcons, but Moist winning was always a possibility that can be later rationalized with hindsight ("Moist had Falcons's number", "Falcon's mental was chalked after losing in Game 7 in the first Bo7", etc.).
To illustrate how rare this event is (Lower bracket team winning the Grand Final), here are the outcomes of the last EU, NA and the 2021-2022 Spring Major double elimination format:
(apologies for the lack of other regions, I only really follow NA & EU and it would be time consuming to fetch all results manually)
As we can see here, only in 1 out of 10 Grand Finals did we see the Lower bracket team win it all, in a way that only this format makes it possible, which created a memorable and epic storyline.
I won't over-analyze this small sample size too much, but the fact that this was so rare in the past year, alongside the fact that bracket resets are in the minority (3 / 10 in this sample) suggests that the team coming from the Upper bracket is likely to be the stronger one, which would also track with why they came from there in the first place.
submitted by Goldman_Sharks to RocketLeagueEsports [link] [comments]
A lot of you might read the title and furiously type "but Moist in London!!1": I encourage you to keep reading.
Previously (post 1, post 2) I tried my best to analyze theoretical win rates from different best of series formats (mainly Bo5 & Bo7), and how EU and NA teams performed against each other and compared to these expected values during the last Winter Split.
This time I wanted to focus on the double elimination where the Grand Final has the possibility of having a "bracket reset" if the team coming from the Lower Bracket wins the first Bo7 in the Grand Finals. If the team coming from the Upper Bracket wins any of the 2 Bo7s, they win the Grand Final.
As a casual viewer betting critical Twitch chat points on the main Rocket League channel, I always felt that it intuitively did not make any sense to ever bet on the team challenging the Upper Bracket "winner", given that on even odds, the "favorite" team has 75% chance of winning the Grand Final. Here are the possible events for the Upper Bracket team:
- Lose then Lose
- Lose then Win
- Win "then Lose"
- Win "then Win"
It is possible to math out the probability of winning the series based on the expected strength of each team (proxied by the chance to win a single game (GW%)).
In doing so, it appears that even a much weaker team (with ~40% chance of winning any given single game) has ~50% chance of winning the Grand Final if they come from the Upper Bracket (see the gold star below):
Chances of winning various series formats based on single-game win probability
The blue star represents the 50%/75% "even odds" threshold that I mentioned above.
Symmetrically using the red line, winning a Grand Final from the Lower bracket is challenging as you need to overcome such a disadvantage (need 60% GW to get to 50% series winrate, etc.).
It is worth noting that the team coming from the Upper Bracket is usually the strongest team, which means that 75% chance is likely to be a lower bound.
What about Moist in London in 2021-2022?
While the distribution above suggests that the Upper bracket team is largely favorited, the outcome of a Grand Final is never guaranteed.In coin flip scenarios, the lower bracket team will still win 1 in 4 Grand Final, and it might just be what happened to Moist last year during the Spring Major of 2021-2022 in London. I won't speculate on whether Moist had more or less than 50% chance of winning each game against Falcons, but Moist winning was always a possibility that can be later rationalized with hindsight ("Moist had Falcons's number", "Falcon's mental was chalked after losing in Game 7 in the first Bo7", etc.).
To illustrate how rare this event is (Lower bracket team winning the Grand Final), here are the outcomes of the last EU, NA and the 2021-2022 Spring Major double elimination format:
(apologies for the lack of other regions, I only really follow NA & EU and it would be time consuming to fetch all results manually)
| Spring event | Score (UF team first) | Bracket reset | Winner |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2021-2022 NA 1 | G2 1 - 1 SSG | Yes | Upper |
| 2021-2022 EU 1 | BDS 1 - 0 Moist | No | Upper |
| 2021-2022 NA 2 | G2 1 - 0 Version1 | No | Upper |
| 2021-2022 EU 2 | BDS 1 - 0 Liquid | No | Upper |
| 2021-2022 NA 3 | FaZe 1 - 1 G2 | Yes | Upper |
| 2021-2022 EU 3 | Moist 1 - 0 BDS | No | Upper |
| 2021-2022 Major | Falcons 0 - 2 Moist | Yes | Lower |
| NA Open | Complexity 1 - 0 | No | Upper |
| EU Open | Vitality 1 - 0 Liquid | No | Upper |
| NA Cup | Version1 1 - 0 FaZe | No | Upper |
I won't over-analyze this small sample size too much, but the fact that this was so rare in the past year, alongside the fact that bracket resets are in the minority (3 / 10 in this sample) suggests that the team coming from the Upper bracket is likely to be the stronger one, which would also track with why they came from there in the first place.
