Hello everyone I hope you’re okay. I was just playing FIFA and boom a big palpitation hit I started to panic felt lightheaded because I was holding my breath because I was so tense and then calmed down. I have had my heart checked 7 times 2 of which are private best testing ones and it’s perfect so I know it’s not going to harm me but still catches me off guard I think it’s more of the fact I was leaning forward that it felt harder and the fact I was breathing in lol. Anyway ! I was laying in bed thinking I need to just once and for all get over all of the symptoms that are making me scared of being I’ll and dying. How can I do that ???? GET OVER MY FEAR OF DYING now I’m not saying I’m perfectly fine with death because I am not but I just thought to myself I can’t stop death and I just need to accept it. If there isn’t a god I won’t know about dying after if there is a God I could go to heaven which is great and who knows I could reincarnate and live life again. We don’t know so it’s the anxiety of not knowing which scares me and leaving my family behind. Like I say I’m a healthy 22 year old male with NO health conditions death can happen at anytime and could happen the next minute but for my age and health it is unlikely but never zero. Now I’m religious and I am sort of anxious in my mind that God is trying to get me to accept death so I can die soon lol but I don’t wanna die soon that’s why I’m scared off. That’s just my anxious mind thinking right ? I guess the positive way of looking at it is that God is getting me to get over my fear of death so I can live the LONG HAPPY HEALTHY LIFE that he put out for me. Can anyone help me accept death even more ?

Ok so I’m playing on Miami and one of my main objectives is to kill a target by drowning them. I had 4 targets and I threw 2 of them into bodies of water yet NONE OF THEM counted as a “drowning kill.” What the heck?! First target I lured to the edge of the water and threw a hard melee object at him, causing him to fall in the water. The counter under drowning kill came up, did the whole 0:02, 0:01 thing and then nothing!! So ok I go to my next target and she’s by the fish tanks. I throw her ass in the fish tank and same thing!!
How are these not counting as drowning when they are actually dying by drowning? I already reported it to IO, so hopefully they’ll fix this nonsense; probably not, though!
How else can you complete this objective other than shoving their face into a toilet? This is especially hard on maps like Miami where if you use any type of emetic on someone, and they’re on the west side of the map, they won’t go to a bathroom and will usually go to a trash can or the edge by the water.

Episode 21: Necessity has no law
← Previous Episode Index Next Episode →
Fae Facts: No new concepts today so let's learn about banshees! Depicted as a female spirit of mourning, their wailing or keening would be heard when a member of their family died, even if they were far away. Sometimes they would even wail before such a death, serving as a warning. The keening woman is a tradional feature of mourning in Irish culture.
Discussion Topics:
Why do you think Mariel pushed Elias towards this path?
Jealousy is a problem in many relationships. Do you think Chise and Elias will be able to reconcile?
Manga/BTS:
[Chapters 38-40]The manga reveals the name of the book Elias goes to the college to seek: The Testament of Carnamagos.
[I liked the manga translation of Nevin’s encouragement better]“Falter not in the waves of doubt. Soar high above the stormy seas. The strength to do that is growing within you. Now, tell me. What is it that you must do?"
Selected Favourite Quotes and Images from Last Episode:
image album
“Self-sacrifice. You think that by destroying yourself, you can earn the right to be here.”
"I have to think about my party next year."
Discussion Topics for Tomorrow, Episode 22:
[Question 1]Why do you think Chise's father left?
[Question 2]Where is the line between "curse" and "blessing" here?

Sailesh sat listlessly watching the rain drops just lazily slapping the window pane he was next to. He'd just arrived from a flight not long ago. Not only could he still feel the strain the long flight had on his knees, he was yearning to perhaps, stretch them out. But an Asar in Kathmandu doesn't relent. The downpour was vicious, often making it difficult to have any fun time. Forget hiking, he'd be lucky to even get past the hotel without getting soaking wet. As he took another long swig of his cigarette, he contemplated the life choice that led him to the place he was currently. Surely, it'd mark a closure, perhaps seal the old wound. He'd relish this.
As his breath clashed with the pane, and fog slightly formed, he was interrupted by the host,"So brother, what will you be having today?". He impatiently waved him off, angry that the waiter had interrupted his train of thoughts. The waiter, rather meekly said,"So will you have anything else, sir? This is your 6th peg, Mother was wondering if you'd like anything else". Sailesh softly chuckled before replying "I'm waiting". As the waiter gave him a knowing nod, and gently faded away, he took another swig of the whiskey he was drinking. Cheap shit will always be cheap, in this shithole, he thought to himself. Still, anything to get that familiar burn down your throat, with the slight buzzy sensation in your temple. For the money he was tossing at it, he couldn't possibly complain. It would be that he dearly missed his scotch - his favorite poison. He rapped at the table impatiently, she hasn't changed a bit, had she? Always taking her sweet time. As he could make out the silhouette of a woman with a child through the foggy glass, he grew excited: "She came, she finally did!". Not only that realization made him jerk back from him day dreaming, he proceeded to straighten up, and pull his hair back. After taking a few moments to compose himself, he hailed the waiter silently to take away the glass and empty his ash tray. As the entrance door slowly opened, he could make out his once love of his life, slowly approaching him with a kid, his, presumably. Aakanshya was a woman of sophistication, and absolute grace. The moment she walked towards you, you'd feel a gentle breeze on your forehead, whilst the back of your throat dried out, and you just wanted to steal a gaze from her, as long as time allowed. Her full lips often made you aware that even despite not smiling, she had a soft, gentle curve that made her face anything but hard. Suffice to say, Sailesh felt a cocktail of emotions within him growling, as he looked at a woman he once loved over anything else.
As she sat down with the kid, Sailesh gently motioned towards her. After a brief eye contact, he felt as if they were pulled down, away from it. Perhaps he still had feelings for her. Perhaps he was here to find out why things happened, the way they did. Still, he could feel the pangs of that same constricting pain in his heart, as if someone, or something, held it. It took an effort breathing in. And thus, he started, "So Aaku...". Aaku gently smiled back, that same smile he now knew he yearned for more than 5 years. As she waved, the kid chimed in, "Is he the uncle you were talking about, mummy?". Aakanshya slowly nodded, then proceeded to speak, "Yes, Sailesh uncle here is my best childhood friend. We practically grew up together, just like you and Saakshi". "Eww, Momma grew up with a boy? That's so funny hahaha". "No Arya, uncle here was very good at tying my ribbons! Firstly, say hi to uncle, will you, dear?" Arya suddenly shouted, "Namastey Sailesh uncle!" in a manner that could only be described as being contagious. It was impossible not to have your heart melt right there and there, this some five odd years old brat, speaking in the cutest manner possible. Sailesh extended his hand "I'm Sailesh, how old are you?". Arya looked puzzled at the hand offered to her, promptly looking towards her mother for clues on what to do. As Aakanshya motioned Arya to shake his hand, Arya followed suit. Sailesh hasn't shook a hand that was more tender, warm in a while. As he dismissed her hand, he directed his gaze towards Aakanshya. "How long has it been, again?" he said, words slightly slurred. Perhaps the whiskey finally hit. As Aakanshya drew a long breath, Sailesh leaned back, reaching for his zippo. That's when he noticed her hard gazed, the same stone cold, disappointed pair of the most beautiful doe eyes one could imagine, staring through him. As he followed her gaze to Arya, it hit him that perhaps lighting a cigarette in front of a child, wasn't the best of decisions. Arya chortled,"Look momma, uncle smokes too, just like Daddy!". As Aakanshya frowned,"Momma are you about to shout at uncle?", with the most innocent of eyes. Sailesh bit his lips in a mixture of embarrassment, and restlessless. Yeah, fucking A man, fucking A, light a cig right in front of the kid.