2023.05.29 16:43 pinkmoonbaby I’m looking for hiking shoe recommendations!
I’m a bit of a novice hiker, and I live in West Texas, so I’m typically covering super rocky terrain with lots of sharp gravel and cacti. Right now I’m using Columbia’s Newton Ridge boot but I can’t stand them- They’re hot and heavy and by the end of the hike they have my toes crushed together and covered in blisters. That being said, I appreciate how much ankle support they have and how durable they are- I don’t have to worry about thorns or cactus bits piercing through the sole.
So I’m wondering if anyone has any recommendations for a boot or shoe that’s lightweight and flexible enough for hot summer hiking in the desert, without losing durability or ankle support? Thanks!
submitted by pinkmoonbaby to hiking [link] [comments]
So I’m wondering if anyone has any recommendations for a boot or shoe that’s lightweight and flexible enough for hot summer hiking in the desert, without losing durability or ankle support? Thanks!
2023.05.29 16:33 Weston_klauer Came down to the last second
 | Overtime and los angeles barely winning. submitted by Weston_klauer to HoopLand [link] [comments] |
2023.05.29 16:28 hillenium Does Every Culture and Civilization Have Monotheistic Roots?
By:Bheria
May 25, 2023
Islam, as a system or way of life that imposes itself as being the obvious truth, necessarily makes many claims and propositions.
One of these is that it is the last revealed religion, as we had discussed in a recent article.
Another claim is that all human communities were greeted by messengers and prophets who taught them Tawhid (pure monotheism) before they innovated and corrupted the original message, birthing the cults and religions we have today.
Among the many Qur’anic verses on the subject, including the following:
Due to this, many Muslims have sought to “recuperate” some religions and even religious figures. For example, many have supposed that Zoroaster, the founder (or more correctly the Mazdean reformer) of Iran’s main pre-Islamic religion might have been a prophet. Similarly, the late Muhammad Hamidullah—the prolific and polyglot Indian-born pioneer of Islamic Studies in France—famously suggested in the explanatory notes to his translation of the Qur’an into French (the first by a Muslim) that the historical Buddha (Siddhartha Gautama) may also have been a prophet (those who speculate regarding the supposed potential prophethood of the historical Buddha tend to look at Surah 95).
RELATED: The Traditional Buddhist View of Women: Feminists Beware
Of course, they all remain cautious and speak only in terms of hypotheticals. This is because we simply cannot assert that any such figure was a prophet or messenger of Allah without the existence of solid grounds for such a claim within the Qur’an or Ahadith (prophetic narrations).
But Muslims are not alone in trying to trace the monotheistic roots of the world religions. Once upon a time, Western anthropologists were immersed in this venture too.
The first modern proponent of this idea was the Scottish poet Andrew Lang, who was active during the second half of the 19th century.
These were the decades in which Darwin and his theories were slowly encroaching the Western intellectual discourse and public imagination. Due to this evolutionary approach, the “simple” religion was viewed as just a form of adaptation to the society itself, and when the society evolved, the religion evolved along with it. Monotheism was thus considered to have followed “primitive polytheism,” which is often equated with tribal cults and animism.
Edward Burnett Tylor—perhaps the foremost acclaimed British anthropologist of his days—was someone who propagated such an evolutionist approach, to the extent that he could potentially be regarded as the spiritual father figure of evolutionary anthropology, if not the entire field of modern anthropology. In fact, it was Tylor who popularized the term animism within the public discourse.