"So how have you been?" Sailesh said, huffing after his own silliness. Aakanshya answered,"I'm doing great, Sailu, how are you doing?". "Doing fine. Company offered me a vacation plan, I rejected, caught the very first plane from Cali straight here so I could perhaps go visit old friends. But with this weather...", Sailesh chuckled. Aaku sighed, "Well, that's a nice change I suppose. You always were the overworker". As Sailesh motioned the waiter yet again, he asked Arya, bored, "So what will you have, Arya?" Arya took the menu, and immediately pointed at what she wanted : An icecream. Well, she was certainly her mother's child, this girl. Once the orders were placed, Sailesh spoke "So what are you doing these days?" Aakanshya slowly turned her head towards Arya, and said "Well, mostly taking care of Arya. Housework was much more difficult than I imagined", she smiled softly. "How long are you staying?" Sailesh sighed,"Hard to tell. I can return anytime, but I was looking to meet old faces here. Suffice to say that's nigh impossible at this weather. So I'm probably going to get holed up in a hotel till I get back home". "And how are your parents, how's Aunty doing?" "You know they're dead, Aaku. Why must you ask?" Aakashya's eyes widened,"When?". Sailesh bitterly replied,"It's been what, 2-3 years?" "I'm sorry, Sailesh, I didn't know that". Sailesh's lips curved ironically, as he smiled and retorted,"Well, it's none of your business anyway, so there". Before those words were barely out, he regretted saying it. "But I do care. And I'm sorry." Sailesh could see hints of tear well up in her eyes. "Sorry I wasn't there for Aunty and Uncle". Sailesh whipped back, "Well they'd not count on it, after all, you abandoned me". Aakanshya look at Sailesh, with a look of surprise, speechless. Arya, startled, looked at Aakanshya, "Mommy, are you crying? Are you about to have a fight with uncle, just like daddy?" Sailesh asked, opportunistically, "Do mommy and daddy get in fights often?" "Yes, daddy shouts at mommy, and mommy shuts the door and cries. It's really sad, you know -" Aakanshya interrupted Arya's monologue, and quietly motioned her to hush. So Sailesh went into brooding, before letting out his next question, "You're happy with him, aren't you?" He could feel Aakanshya visibly disturbed, silent. Perhaps blaming her from the get go wasn't the best of ideas. At the same moment, the orders were served, and that was the end of that. As mere small talked, veiled in pain were exchanged on both sides, Sailendra couldn't help but walk down back the memory lane.
It was that night, that had been their last. They had sneaked out of their friend's wedding together, got to his apartment, then started making love. Intimacy with her was a special time, he'd only been vulnerable with so many women. As they rolled over the bed, he had gotten up to look at the moon-lit fields across the window. He had sat down in the arm chair, contemplating the difficulties ahead in life. He was but merely deep in thought, when she had rolled over, glistening in sweat beads, whilst gently being caressed by the moonlight. That's when she'd said, "Sailu, we should get married, na?" He had but merely scoffed, looking at her saying, "Babe, I'm hitting the states next week, I won't be back for at least 4 years, you seriously think I'd be able to take care of myself, let alone you?!" Whilst running his fingers on her playfully, he'd find her smiling slightly, then turning over, pulling the blankets. And that was the exchange they had, before she abruptly called Sailesh a week after he landed on states, stating she was getting married soon. And him, in a foreign land, feeling utterly dejected, and betrayed. Why did she choose this banker, over him? What possibly could that bald jerk give her, that he couldn't?
As Sailesh was wading through the free fall of his thoughts, reality struck when Arya tugged at his jacket. "Uncle, will you come home? I'll show you my doll". Sailesh, frowning, shook his head. Suppose it was time to part ways. The visit had been extempore, after all. He had called her on messenger right as he landed, perhaps to make peace with himself. Though how exactly this meeting ended up making him any less disturbed than he already was: He wouldn't know. All he knew was the ship had sailed, and he was left out in the rain. As the bills were paid, and they stood in front of the restaurant under umbrellas, Sailesh said "Well, guess this is it then. Take care, alright?" As Aakanshya turned after nodding, he could have sworn he saw her back shake.
As he stood there, questioning himself, all the while lighting his cigarette, he couldn't help but kick himself for being an ass. Perhaps he went too hard on her. After all, she did come, didn't she? And yet, he was right there, in the same spot she left her, 6 years back. As the gentle pitter patters of droplets onto the puddle singed but meekly, he looked at the mother-daughter slowly walking away from her. He was but just there, looking at her, then her daughter, a spitting image of her, going away, engrossed in conversation. As he scratched his nape, he couldn't help but spot a familiar birthmark on little Arya. Something he had grown accustomed to, often bemoaned about for being unsightly. Then it dawned him, that perhaps, this would be the last time he'd see her, as he couldn't possibly face himself after today's charades.
Not after what just happened, not after what he said to her.