It is not difficult to guess the ideological underpinnings of Tylor’s worldview. He lived at a time when the British Empire was at its peak, and by saying that polytheists are uncivilized by virtue of their belief system, he was essentially justifying British imperialism.
On the other hand, Andrew Lang, who was Tylor’s student and disciple, disagreed. He believed that monotheism is not merely some sort of evolution which tells us about a society’s so-called complexity but rather that it is a concept of its own right. According to him, it was not something to be used for differentiating some “savages” from the “civilized” crowd.
Lang even debated directly with Tylor on this issue, arguing that the idea of a Supreme Being, creator, benevolent, source of morality, etc., is the default position so to speak, not some sort of animism.
Lang looked at the Australian Aboriginals in particular and their concept of the “sky father,” Baiame.
During the 20th century, many would actively promote this idea of primitive monotheism. Included among them were famous anthropologists such as Paul Radin, who was one of the most influential American anthropologists of the first half of the last century, having studied Native Americans in particular.
But the most important figure was someone named Wilhelm Schmidt, a Catholic priest from Germany. Over the course of four decades (1910s–1950s), he compiled a 12-volume work entitled The Origin of the Idea of God.
To get a basic idea regarding the scope of this work, we can read the following summary of its main thesis (albeit with some criticism) by Stanley Arthur Cook, who was a professor of Hebrew at Cambridge. He writes in his article “Primitive Monotheism” (1931), published in The Journal of Theological Studies (p.2):
This idea of “primitive monotheism” is no longer popular in Western anthropology, due primarily to the secularization of the West. The concept of primitive monotheism is considered to be too indebted to a Eurocentric and even Christianized definition of religion. What is preferred now is the “phenomenological” approach. This is the idea of learning a religion directly from its adherents, without superimposing Western concepts onto it.
Such a methodologically secular and even postcolonialist approach is quite clear in James L. Cox’s 2014 book, The Invention of God in Indigenous Societies.
Yet even if the interpretation were to differ, the ethnological data remains. Furthermore, the interpretation of the adherents themselves may itself indicate towards primitive monotheism. For example, this was the case with Hehaka Sapa (also known as Black Elk), a Native American religious figure who said that the concept of Wakan-Tanka (“The Great Mysterious”)—found in varying forms in virtually all Native American shamanism—contained a belief in the Supreme Being, though in a pantheistic way. This is quite clear in his discussions with ethnologist Joseph Epes Brown.
In Black Africa, the Shona people of Zimbabwe believe in Mwari, a Supreme Creator (though one that has a sort of internal duality); in Latin America, the Aztecs have Ometeotl; and pre-Islamic Iranics who didn’t accept Zoroaster’s reforms have Zurvan. All of them believe in a sort of unique Supreme Creator. However, their belief in this Supreme Creator includes a belief in there being some sort of internal duality within them. This would, of course, mean that their initial beliefs had already been corrupted.
We could go on providing numerous other examples—and Schmidt has already covered pretty much all he could for every continent—but the point is this:
Despite this belief having been polluted in many cases (with that pollution later degenerating into different forms of polytheism, including animism), every civilization and culture seems to have held a belief in the idea of some kind of unique Supreme Being.
It thus seems that the Qur’anic claim of every human society being graced with some divine message resonates with anthropological research. Of course, this is not to say that there was ever any doubt regarding the veracity of the Qur’an’s claims to begin with; or that the Qur’an needs any sort of support or validation from contemporary sciences.
But, that being said, all of this should serve to make us more conscious and appreciative of Tawhid and Iman (faith), along with our own individual and even societal approach to them. Let us be grateful to Allah for endowing upon us these great blessings by increasing in our worship and devotion.
RELATED: The Genius of Islam Episode 3, The Curse of Polytheism
submitted by hillenium to TraditionalMuslims [link] [comments]
May 25, 2023
Islam, as a system or way of life that imposes itself as being the obvious truth, necessarily makes many claims and propositions.
One of these is that it is the last revealed religion, as we had discussed in a recent article.
Another claim is that all human communities were greeted by messengers and prophets who taught them Tawhid (pure monotheism) before they innovated and corrupted the original message, birthing the cults and religions we have today.
Among the many Qur’anic verses on the subject, including the following:
Indeed, We have sent forth among every community a messenger [with the commandment]: You shall worship Allah [alone] and shun [all] false deities [and objects of worship]! So among them were those [people] whom Allah guided [aright]. And among them were those who [persistently rejected guidance. Thus they] deservedly remained astray. So journey in the earth, and see how [devastating] was the end of those who belied Allah! (Qur’an, 16:36)Under the explanation of this verse, Ibn Kathir writes in his Tafsir:
Allah continued sending Messengers to mankind with this Message, from the first incidence of Shirk that appeared among the Children of Adam, in the people to whom Nuh was sent—the first Messenger sent by Allah to the people of this earth—until He sent the final Messenger, Muhammad ﷺ, whose call was addressed to both men and Jinn, in the east and in the west.The inference from such information is that all communities were taught about Tawhid and that, despite the now deformed message, it may still feature some features of the original monotheism that they were supposed to maintain.
Due to this, many Muslims have sought to “recuperate” some religions and even religious figures. For example, many have supposed that Zoroaster, the founder (or more correctly the Mazdean reformer) of Iran’s main pre-Islamic religion might have been a prophet. Similarly, the late Muhammad Hamidullah—the prolific and polyglot Indian-born pioneer of Islamic Studies in France—famously suggested in the explanatory notes to his translation of the Qur’an into French (the first by a Muslim) that the historical Buddha (Siddhartha Gautama) may also have been a prophet (those who speculate regarding the supposed potential prophethood of the historical Buddha tend to look at Surah 95).
RELATED: The Traditional Buddhist View of Women: Feminists Beware
Of course, they all remain cautious and speak only in terms of hypotheticals. This is because we simply cannot assert that any such figure was a prophet or messenger of Allah without the existence of solid grounds for such a claim within the Qur’an or Ahadith (prophetic narrations).
But Muslims are not alone in trying to trace the monotheistic roots of the world religions. Once upon a time, Western anthropologists were immersed in this venture too.
“Primitive Monotheism” in Western Anthropology
“Primitive monotheism” is basically the idea that all communities essentially began as monotheistic prior to degenerating into different forms of polytheism.The first modern proponent of this idea was the Scottish poet Andrew Lang, who was active during the second half of the 19th century.
These were the decades in which Darwin and his theories were slowly encroaching the Western intellectual discourse and public imagination. Due to this evolutionary approach, the “simple” religion was viewed as just a form of adaptation to the society itself, and when the society evolved, the religion evolved along with it. Monotheism was thus considered to have followed “primitive polytheism,” which is often equated with tribal cults and animism.
Edward Burnett Tylor—perhaps the foremost acclaimed British anthropologist of his days—was someone who propagated such an evolutionist approach, to the extent that he could potentially be regarded as the spiritual father figure of evolutionary anthropology, if not the entire field of modern anthropology. In fact, it was Tylor who popularized the term animism within the public discourse.
It is not difficult to guess the ideological underpinnings of Tylor’s worldview. He lived at a time when the British Empire was at its peak, and by saying that polytheists are uncivilized by virtue of their belief system, he was essentially justifying British imperialism.
On the other hand, Andrew Lang, who was Tylor’s student and disciple, disagreed. He believed that monotheism is not merely some sort of evolution which tells us about a society’s so-called complexity but rather that it is a concept of its own right. According to him, it was not something to be used for differentiating some “savages” from the “civilized” crowd.
Lang even debated directly with Tylor on this issue, arguing that the idea of a Supreme Being, creator, benevolent, source of morality, etc., is the default position so to speak, not some sort of animism.
Lang looked at the Australian Aboriginals in particular and their concept of the “sky father,” Baiame.
During the 20th century, many would actively promote this idea of primitive monotheism. Included among them were famous anthropologists such as Paul Radin, who was one of the most influential American anthropologists of the first half of the last century, having studied Native Americans in particular.