After a long and drooling three weeks of modding up Skyrim SSE for Xbox X/S, I finally nailed it down to where you can have 150 mods with the old Bruma Expansion, and experience no CTD's or bugs.
I went back and forth using "Beyond Skyrim: Bruma v 1.3.3," and modding without it. But if you really like that mod as I do, you can have it ,and still add to the game with some really cool mods.
Unfortunately, you can't use the newer Bruma Expansion it has to be the older one, but even so, I managed to have a ton of creatures and just about every conversation mod there is, land, water and tree overhauls as well, and the game runs smooth. Been playing with this load order for almost two weeks and have had no crashes or bugs so far.
Make sure you install them in the order they're listed, and of course remember, when you do the NPC overhauls, do a hard reset for each. With all these I still have about 234.6MB left over, so you won't be overloading your game.
If any of these mods are not for you, feel free to add, or play around with the ones you prefer more, but at least load this list for you base, and then play around with the mods you want. If you nay questions, feel free to message me:
2023 XBOX ONE X Skyrim MOD List
(With Beyond Skyrim – Bruma)
1) Skyrim USSEP Patch
2) Beyond Skyrim: Bruma Part 1 (v1.3.3)
3) Beyond Skyrim: Bruma Part 2
4) Beyond Skyrim: Bruma Part 3
5) Campfire: Complete Camping System
6) Beyond Skyrim: Bruma Part 4
7) Skyrim Vanilla Plus v. 5.1.1
8) Cutting Room Floor
9) Oculus Main Menu & Loading Screen
10) Ugh Mods Manager Cap
11) Deadly Civil War Skyrim
12) Return to Helgen (v4.3)
13) Mystical Scholarship: The Magical College Bundle
14) JaySerpa’s Quest Expansion Bundle
15) Darker Brotherhood V2
16) The Notice Board
17) The Notice Board – Better Solstheim Quests
18) The Paarthurnax Dilemma
19) Moonpath To Elsweyr SSE
20) Bloodmoon – Call of The Werebeasts
21) Resurgence of The Morag Tong
22) Cheat Room
23) Audio SFX Overhaul
24) Skyrim Musical Overhaul [XBOX]
25) War Drums Combat Music
26) Enhanced Lights and FX
27) ELFX Fixes AIO
28) Magical College of Winterhold ELFX Patch
29) Vivid Weathers: Definitive Edition
30) Vivid Weathers: Definitive Edition Bruma Patch
31) Skyrim is Windy
32) Double Beds Are For Two People
33) The Great Cities, Towns, And Villages Bundle
34) The Great City of Solitude
35) The Great City of Solitude USSEP Patch
36) The Great Cities, Towns, and Villages EFLX Patch
37) Greater Markarth Expansion
38) Spaghetti’s Cities: Windhelm
39) Granite Hill
40) Greymoor
41) Humble Riches: A Whiterun Overhaul
42) Dragonborn Village Expanded East
43) JK’s Riverwood
44) Medeval Forts
45) [XB1] Skaal Village Overhaul
46) Solstheim Reborn
47) Eastern Dwemer Towers
48) Anna’s Riverwood Cabin XB1
49) Waterview – Beyond Skyrim Cyrodiil Home
50) Lanterns of Skyrim – Special Edition All In One
51) Bruma Lanterns XB1
52) Bruma Lanterns – Lanterns of Skyrim Patch
53) Lanterns in small Towns {XBOX1}
54) Road Signs Overhaul
55) Lit Road Signs
56) Carriage Stops of Skyrim XB1
57) Dooty – Outhouses of Skyrim
58) Pauly’s Lush Grasslands of Skyrim
59) Pauly’s Lush Forests of Skyrim
60) (XBOX) Dragonborn – Solstheim Boat Travel
61) Noble Skyrim – Ships and Boats of Skyrim
62) [XBOX] Birds and Flocks
63) [XB1] Birds of Skyrim
64) [XB1] skyBirds – Airborne Perch
65) Farm Animals Xbox Edition
66) Sea of Spirits – Xbox Edition
67) 4thUnknown’s AiO
68) Frost Giants
69) Yetis and Sasquatchs
70) Dragur Cavalry
71) Land Dreugh
72) Classic Ghosts
73) Zombies
74) XIVALI
75) Daedra Spider
76) Grievous Twilight
77) Silt Striders
78) Cliff Racers
79) Bantam Guars
80) Alit
81) More people
82) World Encounters Overhaul
83) Extended Encounters
84) Immersive Citizens – AI Overhaul
85) More Tavern Idles
86) Stronger Courier
87) AI Overhaul 1.8.3
88) UNP Body and face Renewal (Wet Skin) (Reizo’s Mod)
89) [XB1] Chris57 and Sundracon Male Body Replacer
90) Male Face Textures by Den987
91) Natural Eyes
92) Riften Docks Overhaul & Riften Expansion AIO
93) The Great Cities, Towns, and Villages AI Overhaul Patch
94) NPC Armor & Clothing Overhaul
95) Authentic Legion Replacer (v.1)
96) Rebel’s Ranger Gear
97) Ancient Shrouded Armor Replacer
98) Kynreeve Armor – A Daedric Set
99) Beyond Skyrim Bruma – Cyrodilic Armor
100) Face Masks of Skyrim
101) RS Children Optimized
102) RS Children – Old BS Bruma v.1.3.3 Patch
103) RS Children - Cutting Room Floor Patch
104) RS Children – AI Overhaul Patch
105) iNeed Food, Water, and Sleep
106) iNeed – Extended
107) [XB1] Super Simple Bathing
108) Longer Days: Realistic Timescale
109) Crime Overhaul [XB1]
110) Easy Lockpicking
111) Rewarding Reading (Xbox)
112) Ring of God Mode
113) Dovah Ring of Crafting - Alchemy
114) Craft Anything and Upgrade (Xbox)
115) Use Those Blankets
116) Run For Your Lives
117) BIG: Ultimate Kills
118) Immersive Projectiles Throwing Weapons & Items
119) Bloodthirst – Vampire NPC’s Can Feed
120) Enhanced Blood Textures
121) Dovahkiin Can, Sit, Kneel, and Lay Down
122) Large Stagger Animation
123) The Ultimate Sit Animation: Males
124) Female Sitting Animation Replacer
125) Immersive Lap Sitting
126) Kissing – Immersive Lovers Complete
127) Marriage All Xbox1
128) Odin – Skyrim Magic Overhaul
129) Mysticism – A Magic Overhaul (v.6)
130) Forgotten Spells
131) Balanced New Spells
132) Phenderix Magic Evolved
133) Radiant Dialogue SE
134) More Dialogue Options
135) More Dialogue Options – Immersive Citizens Patch
136) Misc Dialogue Edits & More Dialogue
137) Misc Dialogue Edits & More Dialogue – Immersive Citizens Patch
138) More To Say 9.0.2
139) Relationship Dialogue Overhaul
140) RDO - CRF + USSEP Patch
141) Young Lovers – Expanded Voices
142) Better Intimidation
143) Realistic Conversations (XB1)
144) Realistic Water Two SE (v.2)
145) Realistic Water Two – BS Bruma Patch
146) X32 Maximum Skeleton Special Edition
147) At Your Pace AIO (USSEP Version)
148) Alternate Start – Live Another Life
149) DAR NPC & Player Animations
150) Color Patches Remover [XB1/SE]
Revised: March 23, 2023