But the most important figure was someone named Wilhelm Schmidt, a Catholic priest from Germany. Over the course of four decades (1910s–1950s), he compiled a 12-volume work entitled The Origin of the Idea of God.
To get a basic idea regarding the scope of this work, we can read the following summary of its main thesis (albeit with some criticism) by Stanley Arthur Cook, who was a professor of Hebrew at Cambridge. He writes in his article “Primitive Monotheism” (1931), published in The Journal of Theological Studies (p.2):
From the evidence for the prevalence of beliefs in High Gods or Supreme Beings among people who are ‘ethnologically’ primitive, Father Schmidt argues that a monotheism of a strikingly pure character distinguished the very beginning of the history of religion but has been overlaid by the less pure when not degraded cults of peoples living at higher stages of developement. […] From his survey of the peoples who are held to be ethnologically primitive, Father Schmidt constructs a picture of the worship of a Supreme Being, a personality transcending all experience, omnipotent, universal cause and creator, omniscient, beneficent, all righteous, father, giver of moral law, and the centre of cult. These Primitives include pygmies, Tasmanians, Algonkins, Eskimo, etc., and are food-hunters. Above them in the scale are the Primary peoples, living at the stage where man exploits nature. They fall into three classes, each with religious characteristics : (a) matrilineal, agriculturists (with lunar ideas, mother goddesses), (b) patrilineal, totemists (solar ideas; men are prominent), and (c) patrilineal, nomads (sky-gods, social hierarchy). Next, with all sorts of complex crossings come the Secondary and Tertiary cultures, the latter comprising the old civilizations of Asia, Europe, and America.RELATED: Sikhism’s Dubious Monotheism – Between Auto-Deification and Book Worship
This idea of “primitive monotheism” is no longer popular in Western anthropology, due primarily to the secularization of the West. The concept of primitive monotheism is considered to be too indebted to a Eurocentric and even Christianized definition of religion. What is preferred now is the “phenomenological” approach. This is the idea of learning a religion directly from its adherents, without superimposing Western concepts onto it.
Such a methodologically secular and even postcolonialist approach is quite clear in James L. Cox’s 2014 book, The Invention of God in Indigenous Societies.
Yet even if the interpretation were to differ, the ethnological data remains. Furthermore, the interpretation of the adherents themselves may itself indicate towards primitive monotheism. For example, this was the case with Hehaka Sapa (also known as Black Elk), a Native American religious figure who said that the concept of Wakan-Tanka (“The Great Mysterious”)—found in varying forms in virtually all Native American shamanism—contained a belief in the Supreme Being, though in a pantheistic way. This is quite clear in his discussions with ethnologist Joseph Epes Brown.
In Black Africa, the Shona people of Zimbabwe believe in Mwari, a Supreme Creator (though one that has a sort of internal duality); in Latin America, the Aztecs have Ometeotl; and pre-Islamic Iranics who didn’t accept Zoroaster’s reforms have Zurvan. All of them believe in a sort of unique Supreme Creator. However, their belief in this Supreme Creator includes a belief in there being some sort of internal duality within them. This would, of course, mean that their initial beliefs had already been corrupted.
We could go on providing numerous other examples—and Schmidt has already covered pretty much all he could for every continent—but the point is this:
Despite this belief having been polluted in many cases (with that pollution later degenerating into different forms of polytheism, including animism), every civilization and culture seems to have held a belief in the idea of some kind of unique Supreme Being.
It thus seems that the Qur’anic claim of every human society being graced with some divine message resonates with anthropological research. Of course, this is not to say that there was ever any doubt regarding the veracity of the Qur’an’s claims to begin with; or that the Qur’an needs any sort of support or validation from contemporary sciences.
But, that being said, all of this should serve to make us more conscious and appreciative of Tawhid and Iman (faith), along with our own individual and even societal approach to them. Let us be grateful to Allah for endowing upon us these great blessings by increasing in our worship and devotion.
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