It's FRIDAY and I have something cool! I literally JUST POURED THIS this afternoon ... and then antiqued it. This is a PROTOTYPE and will be offered on a more permanent basis once I hammer out a few kinks ...
v2 .999 Fine Silver DERRINGER : https://imgur.com/a/zL9T2Eh
This puppy weighs 7.5 troy ounces and is pure silver. I antiqued it lightly in Liver of Sulphur and then buffed off the high spots. There's some minor casting defects here and there - after all it is a prototype. I made a diamond pattern on the grip and I modelled the engraved Acanthus by myself last just last night since I couldn't find someone to do it for me :)
Asking price $350.00. Since this is the PROTOTYPE, I will include a Certificate of Authenticity denoting this as the v2 Derringer, Serial Number 1.
PIC - PIC - PIC - PIC
Now for normal stuff ...
PUDDING! (Proof) : https://imgur.com/a/zmZ1hWR
DICKBUTT is back - tonight is the official launch of this fine specimen ... I did a soft launch on Monday and my inbox cracked under the pressure. If you don't know what Dickbutt is ... well ... it's a DICK. With a BUTT. And the BUTT has a DICK.
FRONT - BACK - BONUS!
$70.00 each, free shipping.
2 Troy Ounce .999 Fine Silver ANVIL ::: I made this because I thought it would be cool. I absolutely love it... it's just so beefy!!! ::: $80.00 each.
Number 1 of my new Pocket Carry coins ::: "FUCK YOU PAY ME" ::: This was originally created to be a card protector for a world famous poker tournament champion, but he thought it would also be fun to make a 1 troy ounce version as well, so here we are! ::: $35.00 each.
Hylian Shields ::: These weigh 2+ Troy Ounces and are hand poured. These STACK, too! ::: $70.00 each
Rupees ::: 1+ Troy Ounce rupees! These are so neat!!! ::: $35.00 each
Master Sword ::: These weigh 2+ Troy Ounces and are hand poured. Epic! ::: $90.00 each
Buster Sword ::: Cloud Strife's weapon of choice! 2+ Troy Ounces ::: $80.00 each
NES Carts - SNES Carts - N64 Carts - GAMEBOY Carts ::: 2+ Troy Ounces, HIGHLY detailed, and with the LABEL OF YOUR CHOICE! ::: $65.00 each (add $5 for gold plating or blackening)
v2 N64 Controller ::: These are BEEFY and exquisitely detailed. Shockingly chunky feeling in the hand! ::: $70.00 each
Lucky 38 "Platinum Chip" ::: Made of PURE .999 Fine Silver! From "New Vegas" - this great little pocket carry weighs 1 troy ounce and has been antiqued to look more appropriate for something that survived a nuclear holocaust. ::: $50.00 each
v2 Grenade ::: You guys begged me to update this! Much crisper and higher detail, and still an absolute pain to make! 2+ troy ounces of .999 Fine Silver ::: $85.00 each - I am raising the price because I hate making them and I am getting ready to discontinue them entirely.

CHESS

The weights listed below are actual SILVER, and do not include the included felt pads. Any pieces ordered can be blackened at no extra charge. ADD $10 per piece for GOLD PLATING.
The KING : Over 1.5 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $100.00 each
The QUEEN : Over 1.5 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $100.00 each
The BISHOP : Over 1 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $60.00 each
The KNIGHT : Over 1 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $60.00 each
The ROOK : Over 1 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $60.00 each
The PAWN : Over 0.5 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $45.00 each

OR IN SETS ...

ONE OF EACH Set ( A King, Queen, Bishop, Rook, Knight, and Pawn ) : Over 6.5 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $400.00 each (Add $50 for GOLD PLATING)
HALF BOARD Set ( All pieces for Just One Side ) : Over 13 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $750.00 each (Add $100 for GOLD PLATING)
FULL BOARD w/BLACKENED Set ( All Pieces Needed to Play, PLUS a Wooden Chessboard ) : Over 26 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $1300.00 each 10% Off For a LIMITED TIME! ::: $1,170.00!
FULL BOARD w/GOLD PLATING Set ( All Pieces Needed to Play, PLUS a Wooden Chessboard ) : Over 26 Troy Ounces of .999 Fine Silver : $1300.00 each 10% Off For a LIMITED TIME! ::: $1,170.00!

SHIPPING

Shipping is FREE - but I only ship to USA Addresses!

PAYMENT

I accept ZELLE, Venmo, and CashApp in that order of preference. Under no circumstances will I be able to accept Paypal.
Thanks again for looking at this! :) It was launched at 6:00pm Arizona time on 3/24/23!

F, 29 1,57 I don’t know my weight, but my bmi is defined over 25, have I read correctly, does plan B INCREASES the risk of pregnancy in these cases?

• My period ended last night
• My period is very irregular
• I have polycystic ovarian syndrome
  
• I’ve had a big bilateral pulmonary embolism in 2019
  
• 2 months before the embolism 1st symptoms, I started taking a birth control pill. I can’t remember the name but I remember being told it was one of the highest hormone dosages in the market more than once.
  
• After the embolism, I found out I have hight factor VIII
  
• Having a child would ruin my life, it’s out of the question
  
• He came inside me about an hour and a half ago
  
• I have rivaroxabana with me because I just took a plane.
  

Should I take the pill or will I die suffocated? I won’t hold any of you accountable, of course. And I know you can’t predict the future.

My dad has stage 4 kidney cancer. Unfortunately it is also a very rare type of kidney cancer and his doctors don't really know what to do. He has been diagnosed for a little over 3 years now.
I (16f) live with my dad and always have. Yesterday in 3rd period my twin sister told me that my mom told her my dad told my mom his doctor said he only has about a year left to live. I'm guessing my dad didn't want to tell me because it would make me cry. I don't think he told his mom (my grandma) either.
2 and a half weeks before Christmas last year he was put into the hospital because he was in so much pain he was constantly screaming and crying in pain. He was there for a week and a half before they finally decided he actually wasn't faking the pain and did a scan. They found a spot of cancer that was pushing against his spine and fractured it.
They gave him new pain meds and he got to come home the day before Christmas eve.He started having radiation therapy and they got the spot of cancer to dissapear. Fast forward to last Tuesday. He was starting to be able to walk more than he was but he had to get a scan last Tuesday. The results came back and his spine is a lot worse and there is a new spot of cancer that is in a place on his spine They csnt do radiation to get rid of it. They said it could paralyze him.
He goes back next Tuesday and he said he has like 12 appointments to go to.
I dont know what I will do if he dies.

​
I gathered some footage from the next ep and created this theory with something that might make sense; I don't know if the writers would have the courage to go for something that heavy but it could happen.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbqVQqr4AxI
1 - 0:40 - they are eating something on the floor, something that ''just died''; apparently jackie is going to be burned (whether for a funeral or for food) so i guess its not her on the ground because the meat would be cooked.
2 - 0:46 - Shauna is going to have the baby in this ep and by Misty's face things aren't going so well
3 - 0:42 - the coach Ben was crying while eating the ''thing'' so it's not just any animal they hunted
Bottom line: What if they're eating the baby because he didn't make it through the birth?

My husband and I are in our 40s with 2 young teenage kids. He is close to his parents but we don’t live that near to them so only see them every few months but they speak on the phone regularly, as do the kids. The grandparents spoil our kids when they do see them and our kids love them. All great.
My husband’s sister is 3 years older and lives near their parents so we also only see her a few times a year though I like her and we get on well when we do see her (our kids adore her and she is wonderful with them). She is married but they do not have kids, which she desperately wanted. I really feel for her and can’t imagine how difficult it must be. She’s really stoic though and keeps things to herself, doesn’t really bring it up at least not to me. On occasion my MIL has let slip things which suggest she finds it hard.
My in laws have told us they have made wills. Apparently after both die, the assets will be split 3 ways: 1 third to their son, 1 third to their daughter and then 1 third split between any grandchildren.
My husband is uncomfortable about this. He has a strong sense of fairness and thinks it disadvantages his sister and ‘punishes’ her for her fertility issues. He also knows his sister is very close to their parents, particularly their mum and thinks it will be very hard for her to receive less than our family receives (personally not financially).
He wants to talk to his parents and persuade them to change the wills to 50/50, him and his sister. He says (and I believe him) that he hasn’t talked about it with his sister. I don’t know what she thinks other than hearing her once saying to her parents that “I will be furious if you get old and don't put your heating on so you can leave us some money that we don’t need”. It leads me to think she’s not thinking it’s her money.
My SIL and her husband have good jobs, nice cars and a nice home and I don’t think they are struggling. My parents in law own an average priced house and are only in their early 70s and in good health so it’s not even like anything is imminent.
I think we should let my in laws leave their own money how they want. Obviously it advantages my kids but that’s their choice, My husband thinks I’m being selfish and unreasonable and wants to speak to both them and his sister. I don’t want him to and we’ve been arguing.
I can see both sides but appreciate I may be TA here. Please be gentle with me if you think I am though, because I do want to be reasonable

What are everyone’s thoughts on the TUC glossary? Initially I thought it was Bakker’s way of providing some worldbuilding from an external perspective. However, having read through it in its entirety, it’s definitely an in-world artefact, right? Most of the entries are almost entirely factual and have no emotional weight to them, but some of them suggest to me that it’s actually an in-world, post-Resumption work, which has some implication for the future events of the series. Bakker may well have already confirmed exactly what the glossary is exactly, so this post could be a waste of time.
The entry that specifically interests me is the “Metagnosis.”

Metagnosis - Complication of the Gnosis discovered and elaborated by Anasûrimbor Kellhus over the course of his tenure as Aspect-Emperor. A great deal of speculation regarding the metaphysics and capacities of the Metagnosis have arisen since Our Lord and Prophet first used it to strike down the Cishaurim at Shimeh.

There is a little bit more to the entry, but that is the part which interests me, specifically the part I’ve highlighted in bold. “Our Lord and Prophet.” For me there’s two interesting aspects to this entry:

1. If the glossary isn’t an in-world text, why would Bakker refer to Kellhus in that way? Doesn’t seem right. The obvious explanation is that it’s actually an in-world text and the author is an ardent Zaudunyani.
   
2. Given the language of the entry, when can we assume the glossary was actually written? Initially you’d think it has simply been written before Resumption, and so naturally the author is going to be positive when referring to Kellhus. But I don’t know if that’s the case.
   

There are several entries in the glossary which give death dates for characters who die after Kellhus bans all communication between the Ordeal and the Empire. The most recent (from what I’ve noticed) are the entries relating to the Battle of Dagliash, for example Coithus Saubon’s lifespan is given as 4069-4132, so the author of the glossary knows about all the events of the Aspect-Emperor series, at least up to and including book 6. As far as I can tell, there are no entries detailing anything which took place in The Unholy Consult but I feel it’s safe to assume that that is just Bakker playing it safe and not putting any spoilers in there.
Now considering all that information, if we assume the author is an Eärwan historian (which I’d say is a given), then we must also assume the events of books 4-7 are somehow relayed back to the historian in their entirety by someone who was in the Ordeal. Now the last thing the Ordeal thinks it sees is Kellhus (as the No-God) unleashing a horde of Sranc and a whirlwind on the Ordeal. The Ordeal (probably) wrongly assumes Kellhus is the No-God, that it’s him who has started the second apocalypse, and that he brought them all that way just to kill them all. I feel an event like that would break the even most zealous Zaudunyani’s faith in their prophet. So why, despite everything I’ve just mentioned, is the glossary still referring to Kellhus as “Lord and Prophet” even though it’s pretty clear the author should know what happened at Golgotterath (from the Ordeal’s perspective)? I think there’s two possibilities:

1. Somehow, someone sneaks into the Golden Room and figures out exactly what happened. Everyone finds out Kellhus didn’t betray humanity, but simply lost. His reputation somehow remains intact despite his failure.
   
2. There’s been plenty of theories surrounding Kellhus’ death and that he’s actually got contingencies in place (Decapitants, oasis in the Outside, etc.). Perhaps one of these contingencies is true, and he somehow still ends up winning, and everyone knows it.
   

Anyone have any thoughts about this? I suppose it’s also possible some entries have simple been written before others, and so entries such as “Metagnosis” are from before the events of books 4-7, and others are from afterwards, but I think that someone as significant as Kellhus would have any entries related to them updated to reflect their apparent treachery.

Hi everyone! I've realized recently that I don't ever carry 80% of my collection, and I've decided whatever I don't carry has got to go. I am the second owner for most of these knives, so I've tried to capture any flaws on the knives the best I could in the videos as well as description. Discounts of $10 on each knife if you buy more than one.
Knife Videos - Timestamps
Spyderco Knifejoy Bowie - 400
Not as nice as the original one from spyderco, but still glassy smooth and razor sharp, with a bank vault full titanium chris reeve lock. The previous owner carried this a bit, so there is a bit of wear on the blue anodizing, and some scratches near the lock area and under the pocket clip. I think he also added a mirror edge on the blade that I tried to capture the best I could in the video.
Spyderco Smock S30V - 180
The second detent is still in place, and the only mod is that the previous owner installed a wire clip so you can deep carry it. No flaws or issues with the knife asides from that, and the original clip is still included with the knife.
Spyderco Kapara CQI - 150
No flaws that I can see. Action is extremely smooth especially with the CQI improvements, and edge is still factory without much use past cutting some printer paper. Too large for where I live, where anything over 3" is a "deadly weapon" so I never carry it outside of the house. I haven't ever used it for cooking, but the ergonomics feel perfect for it, and the carbon fiber is the perfect combination of grippy and classy.
Spyderco Sage 1 CF - 100
Discontinued years ago, and still shaving sharp with flawless scales. I've never carried or used this knife outside of testing it on paper. Action is also glassy smooth and easily flickable. I'd carry this more but I prefer front flippers and thumbstuds for their more streamlined profile.
Kahr Arms Delica w/ Aramis Scales - 225
Got this when my wife and I were planning on moving to Boston so I'd still have a functional yet legal knife to carry around. We changed our mind, and I like the dragonfly more anyways so I'm letting this one go. It's more difficult to get your hands on these nowadays with everything going on, so grab it while you can. No flaws on the blade or on the scales that I can see.
Shamwari CLONE - 120
This is a CLONE with carbon fiber handles and a beautiful M390 blade. I don't support clones, but hey it's already out there so if you want to try out a 3.3" Shamwari before dropping 2.5K on a full custom this is the knife for you. Action is obviously not as nice as the custom, but it's as glassy smooth and drop shutty as you can get at this price point.
ShamWEri - 325
This is a production version of the famous Shamwari made in collaboration with WE knives. One of the best production folders I've ever handled, and while it is obviously not as nice as the custom version, it's as close as you're going to get at 1/4 the price. The edge is still factory, and there are light snails on the handles, pivot, and pocket clip. Action is smooth as glass, and is extremely fun to fidget with due to the front flipper deployment. Finally, unlike the custom, this blade is 20CV rather than M390, which I'm told are basically the same steel just different names.

F, 29 1,57 I don’t know my weight

• My period ended last night
• My period is very irregular
• I have polycystic ovarian syndrome
  
• I’ve had a big bilateral pulmonary embolism in 2019
  
• 2 months before the embolism 1st symptoms, I started taking a birth control pill. I can’t remember the name but I remember being told it was one of the highest hormone dosages in the market more than once.
  
• After the embolism, I found out I have hight factor VIII
  
• Having a child would ruin my life, it’s out of the question
  
• He came inside me about an hour and a half ago
  
• I have rivaroxabana with me because I just took a plane.
  

Should I take the pill or will I die suffocated? I won’t hold any of you accountable, of course. And I know you can’t predict the future.

Why hello everyone my name is Gage and I'm 29 years old located in Washington state. I thought I would give reddit a shot to meet and talk to people. I will list some interesting things about myself.

1. I teach 23 six-year-olds at once every single day so I believe I have the most patience anyone can have lol. Even though it’s very difficult at times, I absolutely love it and wouldn't trade it for anything else with seeing their faces light up when they accomplish something.
2. I work out about 4-5 times a week so I feel like I'm very disciplined when it comes to my schedule.
3. I'm an extra ball of goofiness with my personality (I'm with kids all day so how could I not be like that right?)
4. Whenever I'm not teaching, I'm either playing video games, working out, watching sports, hanging out with friends.
5. I'm a consistent communicator and feel like communication is the most important part of making things work.
6. I'm just a positive person in general and love to bring others up as much as I can!

Here's a picture of me if you're curious! I hope to hear from you soon :)
https://imgur.com/a/7xhyLxO